do all men put there own needs before there partners needs or am i just unlucky?

Question

my partner of 16 years is so self righteous and always seems to put his own needs before me all the time and i'm curious to find out if its a general thing because i plan to be single again in the not to distant future..

Answer 1

my man is the same way..we have been to gether almost 5 years..i keep prayin for a change in him it isnt happening..i really need to move on..maybe u should do the same..i know 16 years is a long time..but if u r unhappy y suffer

Answer 2

This is common with younger men, but not older men.

Older men have enough experience so that they put the needs of their partner before their own, almost always.

Don't settle for that next time. If he doesn't respect you and treat you like a Queen, or Goddess, and ask to be your "slave" then move on to the next candidate.

I mean, really, you only live life once, why not get a guy that gets all hot and excited when he can treat you like a Queen? There are plenty of them out there.

Let the guys who put themselves first all get together and play poker and watch football, while you are being treated to breakfast in bed.

Answer 3

16 years is a long time. Not all men put their needs first. My mom and my sister would both agree that not all men put their needs first.

My dad has always placed the needs of my mother first. He loves her unconditionally. My sister was a teacher and she wanted to quit to open up a daycare center, her spouse supported her even though she was out of work over a year putting her needs first. If you are not happy, don't settle for anything less.

Answer 4

Sure you can work it out...As for me. My wife is my life, I'm lost without her, she spent 3 days in the hosp awile back and I about went nuts..Were married 45 years and I can say I love this lady as much now as the very day I married her..met in 7th grade and were still going strong.. 20 years pluss Navy and now retired ...BEST THING THAT EVER HAPEND TO ME.. Now sweetheart, go seek help, dont ask here the answeers are crule and uncareing, or I should say alot of them...TALK TO GOD, TALK TO A PASTER, TALK TO A PRO BUT DONT GIVE UP WITHOUT A GOOD FIGHT Remember there must have been a good reason you got marrid in the first place... LOL and Good Luck.. God Bless.. ROB

Answer 5

Love based on GOD last for ever, u can read this book "Boy meets girl"

Which talks about the story of how the auther met and married his wife, Shannon. Where Harris's first book encouraged readers to throw off modern ideas of romantic fixation, Boy Meets Girl goes to the next level and urges single Christian men and women to pursue courtship, and ultimately marriage, thoughtfully and prayerfully. Knowing that many readers will balk at the idea of premeditated courtship, Harris insists that dating should not be emotional recreation but rather a careful decision rooted in obedience to God. While the anecdotes used to reveal true-to-life scenarios about dating pitfalls are somewhat elementary (and geared to those in their 20s), Harris succeeds in hammering home the point that obedience to God's word, selfless love, community, purity, and satisfaction in God are the most important aspect of any relationship. The last section of the book is particularly practical, discussing forgiveness of past sexual sin, questions to ask before tying the knot, and how an understanding of our sinful nature can lead to conflict resolution. For Harris's mere twentysomething years of life experience, his maturity and devotion to God are sincere evidence that he has indeed practiced what he has preached, resulting in a passionate relationship with the love of his life. --Jill Heatherly

Answer 6

if you are talking about sexaul needs you are right.he needs to be slapped. i consider that rape,if he finishes before you. if he does not make you have multiple orgasms everytime he has sex with you ( cause lets face it,if it's only good for him it's not lovemaking) then he doesn't care about your feelings.after being together that long you would think he would have figured out that the more satisfied a woman is in bed the more happier & hornier they are.if you get what you want you will want more and more. which is alway a good. i feel sorry for you,and wish i could help you out ,cause i don't mean to brag but i give my women what they want and need first ,mind shattering, body shaking orgasms that seem to rock the house (or so i was told)hope this helps.

Answer 7

You've been together for 16 years. Has he changed recently or his selfishness has always being there?

I don't think all men (or women) are the same way. Some of us do put our partners needs first, our children's needs first, etc. And some of us for a myriad of reasons do put our needs first.

Good luck

Answer 8

Well, you are probably just unlucky. Your needs can be met if your man goes down on you! And most men I think like this. It drives me freaking crazy and I could do that for hours and hours and hours.

Go ahead, be single again, and learn some new tricks!

Answer 9

Men are generally self-centered, so don't feel like you are unlucky. I highly recommend that you read a book called "Wild At Heart" by John Eldrige. It will help you understand your man and give you the depth to be able to help him become the person he is intended to be.

Answer 10

Sounds like your plan is a good one. Although a 16 year re lationship is hard to get away from, your needs should be met and respected. But don't leave if you're hoping it will jolt him into realizing that he has an ego problem. That won't work either.

Answer 11

I'm in that same club. Though I've only been with my dude for 2 years. He's gotten lazy in the relationship and takes me for granted. Time to move on for me I think, but it's not that easy for you with your long history I imagine. I just can't understand how men can get like that. Are we letting them, provoking them or what? Maybe they're just insensitive fools who will never make a woman happy?