Gay relationships seldom survive. Why?

Question

Two male egos, sex sex & just sex...

Great answers folks

Answer 1

My partner and I met when we were 18 and 21 and we met in the Disco Daze of the 80's we have now been together for 25 years.
I know plenty of couples who have been toghether as long or longer. There are millions of us, we are just not interesting to the media, so what you see is not all that is out there.

Gay relationships survive as well as straight ones. You think male and femail egos work together better? Take a look at divorce rates lately?

What is this moral high horse all heterosexuals have about marriage, when most mariages end in divorce over 50% I wouldn't call that successful?

WOULD YOU!

Answer 2

I believe there are plenty of gay relationships that last a very long time. It would be hard to get accurate statistics on something like that because most people who would study something like that have a reason. Experimenter bias well cause the person to find whatever results they are looking for either way. I personally think gay men have a similar success rate as heterosexual couples. Look at how may heterosexuals date several people before marrying, then sometimes divorce (over half the time) then date more and marry again. It's just that by pointing out the short-term relationships in homosexual relationships, some people can push their cause that homosexuality is wrong, but they are neglecting that heterosexuals do the same thing.

However IF that assumption was true that gay relationships don;t last as long I think it would be chalked up to one simple thing....men. Straight men, gay men, bisexual men, all men, have a reputation for fearing or shunning commitment. Not that all men do, but that's the label that men have. Is it accurate...nothing is accurate 100% of the time.

Answer 3

Gay relationships are not carbon copies of straight ones.

People (irrespective of orientation) are attracted to people who are like themselves - after all, this makes the relationship more stable in terms of commonalities. This is referred to as homophily. Homophily isn't the sole thing to drive a relationship or otherwise the whole human race would be homosexual.

Heterosexuality violates the concept of homophily as males/females are biologically and psychologically different.

It would appear that there has to be a certain level of antihomophily in a relationship. After all, differences make the relationship more exciting. Heterosexuals have antihomophily built in by their genders. Homosexuals, on the other hand, have to work round this - usually by going for a person a different age, appearance or race to themselves. When two people who are very similar get together, it can be great to begin with and then the relationship suddenly goes cold - this is more likely to happen with a homosexual than a heterosexual relationship.

Also, some homosexuals were not loved as children, and hence experience problems expressing love as adults. I should add at this point that none of this causes homosexuality.

Guys (irrespective of orientation) are also biologically promiscuous and have more opportunities for sex when women are removed from the equation (most women tend to prefer sex only within a relationship).

Answer 4

You seem to be forgetting lesbian relationships, many of which survive just fine. There is a couple in my neighborhood that have been together for over 65 years.

The same hate-filled people who go out and campaign against gay marriage then turn around and say "gay people are so promiscuous, they never have long-lasting relationships." Don't you find that extremely hypocritical?

Straight relatinships seldom survive either, if you go by the divorce rate. So what is your point here, other than to be bigoted and homophobic?

Answer 5

Several people have answered this question.

Human relationships, in general, aren't very successful.

There are numerous reasons.

The number one reason would probably be "not yet ready for a long term, committed relationship." Yet society insists that people should do that as soon as possible. If people would date a variety of types of people for a longer period of time they would be better educated as to who and what they want... not to mention who and what they are.

Unfortunately, people who do that are sometimes labeled "sluts."

When an employer is interviewing for a position in his/her company, they don't just do one or two and then make a choice, they interview as many as they can find who have the basic qualifications, then choose THE BEST one. Isn't choosing a life partner more important than that?

Answer 6

Gay relationships often survive...It's just that we disappear from the mainstream of gay life...I've been with my partner for 20 years...we have friends who have been together 39 years, 5 years etc....I think our record is at least on par with straights. we are all gay men....and if you're looking for a relationship that is based on sex sex sex..then of course your relationship will probably fail...try to determine what is really important to your life....anyone can have sex all the time...relationships take a lot of work but have far longer and greater rewards.

Answer 7

Relationships seldom survive. SOME few people, including heterosexuals, experience a relationship that starts early in life before several, even many failed attempts, and lasts a lifetime. For most people, they date and see a number of people before they find one that lasts that long. Afterall, half of all marriages in this country end in divorce.

While most people will experience one life-long relationship, or at least one or two very long term ones, most will also have numerous failed attempts while getting there.

Answer 8

It depends on the couple. If both partners are honest with each other and have great communication than the relationship will last, but in most relationship being a gay man myself. I think we jump into the relationship to quickly without taking time to establish areas of honesty, respect, and communication.

Answer 9

I suppose it depends on what your point of reference is - I know many gay couples who have been together for 10 or 20 years - I think that relationships are hard and when you are challenged by society as to whether your relationship is valid, it adds another challenge to the success of a relationship. I think that when people stop assuming that all gay people do or want is to have sex, that we might start seeing things differently. Gay couples are like other couples, they spend time together, live, shop, eat, travel and even fight!

Answer 10

I don't know where you get your facts, but they are definitely wrong.
Take a look at the divorce rate for straight couples....over 50%!
Not very successful in my book.
Why? Male ego against female ego and they cancel each other out? Is that your logic?
It's straight relationships that seldom survive.
I'm in my 17th. year with my partner.
My best friends are celebrating 24 years next month.
...and all of our parents are divorced.....