Why do 'some' Christians see gay marriage as shoving gay rights in their face?

Question

I was told this in a different question.

Gay marriage is a matter of equal rights from the state. Straight couples so willingly accept special rights when they marry (ie, taxes, next of kin, inheritance laws, healthcare benefits, etc...) but are fussing that we want the same? Explain that one to me.

We will gladly withdraw our argument/protest if heteorsexual couples will give up their marriage special rights by the states. You can still be married in your churches and be recognized there.. just no more special rights bythe state just for straight couples.

Answer 1

thank you for use the word "some", i don't think that gay marriage should even be an issue, the constitution was set so that the government could not dictate personal beliefs or actions as long as they are not criminal. being homosexual is not criminal so why shouldn't you be aloud to marry. its your civil right.

Answer 2

That's a tough question. I think that a lot of people have a hard time separating the civil contract which is legal marriage in the U.S., and the marriage ceremony which often takes place in the sactuary of a church and is officiated over by a clergy person. This is further compounded by the fact that the various states recognize and authorize these clergy to act as agents of the state in this official capacity.

But most of us as gay and lesbian people want the civil contract called "marriage" open to us. Once that happens, we will find a church who is willing to hold a ceremony for us, or we'll use a Judge or Justice of the Peace (do ship captains still qualify?). While we may work within our own individual churches or denomination of churches to change their policies on the inclusion of GLBT people on all levels, including marriage, we don't intend to tell any given church that they have to marry us. We would like to tell the state of (Fill in the blank with your state) that they have to marry us!

Answer 3

Some 'christians' refuse to accept the separation of church and state. Some of these folks want our public tax-supported schools to espouse one religion over all the rest as well, and have them discuss "creationism" in the same breath as actual science.

Your arguments are good ones. It's difficult when arguments about understanding, tolerance, justice and equality go up against a belief system. Obviously the former should win.

Good luck!

Answer 4

It’s all about money. Government money. As you said Taxes( I agree with you on that one. No one should get a tax break just because they are married. They get one for each child and couples with no children don’t deserve a break over the rest of us.) Next of kin and inheritance can be done with a will. Health care is between you and the health care provider and NOT the government. So if we take away the government money this thing will just go away all by it’s self.

Answer 5

Straight people think marriage as a sacred vow before God. Just look at Brittney Spears. Very sacred huh? But anyway, they think that if gay folks can marry then it will "taint" their view of marriage. Of course the special rights are important - but I think gay (and straight) people would still get married - even if all the special rights were removed. People still get married for Love, don't they?

Answer 6

If marriage is so special and sacred, why aren't heterosexuals treating it as such. We see a barrage of divorces, out of wed children, infidelity and spouses killing each other. If gays can't get married, then heterosexuals shouldn't be allowed to have sex outside their marriage. Forced to pay and raised children outside of marriage; no abortion; never to have sex with anyone unless its their spouse.

It's funny how many people will argue against that notion, because it infringes on their personal choices and yet not see the harm and danger of their own hypocrisy.

Answer 7

Excuse me, different county heard from:

I support governmental recognition of all marriages performed by recognized religious group, and that is the secret about the gay marriage question.

The gay marriage fight is really a battle between two groups of religious denominations - Christian and other in both cases. That battle is being missed by the media, and I believe that the battle threatens democracy in America.

One of the reasons for the Revolution, in which ancestors of mine fought -- was to establish freedom of religion in the new nation. Now, we are throwing that away, because contrary to what those on the Right would like you to think, this is not a battle between "people of faith" and "atheists" or some such -- this is a battle between two groups of people of faith, using the government to establish one side’s views -- the EXACT THING that the anti-establishmentarian clause of the Constitution is there to prevent.

Of course no one should "make" those whose faiths oppose gay marriage perform such marriages, and no one ever would. So ministers from the Southern Baptists and Assemblies of God and Ultra-Orthodox Jews and Fundamentalist Muslims should never be asked to perform gay marriages, and certainly not forced to.

On the other hand, why should faith groups that support gay marriage -- such as the United Church of Christ, the Unitarian/Universalist Society, the North American Spiritualist Church, Reform Judaism, and the Correllian Tradition of Wicca -- all recognized Churches and 501c3s be barred from practicing their religious faiths, which say it is ok to marry same sex couples?

The first group of faith groups is realistically using the government to prevent the second group of faith groups from practicing what they believe and having it legally recognized. The founders tried to prevent this, for the stability of the country. It doesn't matter that everyone "thinks" they are right and others are wrong -- it matters that we are plural as a society and the government should recognize everyone's ceremonies the same -- which means that gay marriages committed by churches and faith groups that believe in gay marriages, should be honored by the government regardless of what groups that don't like it say.

Everyone's beliefs can be honored, thus preserving the values that my 12 times removed Great Grandfather died for -- but not if we allow one side to legislate away the rights of the other side.

Since I do not believe the government should be used to control religious belief -- I think that the government should recognize gay marriage, when performed by members of clergy -- and should create a civil union equivalent for those interested only in secular marriage.

Otherwise we should stop saying we don't have an establishment of religion.

Regards,

Reynolds Jones
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

PS To Strong Beautiful Queen -- Your words are kind, and I am going to speak now not as a gay man but as an active member of another denomination.

Out of respect for other churches, including some that fought VERY HARD as part of the abolitionist movement in the 1800s, one of which I belonged to for a number of years -- PLEASE DO NOT PRETEND THAT ALL CHRISTIANS AGREE ON THIS. Your statement ignores the fact that essentially the same congregations that denied the authority of the scripture verses that support slavery (and such verses are there, I can give you a list if you'd like -- and would be happy to, email me at the address below in my signature block), supported the underground railroad and actively functioned as abolitionists, and then supported equality for women in the decades following the civil war --- today support equality for gays -- including gay marriage. To us, JUSTICE is the ultimate goal. As his Gracious Eminence the Bishop of Oxford (Anglican) said in a speech two years ago -- "we have gotten beyond the text on the idea of slavery, we have gotten beyond the text on the issue of women, and now, finally, we are getting beyond the text on the issue of homosexuality."

I agree with his eminence, and so do millions of other Christians in this country -- have the courtesy to not think to speak for us.

Thank you.

Reyn
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

Answer 8

(We) Christians believe that marriage is God's holy institution (Malachi 2:11) based on the Word of our God, the Bible (any version your choose of the canonnical Word will have that scripture). Marriage does not belong to the state. It is a covenant that belongs to God. Christians are not working to keep you in bondage, and unable to enjoy rights. But from our perspective, we are simply doing everything we can to keep you from hurting yourself in the long run. It may not be believable to you, but...for some of us the inequality as you see it is actually being done out of love for you. I know that sounds rediculous...but think about it : if you saw a blind man walking into the middle of the street you might have to hurt him in order to help him, right? no offense but you're like that blind man...we may have to hurt you in order to help you. It's not that we're purposely just out to hurt you (at least not the real Christians), we're actually sincerely trying to keep you from hurting yourself. You're made in the image of God just like we are. Once you see yourself as holy and righteous...maybe then you'll want to change a few things in your life. Anyway, I hope I've shed some light into this matter for you. God loves you, and so do I.

Answer 9

Honestly, as a straight person, I don't understand why gay marriage is controversial.

Gay people should be allowed to do whatever straight people are allowed to do. Otherwise, it's discrimination, pure and simple.

Answer 10

I think it can be encapsulated in this quote by Bruce Bawer, a gay Christian author: "But for some Christians- many of whom, curiously enough, think of themselves as evangelicals- God's love just isn't any fun unless you can find somebody else to deny it to."