and it's all to do with the fact that I don't treat his dogs like humans! I love him with all my heart and soul, but he can't accept the fact that I think of animals as animals! He wants me to think of his dogs as human, and if I don't, he's going to divorce me and sell the house!
2006-07-11 13:13:23 · 33 answers · asked by sekhtet 3 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Wow, we have some real winners on here, don't we? Check out pop_star_dj 's answer! Some people (a child, no doubt!) just haven't got a clue about how life works in the real world, do they?
2006-07-12 09:46:36 · update #1
What I am actually hearing here is somewhat of a cop out on your husbands part. It sounds quite infantile to base your love for someone on whether or not they love animals or not, or treat them like humans. I would venture to guess that there are some other issues going on here and your husband may not be honest with you, this is just my guess. I mean, does he expect you to "obey" him as much as his dog does? I don't know how you two communicate, but I can say that when someone gives such a rigid ultimatum like that, then there must be some other factors to explore. Besides, are you always going to have to defend everything that you do just because he doesn't see it your way, particularly something as insignificant as whether or not you treat animals like humans? It just sounds juvenile to me, but obviously the choice is yours and you have a lot of choices here, some may not be as good as other, but they are choices, nevertheless.
2006-07-11 15:07:55 · answer #1 · answered by deepthinker 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First, couples counseling. Second, have you tried to understand his point of view? Really get into the nitty gritty of it? Third, do you yell your point of view? Do you get defensive first thing? Does he? These are all signs of non-communication. Counseling can help as it will give you both a non-judgemental place to talk. I would also suggests the 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families as well as alot of talking. Don't fight. Don't yell. Don't judge. If you married and he had dogs, there was something there that made your view ok. What was it? And can you get it back? I pray for the best and hope this is the real reason he wants a divorce. Tho, one can never be sure........
2006-07-11 13:19:25 · answer #2 · answered by Ananke402 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is it really about the dogs?
I don't think so..The problem is most likely deeper than your treatment of the dogs..
How you treat animals does reflect how you tend to treat people Question is how do you treat hubby?
.Apparently hubby loves his dogs and a person who loves animals can't be all bad..
Have a serious heart to heart talk with hubby.If you are unable to effectively communicate consider marriage counseling.Sounds like your marriage has problems.
2006-07-12 16:42:49 · answer #3 · answered by prettycoolchick38 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious? What man would do that? Did he really say he does not love you? Because if he did and if he does not love you then I understand how you feel. But him not loving you has nothing to do with the way you treat his dogs. How can it be related? I feel very sorry for you. That is such a mean thing to say but if that really is the way he feels then you will be better off and I know it's sounds unreal right now but you will meet someone who will love you and put you before his dogs.
2006-07-11 13:21:11 · answer #4 · answered by Mana 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's so sad. I can feel your pain. But you need to ask yourself: Shouldn't I be number one for him? Shouldn't the dogs be number 2? If he loves the dogs more than you, then maybe tell him to go ahead and sell the house, take his dogs, divorce you and maybe he can talk and communicate with his dogs the rest of his life.
2006-07-11 13:19:00 · answer #5 · answered by Pandak 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think anyone who seriously answers this question believes the matter is that simple or that clear cut.
Is there something you are not telling/saying?
Give at least three examples of how your husband wants you to treat the dogs that is causing so much of a challenge between the two of you in your marriage.
This is not a complete question...somethings amiss...
2006-07-11 14:06:24 · answer #6 · answered by marnefirstinfantry 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would call him on it...get divorced. Don't yell, don't judge, don't fight...just call the lawyer and get it over with.
Its amazing how women put up with crap like this.
What he is essentially implying is that you are an animal.
If I was married and a woman said this, I would be divorce the next day. No ifs ands or buts.
Ask yourself "Am I an dog?"
2006-07-11 13:19:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I HAVE 2 THINGS YOU COULD DO....
Option A:listen to me for just a minute, IF HE IS WILLING TO DIVORCE U FOR SOMETHING THAT STUPID, HE IS NOT WORTH UR TIME. if he really will divorce you and sell your house because you do not treat his dogs like ppl, then like whatever.
Option B: or if you really really love him and you don't want to get divorced, try having a conversation about reasons why you don't think of them as human. ask him why this is so important to him. try to work it out and ask him if he is actually willing to end your marriage because of a silly thing such as this.
2006-07-11 13:21:45 · answer #8 · answered by beanakopita 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is right. Most dogs are better then most people. It's because of animal and nature hatures like you the planet looks the way it does
2006-07-11 15:42:08 · answer #9 · answered by trollmannen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's trying to manipulate you into taking care of his dogs. Tell him to lie next to the dogs at night instead of you. You deserve better! Your spouse should be the priority over anything else that's the person you're supposed to share your life with.
2006-07-11 15:03:36 · answer #10 · answered by honey27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋