Stillborn babies??

Question

Hi everyone, I was just wondering if their was anyone who delivered a stillborn baby that would like to share their story. I delivered a still born baby on june 14 2005 and I struggled with clinical depression and developed an eating disorder. I am working with a psychologist and a dietician and everything is slowly getting better but I find now that summer has arrived again there are certain shows that come on or certain activities that make me remember the cruel reality of the whole situation and time of year, and just make me want to run and hide. It has been the hardest thing I have ever experienced in my life and I am happy to say it has got easier to deal with but I was just wondering for all the women who have experienced this does it ever get easier around that time of year? please I need some sort of reassurance that this is not as good as it gets. I do no that it will hurt every year that goes by, knowing what should have been but do I have anything to look forward to?

that was really uncalled for, you did not have to respond if you didn't like the question, I just hope you never have to go through because there is more to it than to just get over it.

Answer 1

My condolences to you. I know what you are going through. My baby lived just 20 hours. I never had the chance to hold him, as he was whisked away to another hospital for surgery. Unfortunately, it was too late.
Will you ever get over it completely? No. You won't -- but you already suspected that much. What you can do to help yourself is to be prepared, and try, when his birthday comes around each year, to give yourself a stress free day. Take a day off if you can, go for a walk, visit a garden, and allow yourself to think, and remember. In your case, you can remember how it felt when he moved inside you. You can remember the hopes, and the dreams. You can use this day to make a special gesture -- plant a flower in your garden, or better yet, take flowers to the hospital for a patient who never has any visitors. The hospital chaplain can tell you who it is. Give the flowers anonymously. Or volunteer to help a group of handicapped children. Make that your gift to your child. Doing something for somene else is one of the best things you can do for yourself. And hopefully you will have other children, that you will help to grow, to learn and to achieve their fullest potential.
Again, my heart goes out to you. I share your sorrow. I hope you can share my healing process and that it will bring peace to you.

Answer 2

I can totally relate I lost twins in the fifth month and I was devastated. You have lost your child, a very real person in your life. Other people don't understand because they don't understand the relationship a mother has with the baby growing insider her. The first year is probably the hardest. Keep a journal and write in it. Do things special for you to remember the baby. Write a letter to the baby. Give God your heavy pain as you can't carry it. Sometimes we think we did something wrong and we don't forgive ourselves for that. You have to forgive yourself now. Pour out your heart to God, let him have all your pain and sorrow. He wants to hear from you. Bless you and I know it will get better because you've already been through the worst of it.

Answer 3

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Is there a support group in your area that you could go to with other women who have experienced such a loss. I know that its hard when things keep reminding you what happened. Its good to talk to others about what you are feeling.

Answer 4

i'm sorry to hear that you had to go through that. i can't imagine going through that myself. i hope things turn out better and if try praying to God about your burdens and your sadness, He will give you the strength to continue on and deal with your loss. Hope you will have beautiful babies one day. Good luck.

Answer 5

Time heals all things.













You have suffered a loss and grieving is a natural process. None of us grieve the same. It takes time.

Answer 6

This is the hardest thing you ever had to do? Come on.. buck up. Its a miscarriage, just because you spat it out late doesnt change the fact. Life goes on. You have to see a dietician because your a fat, emotinal piece of sh1t. You blame your problems on things that happen to you. This can hardly be the worse thing that has ever happened to you. Just do it.

Answer 7

sorry!