Me and my fiance decided that we wanted a kid.. Well after we were done having sex he started to act scared to be a daddy.. and i tryed to talk to him bout it but i dont know what to say to him or do.. we are both a lil under 18.. And i have a job and he is inthe process of becoming a rapper he is signing the papers in bout a week.,... what should i do try to have a kid or what.. and how should i talk to him bout it....
2006-07-11 06:51:45 · 22 answers · asked by Sammi 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
HE says that he wants one also so we will stay together like having a baby will tie the knot
2006-07-11 07:01:29 · update #1
frankly he has a right to be scared. you both are really too young to be parents. raising a child is tough and expensive. I doubt you are in your career yet. There is alot to think about other than how cute babies are.
What happens if he doesn't make it as a rapper?
Does he have anything else to fall back on?
Do you own your own home?
Are you married to him?
Have you even graduated high school?
If he does become a rapper are you going to want to sit home with the baby while he's out at gigs?
And why do you want to have a baby anyway? Is it to keep him tied to you? Or is it because you want to be parents and give all your love to a child.
These are things you should do before you worry about having kids. You both have some serious thinking to do.
2006-07-11 06:58:50 · answer #1 · answered by Brandie C 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I understand both of you are engaged and everything, and having baby is very exciting, but i would wait for a bit! He's got his rapping career and stuff. You both are still quite young, honestly, enjoy it!
My husband and I have been married for alittle over a year, he's 23 and I'm 21 and we are having our first baby in January! We are both very excited and nervous at the same time!
It's normal, but you have no idea how much i wish we still had a little more time to have it just be us! To go where ever we want, and do whatever we want!
Once you have a baby, it's harder to travel places and do things! YOu can't just take off, you have to plan a lot of stuff before hand!
My advice is to just enjoy each others company for now, there is plently of time for babies soon! Once those babies come you don't get anymore husband wife time (well as much as before) You are raising kids 24/7 for at least the next 18 years!
It's a huge responsibility, and I'm not saying you can't handle it, just enjoy being young and do all sorts of fun things and then settle down and start a family!
I know it's hard to wait, but it'll be the best thing you ever did!
Then you guys will be a little more prepared and feel a little more mature and ready to take on that responsibility!
Good Luck!
2006-07-11 13:59:44 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, it is not guaranteed that you are pregnant (it has to be during your fertile days and within the range of you ovulating). Second, I dont think either one of you are old enough to be trying to have a baby. You having a "job" is not going to be much help when you have to quit your job to have this baby and take care of it. You need to have a CAREER that will provide you with maternity leave and all the other benefits (medical, etc) that come with having a REAL job. Also, I would DEFINITLY not depend on your boyfriend for financial support....being a "rapper" is a VERY unstable career until you become a major, well-known...and that is HIGHLY unlikely for most people!! I think you should both stop trying to have kids, and continue your education so that you can get a real job and be able to provide for a baby later in life! Good Luck, but I would stop trying to have a kid, and if you are going to have sex, USE PROTECTION!!!!
2006-07-11 14:02:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Settle down first. You really need to wait a little bit longer to have a baby. I don't really think that his whole heart is in yet. Give it a month or year and see how you and he feel at that time. What is the rush btw?? If you don't like living at home you can always move out. You are old enough to do anything you want to do. A baby will only complicate your life and his. Let him reach stardom and you suceed at whatever you want to do and then have babies when you are ready for them.
2006-07-11 13:57:11 · answer #4 · answered by sarah a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Guuuurrrllllllll, i am 30 years old. I am pregnant w/my first child. I can honestly say that I am ready to devote my LIFE to my kid, now, at 30 years old. I know for a fact that I would have been a horrible mom if I would have had my child any earlier. You aren't even 21 yet! You haven't even experienced the "Club" yet! girl, you need to wait like i did! I am all done partying, i'm soooooo glad i waited! I can't wait to meet my baby. I can give her everything and WANT to. At 17 years old, you really don't Want that, but if it happens, you will HAVE to and you will resent that poor kid or worse yet, your child will resent you when she/he gets older because you pawned her/him off on everyone so you could enjoy life. Just wait girl. Trust me!
2006-07-11 14:03:54 · answer #5 · answered by Brooke's Mommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously he isn't ready for a baby... don't rush. You guys should wait until you are married. He is just starting his rapping career, and you both have a lot to look forward to.
Babies are wonderful, but extremely time consuming. You're young... enjoy spending time together... just the two of you!!! Travel, have fun and do the things you enjoy before you have to spend all your time and money taking care of someone else.
2006-07-11 14:06:28 · answer #6 · answered by .·:*RENE*:·. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
NOOOO! When in doubt....do without. You have an entire life time to have children. Why not wait until you can provide a child with two married stable parents in a stable home. Mature parents that will be able to make mature decisions. Live your life while you are young. Don't rush it. There is plenty of time!
2006-07-11 13:56:48 · answer #7 · answered by #3ontheway! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say wait!!! Things change so much in the next 10 years of your life and normally couples your age don't last. So unless you want to be a single parent, wait. Also, if he is showing any signs of fear now...don't have a baby with him now.
2006-07-11 14:47:48 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If one of you is unsure of being a parent, then you don't need to be making a baby. Get on birth control and wait until the time is right for both of you.
2006-07-11 13:57:45 · answer #9 · answered by tricksy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh boy your under 18??? thats not good, if you really want to have a kid wait until your like 22 so you can have some fun, and if you're planning on going to college and getting an education wait until after. i guarantee you will probably regret having kids now, so wait!
2006-07-11 15:09:49 · answer #10 · answered by guess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋