ok so i have this friend who invites me to sleep over her house i go 2 her house and her mom says i cant sleep over because they already have visitors so i say yeah but u said i could and her mom was like no! nobody told me anything and i was like ok so can i hang out a little and she said yes only for a while so then well were all talking and goofing off and then one of them calls these 2 girls that are also my friends and they plan to go to the movies altogether and they were waiting till i leave home so they can go to the movies...so there mom took me home and they all left to the movies so is that wrong that she didnt invite me? because my mom thought it was wrong of them and they knew i had money to go and i was right there when they were planning it.
2006-07-10 12:56:15 · 26 answers · asked by Tanairis Aponte 1 in Dining Out ➔ Other - Dining Out
HONEY I'M REAL OLD AND I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND IDIOTS
AB
2006-07-14 12:39:18 · answer #1 · answered by alice b 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
1. The girl should have cleared the stay-over with her mom. This wasn’t your fault.
2. After the Mom said "No". You can't argue with it, it is the Parent's choice. Even if the daughter invited you. Maybe the Mom could have been more understanding, but she may have had some reason that you don't know about.
3. It does sound like you asked if you could "Hang out" for a while longer, which sounds like you expressed your interest in being included. Which is good, you asked for what you wanted.
4. The mother said "Only for a little while (longer)." Which means she really felt; "You should go home now". But was trying not to be too mean.
5. "One of the them calls..." I have to assume either the friend who invited you over, or the other "Visitor(s)". How many people are at the house already? The Mom may simple not have prepared (food, blankets, towels) to have extra guests in the home, and felt "put on the spot".
6. They waited till you were gone to go to the movies. It was not kind for them to discuss the plans in front of you. They had poor taste. It showed a lack of maturity.
7. Ideally they would have either not gone to the movies, or not planned it until you were gone. Since the Mom was already feeling "put upon" inviting yourself to the movie would not have been the best idea. You acted correctly even when no one else was. The Worst thing they could have done was leave to go to the movies while you were still there, at least they didn't do that.
8. I would give this household some distance. The daughter doesn't seem to be communicating well with the Mother. If you don't take extra care it can harm your reputation. In your teen years the Parents of Friends become sources of job leads and other such contacts in the community. It is important to stay in their good standing.
9. The girls clearly showed lack of maturity. They may have done it on purpose or without thinking. You won't know unless you talk to them. In a non-accusing way, try to point out how you felt in the situation.
Use sentences with "I". Such as; "I feel...", "I think", or "I believe. Avoid sentences like "You did this...", "Why didn't you..., or other "You" sentences.
Good luck.
2006-07-10 20:31:16 · answer #2 · answered by Crystal Violet 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tam,
I think that was about the meanest thing I have ever heard a mother do. I am a mother and I would never allow my daughter to treat someone like that, much less a friend.
The daughter is learning this kind of behavior from her mother and will treat people like her mother does. That's no friend honey.
To make plans and not include you is wrong when all these other people are also friends.
Honey, I hope you find a new friend because this girls is not.
2006-07-10 22:03:42 · answer #3 · answered by Cyndee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's very unpolite for someone to talk about going to the movies and not invite you, unless they had made plans before hand and were just confirming it.
I personally would have asked if you could come also. I would talk to the friends and find out what the scoop is. You might find out a good reason or you might find out that they are not really your friends after all.
Good luck!
2006-07-10 20:03:59 · answer #4 · answered by walking2health 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say it was not wrong but definitely rude considering you were invited by oyur friend originally. I have a feeling that the firend may have not cleared this with her Mom and angered her Mother. Her Mother then took out that anger on you. It was not fair but in reading between the lines I would say this is what happened.
2006-07-10 20:02:48 · answer #5 · answered by rhutson 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you ask if you could come too? Did you involve yourself in the planning? Did you express any interest that you wanted to go? Or did you just wait for someone to invite you or did you expect them to "just know" that you were coming too?
If you want something, just say so! They probably didn't even know you were interested in going with them.
2006-07-10 20:03:03 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is totally wrong. They should have invited you. I think you need to reconsider your friends and find some who appreciate you and want to spend time with you. Don't let it get you down. There are plenty of other cool people out there who will like you and accept you. Keep your chin up and just keep being yourself. :o)
2006-07-10 20:04:00 · answer #7 · answered by muffin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, a Mom has perogative over who stays and who goes and as a minor, all you can do is smile about what's given to you and be polite. That is to say, it's sad that she tried to exclude you from that group, but there's nothing you can do about it. Getting bitter will only distance you further from your friends. Sorry that happened and best of luck.
2006-07-10 20:01:55 · answer #8 · answered by Alex 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's not the nicest thing in the world that they didn't invite you but things happen. I wouldn't harp on it. Change is a constant in life - better to get used to it at a young age then be shocked by it when you are older.
2006-07-13 16:42:12 · answer #9 · answered by dolphinchick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know, but it sounds to me that they are trying to ditch you and form there own little group of friends.pretty soon they will be to snobby to hang out with you.and the mom sounds like she doesn't want her kid hanging around the unpopular kids. I SAY DITCH THEM ALL AND FIND NEW FRIENDS. cuzz it was RUDE of them to make other plans and not include you!!!
2006-07-18 16:39:30 · answer #10 · answered by GOLDENFAIRY 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My dear girl: Please don`t take it so hard you may have to consider finding your self better friends a mother is usually a good example of how a son or dauther may be like, just like when you look for a boyfriend it`s a good idea to meet his parents, the mother in special. GOOD LUCK BYE.
2006-07-10 20:09:18 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋