Answer to my problem is going to be a big challenge.When you read details,you will find serious contradictions.
Our love we believe,is timeless..
We both want to keep this relationship for life.what should we do?How do we solve issues?
As i see:
We share every thought openly and honestly.
One more thing, i was going through a bad phase,a kind of depression, when we met 3yrs back.
Today i am strong and self confident.
Sometimes I think his love and guidance had brought me back from a hopeless state.
Whenever he tried to FADE away-I kind of slid back into depression .
I keep telling him that my marriage to someone else,will be tough on him.
last week, i offered to remain unmarried for life-to keep our relationship going,to avoid hurting him...
But on many occasions i have a very strong urge to get married...get beautiful status of happily married woman in society.
He has offered to marry me-wants to marry me next year,after providing good money for his family.
Pl dont say Quit, DUMP HIM
2006-07-12
00:11:42
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11 answers
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asked by
Anonymous
in
Arts & Humanities
➔ Philosophy
He is in Blore,India.I am working in a hospital in Bombay.
He has a loving wife,great kids.His finances are a bit tight at the moment but in 6-8 months he would have more than enough money.
I meet him once in 20 days,spend the night.We have a great sex life.We speak for almost one hour a day, on phone.
He truly and madly loves me.He still wants me to find someone and get married by next year.
I also want to marry,partly cause i do not want his family life to get disturbed.
I think he hates it when i get to meet men with marriage on my mind.
Our age gap bothers me-what will friends and relatives say is the question.Cant take him to my parents,Cant have public display of emotions and hold his arm in public.
Once or twice i told him that...i might be using him.
I have strong sexual urges and needs.I want him to meet me and have sex atleast once in 15 days.
For last18 months or so i have an exclusive relationship with him.
Pl help us to find a way.we do not want to stop this relationship.
2006-07-12
00:12:00 ·
update #1
if he cheats on this wife he will cheat on you also--
ask yourself -- do you want to be considered a home wrecker?!?
2006-07-12 00:17:04
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answer #1
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answered by flatlander1967 2
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Hello Pretty Girl, We can all have many loves. Marriage is only for property or children. Brothers and sisters should not have children. Keep the relationship. If you find someone else, or another marriage or love comes later just move on. Honor his family and wife and never do anything to harm that relationship. Marriage and a piece of paper do not make you faithful. That comes from love and honor. Be true to yourself and your love. After some reflection and thought, I think his wife must know about you and approve. Women can tell what is going on with their men. There is probably one more of you out there. Men need sex about once a week and that is probably more than the wife wants so she gives him a night out once a week. He must care about you tho as he wants you to get married and have a family of your own. Until that time comes, just enjoy the relationship and be good to and for each other.
2006-07-12 07:22:07
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answer #2
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answered by Pey 7
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Purely from a psychoanalytical point of view (i'n not a psychologist so this is merely opinion) you speak of finances quite a lot and of "having enough money to get by". I don't for think that you're in it for the money, but i do reckon that the stability of having a good wage is something you crave (or at least need). You also want "status (sic) in society". Are you doing this for the right reasons?
Would you even be able to reach the upper echelons of society in India if you were remarried? Excuse my ignorance, but aren't divorcees seen as being "damaged"?
I think you should keep your relationship going and stop focusing on the material reasons for staying with your bloke. Concentrate on what attracts you - his personality, smile etc etc.
I hope you find happiness.
2006-07-12 07:22:35
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answer #3
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answered by kenfitameen 3
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Come on wake up guys like that don't leave their wives, any way's why would you want him to?great sex can happen with single men age don't mean anything but till death do us part does!besides he will only do the same to you, it's hard enough to trust a man how could you live with a man that's cheating on his wife and kids with a younger women, just remember if your the wife and have kids and he out late or not back when expected. i guess you will be the one wondering if he has moved on to some younger than you, and your heart will be breaking,your kids crying for daddy think about.
2006-07-12 07:41:09
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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This seems like more of a relationship of need that has grown into a relationship of affection, which might appear to you as love.
Now consider this, what if twenty years down the line you find that you have grown enough to no longer need his emotional support, which right now seems to you like love? DO you want to spend rest of your life, with a father figure or do you want to find an equal partner in life?
PS: Great sex is never an indication of great love.
2006-07-12 07:34:54
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answer #5
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answered by Abhishek Joshi 5
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If the two of you are truly in love then tell him to leave his wife and marry you. What makes the two of you happy is what really counts and you should be together. In your situation someone always gets hurt and that can't be helped. Love like yours comes once in a lifetime. So go for it and be together forever.
2006-07-12 08:35:05
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answer #6
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answered by kittylove 2
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You should be ashamed of your self. He is married with children? What kind of self respecting person takes a man from his family in good conscious? And if you were to marry him what makes you think that he wouldn't do the same to you? I am sorry for your depression. And your troubles. But that is what friends are for. And counslers. You are manipulating yourself into believing in something that can't and must not be., because you can find no other reason to pull your self from your depressive state. Find love in your self. And true love will follow. But not with a man who is committed to a family. Think of his poor children , and being raised without their dad. Is that fair to them? To have no chance? Stop calling! Have some respect, for your self, for him, and for his family.!
2006-07-12 08:03:40
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answer #7
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answered by firedup 6
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your situation is like mine the same age an his age is same as mine.an year in relationship too
.but we are all single an never marries before
he proposed to me ..
but your situation is that he had a wife already ..
why dont you stay away from him for a couple of time an forget him it will help you..so that u can build your soul for someone ..mind dont give up u may find someone who loves you no matter what or long u two have been together..
to keep him he can not divorced his wife for you..i dont think u ll love him in future if he does to ya for the sake of someone else..
watch out i believe you had someone somewhere to love you.ur beautiful ..you are too young lady..chance is your..
2006-07-12 07:41:23
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answer #8
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answered by peaches an cream 3
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You will not get the answer you want, it is impossible to answer this the way you want it. Only the truth. Move on with your life or keep living a lie, your choice. Sorry the truth hurts
2006-07-12 07:19:36
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answer #9
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answered by heartless 2
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You are screwing a married man and he will never leave his wife and marry you. Face reality.
2006-07-12 07:18:47
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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What he problem in that if he loves you and his wife know all the story!!!
2006-07-12 07:26:45
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answer #11
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answered by Anonymous
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