I have a close friend who in the past got an abortion, this was about 9 years ago. She might be pregnant again, she is thirty now, and is more than likely going to get an abortion with this one. i do NOT want her to do this...but i do not want to pressure her into doing something, just because its what i want. i am very upset and do not know what to do. she feels that there is nothing wrong with abortion. since it is legal, why not? (is how she feels) im so confused on how to help her. someone PLEASE help!
2006-07-10 15:10:07 · 25 answers · asked by lnglidewell 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
ok. yall have good advice. she HAS a child already. she basically summed up for me that if she had a baby to deal with, she couldnt do what she wants. she would be stuck with a screaming child.
i know it is her decision. i love her no matter what she decides, but i love her children to...born yet or not. i am the friend that stays home with her kids, she is the friend that would rather go "have a good time." although my children stress me out, they ARE a good time to me. she has trouble giving birth, she gave her first up for adoption..but she is afraid to have another c-section. both the babies she had, were through c-section. im just so upset.
2006-07-10 15:28:05 · update #1
It sounds like your friend uses abortion as a form of birth control. When a woman consents to having sex and becomes pregnant, she should be responsible enough to have that baby. And I don't care if she takes precautions not to get pregnant! We all know that when you sex, there is always a chance of pregnancy! I'm not saying for a woman to raise a baby she doesn't want, give it up for adoption. I don't really understand why your friend doesn't just go and get her tubes tied. Surly it would be less expensive then having abortion after abortion.
You know what else I don't get about abortion? We always hear
that it is the woman's choice. Her body, she has the right to decide. So if you get pregnant by a guy that WANTS the baby, too bad for him! After all, it's your body. Yet, why is it if a women decides to have a baby and the man she got pregnant by doesn't want the child, he's responsible for supporting it? Now I'm not saying that people shouldn't have to pay child support, what I'm saying is it's not not right that a man has no say in it if a women goes out and aborts his baby, but even if he doesn't want the child, well, he's still going to pay!
I think at the very least, if you are married, you shouldn't be able to have an abortion unless your husband agrees to it! ( I'm sure the women's rights people are going to have heyday with this! ) Unless of course the pregnancy could cause the mother to risk her life for some medical reason.
I don't know any woman that has had pregnancy's worse then mine. I am sick and in the hospital from the start of my pregnancy's to the very end of them. But I wouldn't abort a baby over that. That's not an excuse to have an abortion!
2006-07-11 10:01:08 · answer #1 · answered by Naples_6 5 · 21⤊ 8⤋
You know what's really sad? Look at this post...this girl has a friend who has already had one abortion and is more than likely going to have another. She apparently doesn't have a problem using abortion as birth control, and is throwing a perfectly wonderful life away. Then there's posts like the one directly BELOW this one where that lady is asking for advice on how to conceive. From the way I read it, this lady might have been trying for a while and is having no luck. Does anyone see anything wrong with what this world is coming to?
To answer your question...I really don't know. I am 100% pro-life. If your friend really doesn't want a baby, I seriously doubt anything you say or do will convince her to not have an abortion. The only suggestion I could give you is to research some websites that have pictures of aborted babies and show her what she'd be throwing away...and yes, aborted babies are thrown away as medical "waste". So sad.
2006-07-10 15:24:02 · answer #2 · answered by ewells1014 2 · 3⤊ 3⤋
i'm almost 34 now... i have a BOAT LOAD of fertility problems that i DIDN'T HAVE when i was 29! i guess if i were you i would find out if she ever wants children... the day may come when she wants kids and finds out her time has passed... it would be horrible to find out when you wanted a baby that the two you aborted were all that were in the cards for you. i do think you're right though... at 30 she is capable of taking care or an infant. regardless of how any of us feel, however, you need to respect her decision... it's her life! if she had the child someone, LIKE ME, would be more than willing to adopt it... that may be mine and my husbands only option...
2006-07-10 15:15:58 · answer #3 · answered by JayneDoe 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well, you are opening a big can of worms...If she is able and willing to go spread her legs to any Tom, D**k, or Harry around, she should take on the responsiblity of raising this child. That baby DID NOT ask to be here, it is a life no matter how old it is. If she does it again, she deserves no respect and I would personally let her know that.
Sorry for being so rude about it, but as a mother of four with a friend that has adopted a drug addicted baby, she is morally wrong and I would hope she lives with regret.
2006-07-10 15:16:51 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 6⤊ 3⤋
hmm, that's a tough one. Seeing as it's her that's getting one the most you can do is tell her how you feel or what you would do in her situation. Even though you don't approve, she probably could use your support....other than that don't know what to tell ya. My best friend got one a few years ago and even though she was real young at the time and I am pro-choice, it still disturbed me that she did it without even thinking about it.
2006-07-10 15:18:29 · answer #5 · answered by AngL 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bring up adoption with her. Just because she's had one abortion doesn't mean this child should be killed as well. Maybe her heart is softer now that she's older and she'll realize her unwanted baby would be a miracle for another family.
2006-07-10 15:20:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 1⤋
If there's no health reason why not (it caused distress and/or lots of pain the first time), then there's really nothing you can or should do, and you won't really be 'helping' her by stopping her. Obviously you don't agree with her on when a human life really starts, and that's not something you can force on someone. You'll just have to support her decision if she's really a close friend.
2006-07-10 15:17:03 · answer #7 · answered by DakkonA 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Hoe she is. HOpe she has a good husband or bf, too, and that she keeps the child. Keeping it and adoption are both better than abortion and birth control.
2006-07-10 15:15:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 1⤋
Continue to stick up for what you believe in, and as long as she knows where you stand, I think that's all you can do.
Some people dont think they are doing anything wrong, and well how are you gonna change her mind without getting into a heated debate.
I think you have a right as a "close friend" to tell her what your beliefs are too
2006-07-10 15:15:05 · answer #9 · answered by Kimberlynne 2 · 5⤊ 1⤋
tell her how u feel about her having the abortion and if u want the baby then tell her to give it to u
2006-07-10 15:18:17 · answer #10 · answered by angel h 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋