What are the common elements to determining if the person you're communicating has HEARD you correctly?

Question

Example: Communication is a two way street ... Fred tells Jane its going to snow. What did Jane hear? Did she hear, "Blah-Blah-Blah", or "Snow, Fun, Joy-Joy", or "I should wear a warmer coat". So, how would Fred know how Jane interpreted his statement?

What common elements of communicating should Fred do to determine if he got his message to Jane correctly?

Answer 1

Eye contact and a quick responce to the comment or question. if you dont have any of those actions take place chances are they did not hear you clearly.

Answer 2

Observation. If she grabs a jacket then that would clearly confirm if she heard Fred or not.

Eye contact. When communicating with someone, eye contact is important between two people because it lets one another know that they are paying attention (or at least pretending to).

Repeating the question. If there is no reply during communication, then Fred should repeat the question in case Jane did not hear. Or have Jane repeat Freds' question back to him.

One voice at a time. Communication is not used well when two people are talking at the same time. Energy is wasted and nothing is heard.

For example: When I am in a middle of a debate, I sometimes speak very low and softly (i almost whisper) so that the other person would HAVE to tone down to actually hear what I am saying.

Answer 3

I have this problem with my kids a lot - sometimes with hubby too. One of the big issues is often someone will try to pass information while someone else is occupied- later person A will say, "I told you that" and person B will say" you never said that"
It takes a little extra time and effort- something that many people dont care to offer these days, but a few things we do around our home to improve communication and make sure we aree understood is:

#1 before you start talking to someone, especially when giving information, make sure you ahve the person's attention - if they are watching tv, using the computer, or trying to concentrate or think on something else, you are not going to be heard.

#2 ask a question regarding what you are talking about- don't just give info and run- make the conversation interactive, by the other persons respnse oyu should be able to gether whether they understood you or not and whether or not your message got through. this gives you a chance to clarify and be sure you are understood before you take off and assume you have been heard.

#3 the listener, whether asked or not, should repeat back the gist of the information given, this way they know they have heard correctly and will not be misled by a misunderstanding- the listener should ask questions to make sure that the important parts of what was said are correctly understood , that they heard the other person correctly and to assure the other person that the message was received.

#4 both parites should be careful to keep the sarcasm out and be aware of their tone and body language when speaking, often if we are frustrated with one thing, it will pour out in other areas and we wind up offending someone or making them think we have issue with them, no faster way to close up someone's ears to what you want them to hear than to come at them with a bad attitude, snotty tone or sarcasm- not only will you not be heard but generally you will wind up closing your ears to the response. Open, clear and concise conversation requires respect from the speaker and the listener .

Answer 4

You are entirely correct in stating that communication is a two-way street.

When you take communications classes, whether they are for oral communication or written communication, they tend to drill a certain technique into your head, which basically can be summed up as:

Tell them what you are going to tell them, then tell them, then tell them what you just told them.

For example, in the above example, Fred could say: "Jane, it's going to snow. Be sure to drive carefully and take your coat with you, because you never can be sure what will happen when it's snowing." He needs to be very clear in explaining why he is making the statement that it is going to snow.

The same thing is easy to observe in a correctly written thesis paper: You open with an introduction that explains your main thesis, you provide the information that backs up your thesis, and then you summarize what you just said and why the information backs up your original thesis.

Ideally, Jane takes the time to be an active listener, which means that she restates not only what she heard, but what she understood. That way, if she didn't get the point of why Fred was telling her about the snow, he can clarify his position.

Another part of this whole process is that people should, ideally, ask for clarification if they are unsure about any of the information that is communicated to them. It is perfectly acceptable for Fred to mention, if he hasn't made it clear in his original statement, why he is warning Jane about the snow. It is also perfectly fine for Jane, if she is not clear on things, to ask for clarification. Unfortunately, many people either don't know how, or don't care to take the time to be good communicators.

The best bet if you are the one actually delivering the information is to do what I mentioned above: tell them what you are going to tell them, then tell them, then tell them what you just told them. That way it's pretty clear, at least to someone who is paying attention, what your real statement is. You are right, Jane could be thinking, "Oh goody, I get to go skiing!" or "Darn, I will have to shovel the driveway," when what Fred is actually trying to communicate is the dangers of driving around out in the snow.

Often, you can skip the important stuff if you know the person with whom you are speaking really well, and if it is a pretty basic statement of fact. For instance, when my husband tells me it is going to snow, I know him well enough to know that what he is really saying includes all sorts of other stuff, including, "Take your coat and your phone, be careful of other drivers, use the 4-wheel drive if you need to, watch out for black ice, etc..." More important topics demand more active communication on the part of both participants, as does communication with people one knows less well.

To communicate most effectively, Fred and Jane must both realize that they are engaged in a mutual process, and that clarity and understanding are the goals they should be going for. Using good, active communications skills should help them achieve those goals.

Answer 5

Well....if someone is talking to a girl, it will be "oh, it's going to snow....I better wear warm clothes...do I have a sweater clean? Did anyone start the dryer last night...? Doesn't anyone do anything around here except for me??" If you ask a guy it will be "blah blah blah"

Answer 6

Ask concept checking questions. Eg: What's it going to do? Did it snow yesterday? etc. We study this in courses on Modern Teaching.

Answer 7

Well, usually i communicate in morse code with a hammer. If the person is unconcious i know i got my point across.

Answer 8

Have Jane repeat back what she heard, in her own words.

Answer 9

If that person is looking at you and likes you or thinks you are an important person then he or she will listen.
If that person is looking at you.
If that person is asking you about it.
If that person makes his/her comment about it.

Answer 10

ask! or make an other similar statement to verify