It's clear from the questions people post that alot of spousal abuse takes place. Why do we put up with it?

Answer 1

unfortunately they dont disclose any information so we cant really do anything for them. and i wouldnt advise posting information on here just because of how public it is. the only thing we can do is offer advice and someone to talk to.

if you meant "why do we put up with spousal abuse"... i cant stand it. i dont condone any violence, and against someone you claim to love is horrid.

Answer 2

Too often people don't know it's occuring. If the victim doesn't leave early in the abuse cycle they become entrapped by it. The verbal and mental abuse can knock their self esteem down to where they question themsleves as to whether they deserve it. Some stick it out because the feel they have no alternative for the kids. They can become ashamed and filled with guilt and fear, to where they're afraid to speak up. If physical abuse sets in, then they may fear for their life if they try to leave. Often times it's not until the fear seems real, that they'll finally find a way to get out. The toughest part is, it won't end until the victim finally makes the decision to leave. Up to that point, you may not be able to convince them because they'll deny it's happening.

Many abuse victims will tell you, it's the verbal and mental abuse that's the worse. The physical scars may heal within weeks, but the emotional ones may last a lifetime.

What we can do is make it well known in our society that abuse victims are just that....Victims. Not something they should be ashamed of or feel guilty about. The abusers have no conscience about what they are doing and become masters of control. Their victim was only guilty of loving and trusting them. Who wants to admit that someone you loved would do that to you? Learn the signs and just make it known if they ever need to leave, they will have a safe place to go.

I'm not an expert. I'm a friend of a woman who is very dear to me. I've seen what it's done and spent 4 years trying to break through and gain enough trust to where she at least knew she had someone she could always count on. Everytime it appeared it was getting close, she would back away and retreat into her protective world. Even with professional counseling. I knew there would never be a relationship. I just wanted her to know someone cared and saw her as someone who was worthwhile. But, I'm also a man and the ability to trust men has been diminished.

Answer 3

Because in the end we're all afraid of being alone.

A lot of people don't have family and their spuse is the only 'family' that they have. And many times they do not have friends to rely on either. Usually because of low self esteem issues and wanting to keep the shamefullness of the abuse a secret. It can be a very scary and cruel world out there for someone to take on all alone. Especially if they do not have the means to do so.

Answer 4

Your Majesty, As subjects of your lordship we beg your pardons, plzz dont dig our gardens, Spousal Abuse is Rampant, Why only the other day the queen beat you up in The royal gardens, and you didnt utter a word. U dared not touch your sword, She your spouse is still the queen, After all your majesty we are commeners and we have a lot of whatdoyousay? Commonsense. See we put up with our spouses after all and its the up and down of life that makes us mad at times and yet loving at other times,
Thanks your majesty.

Answer 5

We, or the abused???
My opinion is the abused tolerates for a variety of reasons.
Ignorance.....Fear.....Lack of self esteem....And for the life of me will NEVER understand, LOVE.