i want to get married and have a kid, but my boyfriend doesnt want to. we love eachother, and he says he wants these things, but wants me to wqait till i am like 30 till we do any of this. i think that having a kid and getting married will bring us closer and help us out. why doesnt he want to walk the walk and all he does is talk the talk. how do i get him to listen to me?
2006-07-11 09:00:33 · 17 answers · asked by luvly_lady3426 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
having a kid will not bring you closer if there are problems in the relationship and if one person is not readya nd you force them it will not last, talk with him and find out his reasons i'm sure he has some.
2006-07-11 09:03:50 · answer #1 · answered by mimismom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey just because you get married doesn't mean he will be closer to you.Look at all the people who cheat or get a divorce.He just isn't ready for all that yet.Guys are not like us,They need a lot of time to grow up.Or maybe he wants to be sure he has a good job and can provide for you and the kid that the 2 of you will have.
2006-07-11 16:40:34 · answer #2 · answered by TinkerBell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're ready to have a child when its for the right reasons. Like whether or not you and the father stay toguether you don't care you'll love this baby and fight to give him the best life possible. If you really want this and you can't wait for him to make up his mind then talk to him and be honest with him and tell him that to be happy you need a marriage and a family. If you can't come to a compromise maybe that's a sign that you need to move on.
2006-07-11 16:35:15 · answer #3 · answered by honey27 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your boyfriend is telling you he doesn't want to get married or have children ,you don't want someone who doesn't want the same things out of life as you do. You are going to be waiting a long time.Children don't bring you closer you have to be on the same page about your future together ,make sure you both want the same thing.You don't want a forced marriage or children in the end you will regret it .
2006-07-11 21:06:04 · answer #4 · answered by Kay D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK.. hmm.. well he is obviously not ready. Him wanting to wait till you're 30 is an excuse. That sucks that he put it on you. I'm under 30 and my husband says things to make me feel bad about my age. Don't let him make you feel like it's your fault. It is HIM. If he's ready ..he'd do it. I have a bro. like this. Try to get busy and lay off the subject with him. Face it.. he just isn't ready.
2006-07-11 16:06:42 · answer #5 · answered by LJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WRONG. Being married and having children will not always bring you together. It can tear you apart if you are not ready.
Second, are ya leaving together? And if so are you ALREADY acting like his wife. Cooking and cleaning. Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free. Think about
Plus be with someone that share you dreams. Don't force it. He might not YOUR HUSBAND. Ask God for guidance.
2006-07-11 16:06:08 · answer #6 · answered by RONNIEKAT 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he's not ready yet. Turn the table for a min what if he wanted this & you didn't & he kept on & on with you like you do him I think you would understand better. Some men aren't ready for a long time & I've been there done that trust me .
2006-07-11 16:59:32 · answer #7 · answered by Fun girl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Would you like someone to force you to do something that you don't want to do? Well, he doesn't like it either,
Marriage and children is a big responsability, he is not ready for it and he has clearly stated it,
If you are readym then find someone that is emotionally and financially ready to start a family.
Good luck
2006-07-11 16:07:40 · answer #8 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think he is right, waiting till you are thirty is perfect, you will have finished college and started a new job and saving for a new house to have your marriage.why not wait, why not listen to him, maybe he is thinkig ahead and you arent. maybe he is planning a big thing for you and him. think about it.he doesnt want to do it now , why not wait and save moeny for the wedding you want.right wouldnt that be good.
2006-07-11 16:09:29 · answer #9 · answered by Christina 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
having a child will not bring you closer, it may put up some walls in fact! especially if he is not ready. maybe you should start looking at other things that he will not commit too and see if your dealing with someone who just can't commit period!
2006-07-11 16:10:07 · answer #10 · answered by City slicker 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋