My husband and I have been married for almost 2 yrs now. We have a 6 month old girl. We are not separated as in marital status and I live in WV and he lives in MS. I want a place of my own and to be with him. I want my family complete as any wife would. He says he needs until December when his workers comp. case is over and he wins money so we can be together. that's a whole different story that doesn't involve the marriage. anyway, i went to MS last week to surprise him. Well, come to find out he cheated on me. I made him choose and she made him choose. He chose me and now that I'm home, I suspect he's with her again. I think since me and my baby girl was disrespected, he shouldn't have his "time". I need to find a way to move with him. He's coming in August to see us and to talk with a lawyer about his case. I want to go with him to philly and back to MS. I need some ideas on how we can first fix our marriage by being together. One mistake I made was not putting my foot down. HELP ME
2006-07-11 04:56:54 · 12 answers · asked by ? 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You definitely need to find a way to move - but not in with him - on with your life! Statistics show that once a person cheats the trust is gone in the marriage. You say he chose you - but you are already doubting him. Are you willing to stay in a marriage where you can't trust your spouse. Been there and tried that and it didn't work. You will start to feel like a jailer, he will resent you, and your self esteem will go into the toilet. Don't you feel like you deserve better? DO get a lawyer - but see them about making sure you get child support etc. This does not sound like a stand-up guy and you will never change him.
2006-07-11 05:07:04 · answer #1 · answered by arkiemom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Fixed marriages last longer than love marriages because in societies where you have fixed marriage divorce is usually totally out of the question or saved for really extreme cases. In many cases fixed marriage is more of a business or a deal than what we call "marriage" in our society. Sometimes love comes later and sometimes not, but the deal is usually not meant to be broken. I personally prefer love marriage with all its disadvantages.
2016-03-27 01:07:17 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you think that by being with him is going to keep him from cheating on you? Can you trust him again? If you want to fix this then you do need to be with him.Be careful,It sounds like you might get hurt again.Here is something that you might want to think about-What if he gets a STD while he is out there cheating on you? Thats not something you want.I hope you can fix your marriage and i wish you good luck.I know that i could not live with the fact that my husband cheated on me.Honey I would be getting a divorce if i was you.Once a cheater always a cheater.There would be no way i could ever trust him again.Without trust marriage is nothing.
2006-07-11 05:11:04 · answer #3 · answered by TinkerBell 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you still interested in being with him after he cheated on you. I think the reason he doesn't live with you is because he doesn't want to be marriage. Also is he even working? How is he supposed to take care of you are your baby girl? It sound like you should get some help for yourself first , then leave his ***!
2006-07-11 05:43:38 · answer #4 · answered by luckymom43 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow... lot going on there.
First, in order for your marriage to be fixed - it requires you both to commit to each other, not just you. If you aren't in agreement on that, then it won't work.
Second, you have a lot of disparities in your explanation. You also need to figure out what you want in the relationship. Honestly, with all the stuff going on, if you BOTH don't make a full-out commitment, it won't work.
2006-07-11 05:02:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is cheating on you when your only married to each other 2 years and have a young child its going to be a long struggle to trust him for the rest of your life don't you think???!!!!
2006-07-11 05:02:03 · answer #6 · answered by rainbow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let's see now you want help with becoming a doormat...nope can't do it. He chose you to be his doormat and you allowed him to. Frankly I would have allowed him to make the other woman his doormat and filed for divorce as soon as I got home. Oh and don't bet on him getting the workman's comp...that's iffy in itself.
2006-07-18 20:43:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you kidding me? This guy is a dirtbag. What is it that you think you can do to "fix" a cheating scumbag other than castration? You need to see that lawyer about alimony and child support.
2006-07-11 05:08:54 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you're right, the one mistake you made was "not putting your foot down".....now what are you gonna do?.....I rather think that's up to you.......if you want to keep yourself in this relationship then by all means, keep your foot "up".
2006-07-11 05:09:06 · answer #9 · answered by theoregonartist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you deserve better that what you are getting. Put you and your daughter first and leave him. If he cheated once he will or already is doing it again.
2006-07-11 05:41:10 · answer #10 · answered by buttseyeluv43 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋