I'm 26 and was recently in a relationship fr 10 years and we have 2 kids. I found out he was cheating with my best friend. Now I dont know what to do he had changed somewhat but can this really happen? Or has this ever happened to anyone?
2006-07-10 12:58:04 · 20 answers · asked by HI:) 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
yes, people can change! Me and my husband both are "reformed" cheaters lol. Good luck.
2006-07-10 13:00:51 · answer #1 · answered by heidielizabeth69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The saying, once a cheater always a cheater, is hard to believe. I think that if the person is really dedicated they can change but it would take some work in trying to believe they changed. When I was in high school I had boyfriends and I cheated on them, my mom always told me that there was no way I would ever be a good wife because I cheated then. Now I am happily married going on 6yrs and I have never cheated. Who knows!
2006-07-10 20:02:05 · answer #2 · answered by evie_cooper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Other than your age and the rolls reversed your story sounds allot like mine.. My wife and i was together for 10 years and had two kids.. We were both cheaters when we meet and i felt that we had both changed, but i found out that i was the only one that had changed. I was faithful to her from day one. But about a year and a half ago she started cheating on me with her ex and i tried to work through it but the about 6 months ago i caught her cheating on me with a friend of mine. So now she is gone! and I'm starting my life over.. So i will say that there is a 50/50 chance and cheaters changing!!! Because in my case i did and she didn't... So i wish you all the luck in the world....
2006-07-10 22:13:14 · answer #3 · answered by nclonewolf1962 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cheaters can change, but it depends on what kind of person. Is it someone who you would shock the hell out of you if you found out they cheated? If so, it was probably nothing that was planned and it just happened. I would be very weiry tho, as the saying goes once a cheater always a cheater. But if you don't trust them, then you need to end the relationship. You would spend your life wondering are they really working late? Did he meet someone at a bar? Is he really out fishing? It's no way to spend a life. So if the trust is gone, you need to be to.
2006-07-10 20:07:25 · answer #4 · answered by shelbsyd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I honestly don't think that cheaters change. They have to really want to and even then the trust is not going to be there for you. My sisters husband had a whole nother family on the side and they went to couples conseling and they finally ended in a divorce. He kept cheating. Sad.....There are no morals or values among people today.
2006-07-10 20:31:15 · answer #5 · answered by kaseymay_2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A cheater can change, but odds are normally against it. You have to figure out for yourself whether you can live with the trust issue. It may be a long time, if ever, before you can find yourself trusting them. If you decide to live with it, you have to put it in the past, you can't throw it in his face every time you have an argument. That isn't right, what he did wasn't right either, but you have to either hang on to the anger and get out of the marriage, or hold onto the marriage and get out of the anger.
2006-07-10 20:03:52 · answer #6 · answered by jimmy h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, he can change, but not without figuring out why he cheated in the first place. Obviously there's something wrong with either his mindset or your relationship - you can try going it alone but the odds aren't with you. You'd be best off with him getting counseling to try to figure out what went off in his head, and then get counseling together to work out your problems as a couple. If you both really want this to work you'll be willing to put in the time and effort. Good luck.
2006-07-10 20:08:38 · answer #7 · answered by Elizabeth 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No people cheat not because they are not happy with themselves. They feel the need to be wanted and they don't think of anyone but themselves and how they feel when they are wanted by one or more people. Can cheaters change NO, because their self esteem usually falls more than it raises.
2006-07-10 20:29:35 · answer #8 · answered by carmelita71 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen.. i can't tell u no they don't change or yes they do.. every single person out here is different.. you know?.. if i were u, i'd give him a second chance.. u know?.. since u guys are married and have a family now.. but all i;m saying.. if he cheats on u one more time!.. that's it.. make sure he has it straight and clear that he only has one opportunity. o crap but it was wit ur BEST friend?.. thats pretty bad.. good luck gurl... imma prey 4 u
2006-07-10 20:10:11 · answer #9 · answered by *???吒⡡!* M 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well...almost the same thing happened to me....I was married to my ex husband for 3 years and he started having an affair with my best friend...she was married also! They both denied it for a few months....and finally I had enough I said it was OVER!!...her husband left her a few months later and my then best friend and ex husband moved in to gather!! they are now married!! But like I always say "ONCE A CHEAT ALWAYS A CHEAT!!!" she will cheat again if she isn't all ready...(there is another guy living with them)
Good Luck with you, and you will find your soul mate...I did!! ^_^
2006-07-10 20:19:24 · answer #10 · answered by brat71825 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best friend in all relationships need to go by the wayside.My now husband brags tht he did his xwfes best friend when she divorced him! Such sickos! But best friends want to have what u have or at least try it! No he will always be a dog ! So will best friends!if givin the chance!
2006-07-10 20:04:02 · answer #11 · answered by jessy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋