my dads misses was manipluating him, and tried with me. i " played the game" until i became exhausted 3 years down the line. Is there a quick fix??? lol
2006-07-10 20:34:04 · 8 answers · asked by tunachunks199 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I take it this your stepmother? Well, there's not much you
can do with a manipulator. That's in their nature. It's their
problem, not yours. You know what she is doing, so at least
you have that knowledge. Knowledge is power. You have
the real power. THE TRUTH. That has to be all you need.
Just be yourself, and don't let her get to you. Some people
get off on making others feel uncomfortable or intimidated
or under their thumb. But you already know she can't do
that to YOU.....Some people don't even realize their being
manipulated, that's how good those sort of screwy peeps
are. YOU recognize it. Consider yourself lucky . Like the
New Yorkers say," Forget about it!!".
2006-07-10 20:47:52 · answer #1 · answered by CraZyCaT 5 · 4⤊ 3⤋
I had a similar prob, in my mid/late teens. My Father was married for a 2nd time, and his 2nd wife (cow), was always trying too hard and to get me on side. Don't get me wrong, she was not trying to be or replace my mum ( who I was still living with most of the time), she was just trying to buy my affection and give me stuff my mum could not afford. In a waytrying to showing my mum up. The way I got round it was at the dining room table one evening, when I was visiting for a weekend, I just sat there and waited for another round of her crap from her, then explained to her in a very calm way the way things were and were going to be. I was honest, not rude , but blunt and to the point. I told her that I didn't like her, that she would never in a million years be as nicer or better person than my mum. I explained that when I came over for the occasional weekend, it was to see my Father, and not her. I told her that in future I would only be coming over if she were either visiting her older son from her 1st marrige, or going to be somewhere else other than here. The initial response was a delight. She hit the roof, said she was insulted, she had never been spoken to like that before( how or why I do not know) etc etc.
Ufortunately it put poor old Dad in a position of having to agree with me or side with her. I went home on the train straight away.
My Dad phoned me the following day and said maybe I shouldn't have spoken out like that, but wished he had done so a long time ago. My Dad and I had been astranged for a long time before that period of time , but in a perverse way we became closer. The cow and he stayed togeather, but she backed off whenever I was about.
I guess the moral of this true story is, honesty is the best policy, but if that is the parcel of truth, I guess you have to be carefull what sort of paper you wrap it in.
Take care. Best of luck, I do feel for you.
Simon. Norwich.
2006-07-11 03:56:46 · answer #2 · answered by simonc12345 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Look up the Triangle of Drama by Karpman, there are some resources on the internet. You can learn an AWFUL lot about your self and others and the way in which people can manipulate and be manipulated.
2006-07-11 15:01:03 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Completely ignore her. She's not even family. You probably already know the more you give in the worst it gets.
2006-07-11 04:30:01 · answer #4 · answered by CYNDIITA 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get out of the circle...go away and live ur own life.
2006-07-11 04:31:19 · answer #5 · answered by jen h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ignore her, get on with your life
2006-07-11 03:39:55 · answer #6 · answered by ANGEL-T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Beat the hell outta her.
2006-07-11 06:17:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
how was she manipulating you?
2006-07-11 03:41:08 · answer #8 · answered by Hippie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋