i have in laws that hate my gut we had a big fight i want things to be a little normal for my husband's sake

Question

i hate them too but i want things to be a little better. my husband does'nt talk to them either what to do any ideas people

Answer 1

If neither of you talk to them, seems like the problem has solved itself.

If you are trying to get him to have a relationship with his parents where there isn't one, don't. He can do that himself if he wants to - trust me, it will go badly if you try to step in like that.

If they aren't speaking to each other because of you, well - you still have to let them resolve it between themselves. Your husband has to decide whether to try to make it work or stand alone. Either way, as long as they understand he is not going to abandon you, the best you can do is take the high road: Don't fight with them, keep your cool, never give in to their hatred, never give them any reason to hate you, and eventually they will simply look like fools for hating you.

Being nice to people who hate you is often quite fun - try it. Be sweet and kind as much as you can, but you have to really mean it. They will have less and less reason to hate you, so if they continue to do so, it's truly their problem. You'll also be amazed how freeing it is for you.

Answer 2

I've noticed that lots of daughters in law have problems with their in-laws. My theory is that women like to cause fights with in-laws so that they break the son away from his parents. Mothers in law are also really good at stirring up problems cause they want to hold on to little Johnny.

Try to calmly think about what it is that got you so upset with in-laws. If it's not really that big a deal, then just let it go.

Answer 3

great Stuff, Sir Thomas, only great Stuff! even in spite of the indisputable fact that I omit the Koran connection, as a results of fact it somewhat is my understanding that the Koran (the spelling that Yahoo solutions spell verify seems to approve of) replaced into written Circa seven hundred advert, (CE in case you elect, as a results of fact the Jehovah's Witnesses desire to apply) Apostle Paul's writings practice very much approximately what it skill to be a Christian. Giving thank you is fairly considerable. even in spite of the indisputable fact that i could by no skill advise to sit down down in judgement of that for which you're able to desire to invite forgiveness. in basic terms you and God be conscious of what you're able to or won't have achieved it somewhat is sinful. besides the undeniable fact that it does no longer injury everyone to be slightly greater grateful on a daily basis for each thing. Even the failings that take place that we don't understand. perhaps incredibly those issues. as a results of fact the failings that undertaking us the main are the failings that practice us the main. A scientist learns no longer something from the test that works. Gratitude is asserted to be the healthiest of all human thoughts.

Answer 4

Write a letter apologizing and stating that you want to get along because you are family after all. You might also want to suggest to your husband he call to talk to them, not necessarily about the fight, but just about whatever is going on. Let him know it's ok to talk to them, even if you're upset.

Answer 5

Then swallow your pride and apologize. Be nice to them when you're around them, but try to keep contact to a minimum. By you being the bigger person, there will be no other option then them looking like the petty fools they are. Good luck.

Answer 6

uh oh - the first step should be for your husband to make contact with them again... and then create an opportunity where you can all talk. Make sure this discussion happens on neutral territory or somewhere you feel comfortable.
Tell them...
I feel hurt when you xxxx xxx
I feel sad when you xxxxxxx xxxx

Answer 7

it will be hard to sit down and have a talk with them...i use to have in laws that hated me..they done everythin in their power to ruin my marriage and they finally got what they wanted..after i left my husband he turned on me too..i was so glad to be out of that crazy family...it took me a long time (17yrs) to put up with their dramas....i wish you all the luck in the world..

Answer 8

i would suggest writing everything you want to say down on paper then either talk to them about it or send it to them. not everything is your fault. your husband should be in this conversation too so he can help defend you (and if he doesnt id kick his as.s)

good luck.

Answer 9

Sit down like adults - be the bigger person. apologize and say you want things to be better. Communication is the key!

Answer 10

my ex husbands family hated me too. i just took them with a grain of salt and bit my tounge. there were a few aguements but eventually everyone gets over it.