i have found atleast 4 pairs of womens underwear in my house in the last 3 months and i know its not cause he is cheating because i know whose underwear they are i have also found pictures of my female friends and family made into collages right along with the panties....how common is it for a married man to steal other womens underwear...im not bad looking i am 25 years old and 110 lbs we have a fairly active sex life and he has never asked anything odd or freakish of me he is not the player type and is fairly shy but we have been together for 11 years and married for 3 years..he says it has nothing to do with me but he cant seem to tell me why?? He has also developed a methamphetamine habit in the last year that i am dealing with as well and dont know if this type of behavior could be related to drug use or not ?? please help before i file for divorce i am extremely hurt by all of this!!!
2006-07-11 08:15:29 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That is a lot to sort out. There isn't any answers you will get on here that are going to provide the kind of assistance that you need. Please seek professional counseling. To me it seems like he has many issues that should be resolved.The fact that he has pictures with a large collage kind of scares me also. And don't even think that this has anything to do with you or how you look. This behavior is something he will have to work through with professional guidance. Best of luck to the both of you.:)
2006-07-11 08:26:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am not sure how common it is. I stole a pair once when I was in like 3rd grade because I liked how they felt. I can remember thinking of stealing others when I was older for more sexualy curious reasons rather than the feel of them. I never did though. I smell my wifes sometimes when I masturbate. I have never tried any methamphetamines.
If its the smell that attracts him, tell him where to put his nose :-)
Or even better, wear yours a bit longer so you have a pair that he can take. He is probably feeling quite a bit of shame surrounding this so you might just have a spot for him to find his special pair. Tell him that when he finds a pair in that spot that he can take them and it will be your little secret. Rotate a pair from time to time so he can always have a strong smelling pair. Tell him that stealing your panties is ok with you but not to take them from others.
2006-07-11 08:30:33 · answer #2 · answered by explicit_intents 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave the guy! theres alot of people out there that will treat you with respect..theres guys out there that only wish they could have someone to cherish. drop him girl! but on the underwear question..I've noticed that through my life of dating then marriage how guys will do that..i notice if I leave my underwear on the floor they will be moved or look as if they've been checkd out. I asked my first husband what the deal was..and he says it's a way for the man to make sure the women isn't cheating or cheating..by seeing if the panties have any sign of ***. Nasty but partly true..I'm sure there are other weird reasons. Good luck girl!
2006-07-11 08:32:28 · answer #3 · answered by justwonderingwhatever 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It may be more common that you think.
I had a friend whose husband did the exact same thing while she was pregnant. She was also an attractive woman, and it was very upsetting to her as well. She confronted him with it, but he just kept on doing it. He would steal women's dirty underwear from the laundry room of the apartment building they lived in. She would find them hidden everywhere in the house, and usually after he had used them to pleasure himself...gross!
Finally, one day she got sick and tired of it and when he came home from work and asked what was for dinner, she served him a plateful of all of the dirty underwear she had found recently.
After that, she never found another pair of womens' dirty underwear. lol!
About his drug habit...he needs to seek professional help as I doubt that it is related to his underwear theft.
Good Luck~*
2006-07-11 08:23:43 · answer #4 · answered by DG 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm it is NOT COMMON for any man to do this!! In fact, I would term it "weird" behaviour!!
Now, about the drug, it may be that its changing him and he is getting weird ideas because of it... But, being on a self destructive mode as he is, this may be his way of "losing the best thing that ever happened to him"...YOU!
He may be trying to tell you in his own way, (hoping you would find all this weird stuff), that he is giving you a way "out" of the marriage.
He is in a downhill slide and its moving faster every moment of the day...
If you truley love him, get him into a drug rehabilitation center and support him in every way possible.
Toss out those silly things, (since he didnt have an affair, its his way of crying for help), and forget about it...
Once he is clean, and can think rationally then this incident will be an embarrasement to him, every time you bring it up.
But, if he DOES have a fetish of some sort, you will know, after he has gone through treatment and starts this wierdness up again, then its your decision on what action to take...
I wish you well..
Jesse
2006-07-11 08:23:21 · answer #5 · answered by x 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can understand why you are hurt. That really sucks. I also know that people that do meth have a sex problem. Meaning that they are always horny and want to have sex. So maybe depending who he is getting high with, he is having sex with all them women. Plus who knows where them women have been. Be careful that he doesn't bring anything home to you. I wouldn't trust him. I would tell him how you feel and the consequences, but it's hard to stop and if he doesn't really want to stop, he won't. Keep that in mind. Good luck!
2006-07-11 08:29:05 · answer #6 · answered by Susa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy sounds like he has some serious issues including the drug use. If he's not ready to get help for himself then you need to move on with your life. You're young and have alot of good years ahead of you.
2006-07-11 08:28:50 · answer #7 · answered by Phillip B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me like you have a mad man living with you, only pervs steal womens panties, the drugs should be another clear sign it is time to get on downthe road, this guy is changing to fast, who knows what he will do next, get out while the getting is good.
2006-07-11 08:20:43 · answer #8 · answered by citisat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, stealing panties is the last thing you have to worry about if he's hooked on meth! Get him into treatment ASAP! Things will get better from there.
2006-07-11 08:24:10 · answer #9 · answered by John_n_Tracy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I steal womens undies only to wear them on my head. I enjoy the heady smell of a womans skidmarks.
2006-07-11 08:18:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋