They went to hotel to have sex. what should i do?
2006-07-11 19:56:00 · 25 answers · asked by trouble 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's not illegal to have sex with your cousin, but it's immoral. Divorce him, he is cheating on you with another woman. For all you know, this could have been going on for years.
Get out while the going is good and find yourself a reliable man. Leave them to their sordid affair, you are best out of it!
2006-07-11 20:39:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Was this after your marriage or before? It wouldn't matter to me-- I would treat it just like it was any other girl-just because it's his cousin doesn't let him off the hook, and he was unfaithful to you and may bring home some dreaded disease there is no cure for, such as AIDS or any of the other hundreds of STDs currently being passed around. It depends on if you want to save your marriage, but after I told him he must go to the doctor to have STD tests to see if he can give you anything, I'd ask him if he would go to marriage counseling. However, it depends on his age as to whether he feels trapped or just wanted to commit the unacceptable thing of having sex with his cousin. You also need to address that issue with him. A marriage counselor can help you and often someone in your church willl listen. Trust will be an issue now and often without trust a marriage can't endure. If I were you, I'd find out how long the sex thing has been going on with her and usually there's more than one extra partner somewhere, maybe a lot of extra-marital partners. Is love enough to hold your marriage together not knowing how many more there are and how long this has been going on?
2006-07-12 03:54:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
While you were married? Or beforehand? First cousin? All of these make a difference in my response.
If it's while you were married, it's cheating reagardless of who it's with and you should decide whether it's worth staying with a cheating husband.
If it was before you were married, I'm not sure it should matter. Yeah, it's a little weird, but if it happened a long time ago, it's best to let it go.
If it's his first cousin, it's weird. If it's a second cousin or beyond, or a cousin through marriage...it's more common than you think.
2006-07-12 03:02:28 · answer #3 · answered by seattlecutiepie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still want to be with him, as in if you think that you can forgive him once the shock has died down a little bit, I would recommend that you ask him if you BOTH can go to a marriage counselor. Why? One, if he did this during your marriage, he cheated on you period and that action is selfish. Two, willing having sex with his cousin proves that there are other serious issues that need to be resolved. However, if he chooses not to go, he does not realize the gravity of the situation, and you may need to separate from him. Or, as a last resort, leave him.
2006-07-12 03:10:18 · answer #4 · answered by N P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If i was you, i would talk to him and find out why. I don't know anything about him or im not sure how long you have been married or if you have children but it is hard to throw it all away. If you have a church that you go to maybe you could talk to you pastor. if not than maybe you could find one. just don't listen to all the negativity. I know it is hard to understand and you may not be able to, but don't just throw it away. Take some time.
I do hope everything goes okay,
my deepest sympathy.
2006-07-12 03:17:17 · answer #5 · answered by ghd 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you were married at the time that is considered cheating.Were you married at the time?I've never had this happen to me.If you do stay together you will probably have a hard time trusting him again.Give yourself some time to process what has happened and then decide whether you should leave or stay.
2006-07-12 10:01:00 · answer #6 · answered by jennifersgrs 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be a bit patient. Then handle the situation like a doctor handle the very challenging accidental case.
You need to know:
When this affair started?
What he likes in her?
Whether other relatives know about this?
Can you let others know and put social pressure on him?
( do not let him know that you know it. Otherwise he may become more open to it.Depends upon situation.)
Keep him satsfied sexually with sexual art.
are u having kids?
Hope you will analyze and act with patience.
2006-07-12 03:09:55 · answer #7 · answered by consultant 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When does the sex moment happen? Before or after married? If before maybe it was just act in the moment of folly...... But if during your marriage, you ought to leave him. Y? Because it's signalling to you that your sex life sucks. Such man worth the dump. It can happen once, can happen again....
2006-07-12 03:08:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know u felt cheated but be calm,confront him n find out the truth from him n remind him of promises n vow before your marriage.look at yourself if there is slack in your attitude towards him.To get married is simple but to stay married is not easy and it take a lot of sacrifice to stay married.If things got bad to worse n if reasoning can't solve then u choose other option.
2006-07-15 03:43:11 · answer #9 · answered by Bugsy M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave. One its disgusting to cheat on anybody, let alone with a cousin. He seems as though he is sick man who obviously doesn't care about you. You deserve so much more honey. Good Luck, and I'm sorry.
2006-07-12 03:49:16 · answer #10 · answered by okay 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋