i figure it is because he is going to cheat we went through this before, and he changed his mind, got me back now he is going through this again. should i hive him another chance?
2006-07-11 18:03:58 · 43 answers · asked by jooje@sbcglobal.net 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
p.s. i do everything he likes
2006-07-11 18:05:52 · update #1
He wants his cake and to eat it too.
With diseases these days and condoms not being 100% protective... is it really worth it to take the chance of YOU getting a sexually transmitted disease from someone HE slept with? That's IF he wore a condom. I mean, people who will sleep with married men... you can bet they've "been around the block a few times".
Aren't you worth more than a straying, cheating husband? What's the point of being married then?
2006-07-11 18:07:10 · answer #1 · answered by lily 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because he's an immature idiot. Somewhere along the line, he picked up the notion that he can have any woman out there because he has you, and you're too good for him, so he can have all those other women out there who are also too good for him. He obviously doesn't remember what it was like when he was single, or he'd be thanking his lucky stars that he has you.
You should ask him why he wants to have an open relationship, and exactly what he means by that. Chances are, you would probably have much more success finding a boy toy than he will a playmate, so ask him if he wants to hear about your sexual exploits or if you should just keep them to yourself. When he realizes that you're on a two-way street, he might come to his senses and apologize for even thinking about another woman. If he doesn't, at a minimum it's time for counseling. If he seems unlikely to change and you can no longer trust him, it's time to consider divorcing his immature a**.
Good luck!
2006-07-11 18:16:04 · answer #2 · answered by Judgie C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depending on how long you have been married..is it the mid-life thing? He's just wanting to make sure he's not "missing" anything. Did he actually cheat before? you never specifically said. if you went through it before and are still together, go through it again. Stay together, these are the little things that can make a marriage stronger. You said you do all he likes.....want a tip? Tell him a secret/fantasy of yours, and then ask for one of his....you might be surprised. Otherwise dog the hell out of him, and make him so bow-legged he couldn't get it up to cheat if he tried!!! That's what my wife did:) No problems now!!
2006-07-11 18:22:15 · answer #3 · answered by Chaz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only if you want to waste your time hun i am not trying to be rude. But i would not let him have another chance if he can not resecpt you for you and wants an ( open relationship as he calls it ) that is a suger coating meaning cheating.I would leave him if it was me because you allow him to come back . I understand you love him but if he loves you then he would not do that to you .When people marry the donot want to see other people they would want to be together .So this tells me that he may not be in love with you .( sorry to say ) .Love does not suppose to hurt you but to make you feel good about you and life and to feel good about the otherr person to . I prey to god that you may seek a marrage counslor even if he does not go that does not mean that you can not go you are doing this for yourself not for him.And get some guide from the counslor it will help . You do not need someone that is close to you because the are involed with there imotions and that would nnot be healthy for the both of you .But if you need some support them you can IM me at anytime God Bless
2006-07-11 18:15:08 · answer #4 · answered by purpal2002002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Open? Meaning flings or being with someone different for a night (not meaning a wife and g/f at the same time)? It could be something more.... like you? Sit him down and ask him why... what is it he is wanting.... to be desired again? To be wanted again? To have hard-core sex again like a teen-ager? Also, it could open up possiblities to you two as a couple. For instance, if he has a fling... and comes home feeling great (with no future strings attached), who is he going to un-leash it on....? You, of course!! He's going to take it out on you! Yeah, while the deed is happening, he might be thinking of her, but who's reaping the rewards (definitely not her)?! It would also depend on how long you two have been together and how trusting you are with each other.
2006-07-11 18:12:30 · answer #5 · answered by Holly Moore 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well how do you feel about it? If he wants an open marriage that means you need to remind him that you as well can go out and play as well. Now you may not want to but maybe the tho ught of you having fun may change his mind???
Now since you have already been through this changes are he is already considering someone in his mind. Look into it and see if that's the road you both want to take. Remember sweetie get yourself tested in case he has already been.....
2006-07-11 18:08:58 · answer #6 · answered by moonspawnhotmailcom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to have an open relationship the chances of him bringing a disease home to you are very high. Right now the fastest growing segment of the AIDS population are married women(world wide). If he wants to have an open relationship then he is PLANNING on engaging in risky behavior. Seek professional help your life is on the line.
If you let him have an open relationship then have him tested for HIV and STDS regularly.
2006-07-11 18:10:47 · answer #7 · answered by Today is the Day 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you gave the green light. Obviously you lead him to believe that you were ok with having an open relationship. Kind of hard to take that back. Hopefully, he'll get it out of his system and will be totally monogamous with you. Until then, why don't you go out and do the same. Go have fun! Hey! Go to adultfrienderfinder.com! They have alot of hotties there. Just remember, love is not sex. Keep them seperate.
2006-07-11 18:10:03 · answer #8 · answered by kylanusoftly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really still want him, which I can tell you do love him, try to "attract" him back.
1. dress up more
2. exercise
3. be independent
4. tell him how "this guy" praised you at work for being such a great person or smart or witty.
My guess is that you dont even think you are important as a person, thus he treats you as an unimportant person as well. Get SELF-CONFIDENCE, threaten to divorce him.
He'll come running back if you do. You have to stand for you right! Don't be a doormat!
2006-07-11 18:10:04 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Stay away from him. He wants an open relationship so that he can have his cake and eat it too.
He does not think you would actually go out and be with other guys, however he knows if that he can not be faithful.
If he actually knew you would take him up on it and actually pursue an outside relationship, he would not be pushing it so much,
Humans are territorial - when its anyone else they don't care but when its on home turf its personal.
2006-07-11 18:08:18 · answer #10 · answered by kitt 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋