The questions that are bugging the life out of me - please help with either helpful or amusing answers!!?

Question

If you can't answer all three then 1 good answer will do. And yes I know it's cheating asking three at once but I'm tired and I want to go to bed so it's quicker to type all three in one go!

1)What is the problem with ID cards - if people have nothing to hide why is having one a problem - surely we have just as much info on our drivers licence? Maybe I don't understand enough about the issue which is where you come in!

2) Why does my daughters father bother contacting her once a year - he promises the earth (like regular contact, outings etc) and without fail lets her down and I have to pick up the pieces - she is 7 now and this has been going on for as many years. I just can't bear to see her getting hurt time and time again - it would be better if he didn't have any contact at all wouldn't it? What do you think - guys or girls, parents or not.
3) Why in the name of all that is holy is Mel B from the Spice Girls going out with Eddie Murphy? (A more irreverent question!)

Answer 1

1. I can't guess why this is a problem.
2. Maybe he just isn't up to the responsibility of being a parent (though he doesn't have a choice and should get it together oh, about seven years ago), but he knows he is supposed to be doing something. My father did this with me my whole life and I have terrible trust issues as an adult. (Also, no relationship at all with my father, by my choice.) No contact will be better because I can say from personal experience that it is hard going through life falling apart whenever anyone doesn't keep their word to you (imagine how often this happens, then imagine feeling like you are being punched in the stomach, every time).
3. Um, I'll take Hookups Between People Who Don't Realize Their 15 Minutes Ended in the Early 90s for $500?

Answer 2

ID cards

If they're talking about ID cards as they have in France they'll be like new passports, complete with finger print and picture of your eye. Be it for fraud/counter terrorism whatever it would make it kind of safer. Some people object for various reasons. My personal idea is that! I'd have no problem with one if i don't see why i should be charged for it when i already pay for my passport! My driving licence does give details such a my address, shows what i look like but then ... I'm told that lots of people walk about with fake driving licences thus ID card that cannot be (Not if someone does get you to not only stick your finger prints but also check your eye. However ... Give it a while and it won't be fool proof anymore. Someone will always find a way!

Your ex huband and daughter

I can undestand where you come from. Been there, done it ... To stop her seeing her father might result in recriminations later on, say in a few years time for instance. So best way would be not to tell her when he says he is coming you know! Keep it as a surprise so that she needn't know if he doesn't turn up, won't feel too hurt, and if he does turn up! She'll be delighted. Make a point of telling your ex husband that you are going to do so and maybe tell him that, and considering he has let her down a few times, it would be a better idea if he agreed with you on that one. Were you to stop access he might well take you to Court, or you could end up (Your daughter would) lke a young girl i know (Daughter's friend) Who found out that her mother had stopped visits and has now upped and left to live with her father! It will not last as he is not exactly the greatest father on earth but still ... You can imagine how her mum feels! So be careful!

Mel B and Eddie Murphy

Well i didn't know they were together! But if it's true love then good for them! Although ... True love isn't exactly the thing in Holywood is it?

Answer 3

1) Then if we pretty much all have drivers' licenses, why the redundancy for those of us who have them? By the way, probably every state already does have ID cards already, just not mandatory. In Ohio if you don't have a driver's license you can still get an ID card that looks just like a driver's license that still has all of your info on it. Just can't drive with it.

2) This is just a guess on my part......I'm a dad but no psychologist. I think she'd be better off without him. When she's older she can look him up if she wants to when he's old enough to regret his immature behavior.

3). I don't know, I don't know Mel. When Eddie Murphy was younger he was irreverent and crass. I think he has matured a great deal in the last 20 years, I think he has a bit of a sense of moral responsibility that he didn't have back in the day. The raciest thing he does now is Disney movies and he used to be foul. But I don't particularly see a down side in Eddie Murphy as a date. He's a fun, funny guy who loves to laugh.

Answer 4

try to do 2 out of 3 for you, first anyone who will not have an ID is up to no good as you say if they have nothing to hide whats the problem , I don't see an issue with ID cards i think they should be compulsory and anyone who refuse's should leave this country.
secondly i agree with you totally he should not and if he truly loved his daughter would not mess with a little girls head,she is at a very vulnerable age ,old enough to be hurt too young to be able to understand why, tell him to stay away from her.

Answer 5

I am not familiar with the problem in number one. Number 2, because not everyone is nice and responsible. But maybe you can help her not set her hopes high from now on if daddy promises something, I know it is extra work for you to care for her and him instead of helping, apparantly making things worse. But, you seem like you care about her, and she is lucky for that. I don't think cutting her off from her dad is a good idea, though, girl will need to still see her dad whenever circumstances permit, otherwise she might blame mom in the future for keeping her from her dad. As long as their meetings go ok, when they happen, and may be you can help make sure they go ok. And I am sorry, but I am not interested in answering 3.

Answer 6

You are right about the ID card thing -- we essentially already have it since we have social security numbers.

As for your daughter, unfortunately, that's the job of a lot of moms. Myself included. However, as kids grow they begin to see the other parent for what they really are, and the child becomes grateful for what you did.

I know! The Mel B thing is weird. Maybe she looks better when she isn't being scary! Or maybe she has a good personality. Creepy if you ask me!

Answer 7

#2 i wasn't a very good dad for quite a long time for two main reasons. 1.I had a real serius drink problem so when drunk I would ring her mum and arrange to see my daughter then forget or just be too pissed to have her. 2.I would be riddled with guilt for letting her down and couldn't face her so this became a vicious circle.I also think I associated my daughter with the bad memories of the relationship I had with her Mum.
I am glad to say now that I have her every weekend without fail and we both look forward to it She's 14 now and she's really proud that I was able to stop drinking.It's true when people like Oprah say you cant have a proper relationship with anyone if you have one with drink/drugs.So in answer to your question you must be patient try to explain to your ex how upset your daughter gets but in a calm matter of fact way.Tell him to get his priorites in order cos she wont be a little girl forever and she will remember these things and if he aint careful it will come and smack him in the face! enough rambling...hope that helps

Answer 8

1) ID cards gives the government (and hackers) so much of your personal details that you could be watched 24 hours a day. I've nothing to hide but I dont trust anyone with all my details.
2) Your husband is a cold piece of sh*t but he has a guilty conscience and also probably a family he needs to tell he still contacts his daughter.
3)She'll go out with anybody now...she needs the publicity

Answer 9

I'll take a stab at #1...

All Governments derive their authority from somewhere. For much or recorded history, governments claimed that God had granted them the right to rule. Those government then deign to allow their subjects certain liberties.

The Declaration of Independence laid out a different framework. It specifies that each individual person is endowed by their creator (God) with certain inalienable rights. Men then create governments among themselves, and grand those governments certain powers.

In the United States, the government is the servant of the people, and must answer to them. You do not need an I.D. card in the U.S., because you are not their subject, not their servant.

Answer 10

1.the fact that ppl already carry so much id wiv them already - theres drivers licences, passports, citizen cards...oh & ud have 2 pay 4 them - thats not fair, itd b better if the gov paid & besides BIG BROTHER - do u want him knowing where u r @ all times?
in theory id cards r a good idea, id carry 1, but they have 2 b cost effective, & eventually, overide other id so 1 card is all u need

2.yes, it would b better if he didnt - get rid of this loser b4 he hurts your daughter ne further - @ the end of the day, its how a guy treats ur child that determines if hes her father, not genes!(not a parent btw)

3.wot the....?REALLY??!!i thought he was happily married??!!