How do i get my wife of 2 years to fall back in love with me. We both have said tings to each other that were hurtful but i forgive her . I have never been physical with her ever. Can anyone help me please she is the love of my life and the mother of my 2 kids. I want to grow old and gray with her.
2006-07-10 13:22:27 · 18 answers · asked by mlingen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dude, I am so sorry! I completely understand where you are coming from. It is just so hard to imagine how someone that you never imagined life without or even could dream of not loving could do that to you, right? I bet, before she said that, even through fights/arguments/disagreements/whatever you felt like she was your teamate in life. Then, all of a sudden by saying those words, it is like she got traded to your arch rival, the enemy. It's like one day you woke up and you knew how your life was going to play out, your world was spinning just like it would every day forever, and then she dropped that bomb on you and your world stopped spinning and started crashing down on you life you never, ever even imagined. Right? Yep, I know. Too many of us know.
Unfortunately, there is no good answer to your question. If you treat her like a queen, it may work, but it may drive her away even farther. If you change whatever you do that she doesn't like, it may work, but she might just see it as an act. If you express how much she has hurt you, she may feel sorry for you, think you are a crybaby or will think you are accusing her of causing this situation, which is true, but, trust me, she isn't going to want to accept fault. If you don't do anything, it may work, but if it doesn't you may beat yourself up for not trying hard enough.
Another horrible issue that you are going to have to face is are you ever really going to be able to forgive her for hurting you so bad? I mean, if she stays, are you really ever going to be able to get over this? Will you ever not be worrying about when she is going to pull this again? Are you going to walk on eggshells the rest of your life worrying that she might not love you if you make a mistake or standup for yourself? Those are really hard questions to answer.
Your situation is very curious. It seems nearly impossible to only be married for 2 years, already have 2 kids and yet there still be time for your wife to decide that she doesn't love you. Sure, we all make mistakes and all have personality traits we could improve, but whatever you do don't (this will be the hardest thing of all) beat yourself to mental death over her actions. Don't allow her to convince you that this is all your fault. It is in her best interest to displace the blame on to you, because no one wants to be at fault for breaking up a family especially when young kids are involved.
Dude, and I hate to do this, but it has really opened up the eyes of many dudes in your situation, check out womensinfidelity.com. Now, before you right it off saying that your wife isn't cheating or that kind of girl, which may very well be true, read the posts taken from the book, and then check out some of the posts. It's not all about cheating. It doesn't have to be.
Finally, try to clear your mind as best you can and try to analyze her motivation for doing this. What does she stand to gain? If she leaves you, where will she go? Will her parents take her and your 2 kids back in to their home? Can she survive financially without you? Is she a girl that takes care of herself? Has she ever lived alone, without parents, roomates or ex's? Did she just bet that hurting you would allow her to get her way on something? or get you to give up something she doesn't like? Why would she hurt the father of her kids so bad? Something to think about, huh?
Stay Up Playa!
2006-07-10 14:39:18 · answer #1 · answered by Cing 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
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2016-05-08 02:53:27 · answer #2 · answered by Estela 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Live life now like before, though I know is not easy, but you have to. Learn to forgive and shower more love and care. Communication with a cool head can solve most problems. Only focus and mention on positive issue. Conversation can start with kids progress and future.
2006-07-10 13:34:53 · answer #3 · answered by Trouble 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her what you just wrote and that whatever it was between u 2 u canot see the rest of your life without her, buy her flowers go home tell her to get dressed, dont take no for an answer and take her to a nice quite romantic place that you 2 share and tell her you are deply madly in love with her and that u canot exist without her and on the way there play a song by westlife its called i wanna grow old with you, and another one by westlife unbreakable. tell her u feel like you've lost your best friend and u are deeply sorry for everyting and want to work things out no matter what it takes :) i really do wish you good luck
2006-07-10 13:27:48 · answer #4 · answered by jm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The definition of love in 1 Cor is not a definition of love in marriage...is it the definition by which all Christians should demonstrate love to everyone...it is the definition of Agape (or perfect) love...the love that Christ demonstrated to us when he died on the cross...but it is not the definition of marital love. Check out Proverbs 31 it might shed light on how to be a respectful wife... and to answer your other question I think wives have such a hard time respecting their husbands because they are human beings with flaws and insecurities and it is hard to demonstrate Godly, spiritual characteristics when you live in the flesh. edit:doingmybest great reference and great book!!
2016-03-27 00:18:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say your sorry for whatever you did. when you do it Look in her eyes. tough her - words aren't enough - women need touch and intimacy as well. write down all the pros about her and communicate them to her and do little things that she normally has to take care of. a romantic dinner lasts one night but small things done repeatedly last forever.
2006-07-10 13:54:40 · answer #6 · answered by greenurbanite 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell her how much you love her and that you won't say anymore hurtful things to her no matter what and if ya'll ever have a problem work it out between the two of ya
2006-07-10 13:25:50 · answer #7 · answered by colombia129 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever used Pull Your Ex Back method? Move on this site : http://ExRecoveryFormula.com/ . This could undoubtedly assist person!
2014-08-19 06:25:10 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take her out for a nice romantic dinner, adn an evening alone ;)
2006-07-10 13:41:38 · answer #9 · answered by Melissa N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can't MAKE her fall back in love. if things don't become right in about a year, maybe it's time for a divorce
2006-07-10 13:25:50 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋