I have a huge problem?

Question

I have five kids, The youngest is 8 mths. My period is late and i dont want to take a test until i am sure about what i am going to do. When i had my daughter i almost died having her and that has left me scared to go through this again. Also I dont want to tell my man yet as i dont know how to tell him or how he will react! I dont know why i am writing this as i know no one can really help but how can i deal with this while i am so scared?

Answer 1

People, please stop judging this woman! She asked for help not a rant.

Get a test done, tell your man and love your children.

Answer 2

Calm down!! Take the test at least you will know weather you have a reason to panic or not. If the test is positive tell your man and go see a doctor. I'm sorry you had such a bad experiance with your last pregnancy. If you are pregnant maybe this time will be better. If you really were so scared about having more kids why didn't you get your tubes tied? Or he could have had his tubes tied. Hind sight is 20/20 and all. I hope everything works out for you. Try not to be scared you have done this 5 times already. You are strong and can handle whatever the result. I truely wish you good luck.

Answer 3

wow people can be so judgemental always assuming the worst i have a close family frien who is the youngest of 13 kids no welfare no "scrounging from the government" just two parents who worked hard and supported their children why cant people have more then a few children without being on welfare but anyway enough ranting.

You mentioned yo almost died during childbirth with your daughter if this is an ongoing health risk you need to address it because your other children need you alive you should consider having your tubes tied after this if it is because yo dont want to find yourself in this position again. as for your man if he loves you he will be there if not he isnt worth your time worry about your children and the rest will work out

good luck no matter how this turns out

Answer 4

First of all just ignore all those pathetic answers to "cork it". You are asking quite a personal question on a public site and expecting a decent answer. I trust that none of those people get into your situation, which may or may not have been prevented. The best thing to do is to sit your man down and let him know how you are feeling. Don't hide anything as it takes two to Tango. Take the test, sooner, rather than later, with him! If it is positive then you both decide how to handle it. Don't panic until the test is done. Then make plans to avoid this happening again. Good luck.

Answer 5

First of all take the test. At least then you will know if you have anything to worry about. If it comes out positive then you should tell your man. I'm sure he would want to support you rather than you going through all this alone. If it was seriously dangerous for you the last time maybe you should consider having an abortion, because if the same thing happens again you have to think about your othe 5 children over the one inside, I'm sure that your family would rather have you alive and well than another child to look after. Good Luck I hope you will be ok.

Answer 6

I suspect (no, I'm pretty darn sure) that there is a lot more going on here with you and "your man". 5 kids are a lot for any woman to look after in this day and age....not that it can't be done, but it's tough work and long hours (as you well know!). I don't know if you are possibly having another because of religious reasons, or that you haven't been comfortable saying "enough is enough".
Please find a pregancy counsellor (often free at a pregnancy clinic), and talk this out with her - you need a calm, objective analytical opinion to sort thru this. THEN talk to "your man". You need some serious support to work thru this. I would also recommend (highly!!) getting a book called "Boundaries - when to say yes and how to say no", by Cloud and Thompson. It is an EXCELLENT book on how to feel comfortable in your own skin and space, and how to recognize when someone is stepping into you personal territory. I wish I had read it 30 years ago! It teaches you how to have legitimate self-control over the areas that are yours, and not feel guilty over things that are not your responsibility.
Please get someone to walk with you thru this (besides your man) - you need the support for YOU!! If you can find a local caring church, that would be a really good support system for you to have. PLEASE turn over every stone til you find the support you need.....don't walk to do this---RUN!!

Answer 7

I hope that with 5 children "the man" you are speaking of is your husband. If that's not the case, then if you are pregnant, adoption would be your best best.

But if you are married, then take the pregnancy test when appropriate and tell your husband about his child. You can't make a decision without him.

If you are married and want to have a large family just ignore all of those who accuse you of contributing to the population explosion. In our country, the birth rate has been falling for years and this trend continues.

Don't be scared. And don't make a decision about a tiny baby's life BEFORE you take the pregnancy test. He deserves to live whatever the outcome. If you can't assume responsibility, some other couple would LOVE to.

Answer 8

Just try to relax yourself and be calm. Try not to get worked up over something that may not even be. When you are able, you should schedule an appointment with your doctor. They are best able to help you in this situation, and is the best first step to take. If you are nervous about going, try to go with a friend, your mom, or another relative. You don't owe anybody any explanations, and if they press you can just tell them you need a basic check-up. Your health is the most important thing right now, for you, for your children and husband.

After you have seen the doctor you can think about telling your husband, etc.

I wish you all the best and wiil keep you in my prayers. Best wishes, and don't worry. Things will work out.

Answer 9

OK you have 5 kids already and you know what you have been thru before. Why are you not using birth control or better yet you should have had your tubes tied after the last one if you have no intentions of having anymore kids. You are a grown woman or at least I hope so but use the brian God gave you and think. Either use protection or get your tubes tied or just leave sex alone.

Answer 10

Er, have you ever heard of condoms? I'm sorry to say this but I have no sympathy whatsoever. If you're worried about getting pregnant after having an 8 month old already you should have thought of that before you slept with your "man" (your not married then?) Yes it does happen to people but 6 times is beyond a joke! P.S. I also hope you are supporting yourselves and not scrounging off us hardworking taxpayers. (I apologise if you are but a vast quantity of the population do get everything for free and it p***ses me off). I know it's not what you want to hear but I only believe in telling it how it is. Good luck anyway. Of course if you are I hope it goes okay but I just had to say my piece.

Answer 11

It seems to me that you don't have a choice!!!!!!!
Take the test for goodness sake, the longer you leave it the harder it's gonna be & if you're not too late you might be able to get the morning after pill from your G.P.
Also, make an appointment to discuss being sterilised as I think 5 kids is more than enough to cope with!!!! Better still get him to the doctors to book a vascectomy
Why risk dying maybe for a second time? Do you want to leave your kids without their mum?