What am I supposed to do?

Question

I've been gay since I was born, well I remember fancing guys since I was 7-8? I also fancied girls but I am not attracted to them when it comes to sexual terms. I haven't told anyone about it, well I did, I told one of my best friends (female) but I am afraid of coming out since my Mum is always talking **** about gay people =( and she apparently hates them. I feel so lonely, I'm afraid this could last forever, I don't know if I'll ever find a guy that loves me. All i finds is 'queers' (no offence) and pervs. I don't know what to do. I've considered suicide as an alternative, but I really don't know what to do. I am afraid, I am a 17-year-old lad that only wants to be happy and be loved. =)

Answer 1

I imagine that your mother would rather have a gay son than a dead son.

I hate to say it -- but being 17 sucks for heterosexuals as much as it does for you. It was certainly the worst year of my life. Things get better as you get older. For me, going away to college changed everything.

Answer 2

I am 40 and I want to be happy and loved. I am a lesbian and became disabled and was really sick and my left arm is pretty badly scarred and I am in a wheelchair and no woman wants that. I have no hope of ever finding anyone. You are young and will probably go through many relationships before you find the right one, but you have hope. I don't know where you are looking for men or where you live. Find some gay organizations and get involved and meet new people.

Answer 3

My Mom is very Christian also, and until she "knew" someone gay "me" she didn't change her mind. Once she found out however, things changed because I was basically her favorite, I was the most like her and the most caring and she had a problem equating me with evil. I'm not saying this happens to everyone. I was just fortunate. However, our parents are at least as smart as we are usually, so some may already have some idea . . .

Also suicide is for those with no hope, at 17, you have all kinds : ))

Answer 4

Well, this is a tough situation, but don't give up. You should start correcting your mom when she makes anti-gay comments and educating her on homosexual issues. You don't have to tell her that you are gay right now, but try to prepare her. Also, you're young. So try not to get too discouraged that you won't find a good man. Just keep dating and trying. Everyone, even straight people, have a hard time with dating here and there because it's tough to find a person to share your life with. It's also a good idea for you to get a support group. Try to get involved with your local gay community. And Myspace is a good place to make friends with other young gay people (you can check out my myspace page through my profile and we can chat more). Good luck!

Answer 5

Don't feel bad, dude. Most gay guys have gone through exactly what you're feeling in their late teens. I think that you should tell your Mom about who you are. If she really does talk that way about gays, maybe once she finds out that her son is gay, it will help to change her perception of gays altogether.

Your lonliness will not last forever. I know it feels like it will, but I promise it won't. Suicide is NEVER an answer... it is the wimp's way out. Wouldn't you feel more proud of yourself knowing that you took the brave road and came out of it a better person?

If you ever wanna talk about it, hit me up.

Answer 6

Come out, enjoy your life, after all it is YOUR life, not your mother's or anyone else's. Your mum only has to put up with you for the first 20 or so years until you leave home, you on the other hand have to put up with yourself for the rest of your life, so get to like yourself now.
Ignore all the abuse, most people who abuse gays are usually gay themselves but don't want to own up.
I am sure that you will find someone soon.
Asd regards suicide, don't even try it, its too difficult.

Answer 7

Maybe you are depressed at this moment, that's why you thinks about suicide. I am a woman and I have a lot of gay friend. I am not a lesbian. I was also member of their carnival groups. I enjoyed a lot with them.One day when you accept yourself as you are you will meet a real and good partner. Why you don't talk to a psychologist and then invite your mother once to visit together so you can talk with her about your sexual interest

Answer 8

hey, dude..you don't need to be worried.

i was thinking about this when i was as young as you are. now i get it over...

suicide is the worst choice, because you will miss a lot of exciting things and romance.

see, i 'm a chinese girl, and i'm a lesbian. my mother must hate gay people 100 times more than your mother. Chinese people are very close-minded in this problem.

but when i'm 20, i went to university, i found my girl friend, of course, my mother don't know that...i'm happy now.


when you find your partner, you will find the reality is easier than before, you get more courage and love.

you can face the real world with him...

and with no doubt, you will find a man who loves you very much.

everyone has a man\woman like this...

all you can do is finding and waiting...

take your time, you are so young now~

maybe your man just overslept...

he is late but he will be there anyway...

Answer 9

Ahh, man. I really don't like hearing this. I just found out the statistics on teen suicide and one third of them are gay. Don't go there. Its not worth it. Your mom probably already suspects it anyways. My mom always knew since I was in my diapers. According to her I got my dad demons. Figure that sh!t out. But seriously. I bet you are a beautiful person. I finally came out at 31. Don't waste precious time. Live life to its fullest potential. It's all about you.

Answer 10

Relax, and don't let that be your only focus. I think i would ease your mom into it, by opening up a conversation the next time she speaks badly of homosexuals. Just ask her, "Mom, do you really have a problem with gay people, or is that just a habit.?" Go from there. See what she has to say.