were can i get a live monkey?

Answer 1

Monkeys for Sale!

"Ooooh! They are so cute! I want a monkey!"

If you are like many, you think a monkey/chimp would be the perfect pet. They're just like little babies and they can do much more than a dog or cat. Look on tons of bulletin boards and you see people with ads wanting an inexpensive (or free) monkey.

Well, let us see if we can talk some sense into you. See, monkeys and chimps are not good pets. Let's start with chimps.

Chimps are really cute. No denying that. They are smart and share 98.5% of the human genes. Baby chimps are also expensive. Plan on up to $50,000 for a baby. (Older ones are at least $10,000 and sometimes much more.) They are very much like human children and require full time care. You will carry the baby chimp around with you pretty much all the time. If you are lucky, you will have full time help so you can get a little breathing room. You can't hire a typical baby sitter like you would for children. No more weekends at a bed and breakfast and vacations are hard to work in unless you have a chimp nanny!

Chimps also throw temper tantrums - just like regular children. The only problem is that chimps can be seven times stronger than a grown man. They bite and can cause serious injury. Did I mention that the males enter adolescence around or before they are five years old? They can live 25-35 years. You will need a huge cage (think room or small house size) or a climate-controlled habitat. It's not uncommon for the cages/environments to cost up to tens of thousands of dollars.

Lets not forget medical care. A lot of people take their chimps to human doctors but your insurance won't pay for them. That means a single doctor visit can easily run you $500 and the chimp goes a couple of times a year. Food and medicine will be at least a couple hundred dollars per month. And, of course, those Baby Gap clothes are really cute, but oh, so expensive!

Not rich enough for a chimp? How about a monkey?

The short answer is 'no'. Let's address those 'cheap' or 'free' monkeys first. If someone is selling a monkey cheap you can bet that this is an older monkey and certain to have behavioral problems. These monkeys are often passed around from owner to owner and can be very aggressive. One monkey we know has killed various animals - including other monkeys. If you want a pet, don't even think about buying an older monkey.

Monkeys can live 15 - 30 years; depending upon the breed. They mature at different rates depending on the breed, but you can play with them as cute, controllable little babies only up they are 7-9 months old. After that they may be sweet and gentle for a few years. Capuchins may enter puberty around 5-6 years old. De Brazza's may mature a bit later and others enter puberty a little earlier. After puberty most primates will become more aggressive. This is especially true for male primates.

Monkeys are easier to care for than Chimps, but it is still hard. They require special cages and require constant intellectual stimulation to remain healthy. In almost all cases, you can't let the monkey roam free in the house. They will tear the house apart or hurt themselves. Picture a monkey putting their hand on a hot stove or biting an electrical cord.

Most monkeys do not throw feces, but you will need a diaper on them if you plan on keeping them in your home. You will need to change the diaper throughout the day and watch for diaper rash. It isn't hard to nappy train them if you start when they are babies, but some monkeys just don't want to wear them. Monkeys are really fast (and work in three dimensions), so good luck chasing them down if they don't want to wear their diaper.

If you already own a monk and truly care about your monkey, you will be sure that he/she gets top flight care from a veterinarian. It isn't fair to the animal if they aren't getting the same care that a person gets. It can be expensive - thousands of dollars in some cases. A well-nourished, proper diet is paramount to their good health as well. Just as junk food isn't good for a human, it isn't good for a monk either!

Monkeys may not do well with strangers, so finding a trained, reliable baby-sitter. Plus, not every "sitter" wants to change a monk nappy! Unless you have a trained person that is known by the monk, the best you can usually do while is to leave them in their cage while someone else gives them food and water. Most people with monkeys give up going out or going on vacation. It isn't impossible - it's just hard.

Monkeys are social animals. They either need another monkey or they need you as their constant friend. Monkeys that don't have this become isolated and often become mildly neurotic. Think about the kid who gets left out of everything at school and becomes a psychopath and you are beginning to understand what happens to a monkey who doesn't get enough attention.

Contrary to urban legend, monkeys are not responsible for disease. Unfortunately, they are very susceptible to human disease. Monkeys raised in captivity do not have the same immune systems. We have had monkeys die from diseases they picked up from children or others. Colds, viruses and the flu bug are all very dangerous to your monk.

Some primates require special licenses and FDA inspections. You can be fined in some cases if you have not followed the proper channels in purchasing your monk. Worse, some localities can seize your baby. Remember the Diana monk in NY that a couple had raised as part of their family and it was seized in not the too distant past? What a heartbreak! That means that you might not be able to move to a certain area because you own a primate.

Bottom line: chimps and monkeys are not good pets. We love all of our babies that we raise. We only wish the best of homes for them. We know more about primates than most people since we have had the opportunity to raise the babies for a number of years. But we would never consider owning a chimp as a pet even for a day and we don't keep baby monkeys longer than six or seven months (and that's a stretch for them being inside our home!) More often than not, a person with a monkey ends up being miserable, the monkey is miserable, and worse, the monkey doesn't get the care it deserves.

What are some alternatives? Sugar gliders are popular. So are chinchillas. Prairie dogs can be fun, but sometimes bite. Bush babies are very popular these days. Ferrets and skunks can actually be great pets and are still uncommon.

If you are insisting on a monkey, at least get a squirrel monkey. These are small primates about 12" tall. (A lot of people think these are spider monkeys. Spider monkeys are up to four feet tall and very strong. They can smack you around a lot with their long arms.)

So please, love the animals. Visit them at the zoo. Volunteer for a rehab facility. Give money to support abused animals. But don't get a monkey for a pet.

Answer 2

You don't. Not legally.
Monkeys are wild animals, living beings not meant to be held captive as pets. They cannot be easily trained, and cannot be expected to respond to in an expected manners.
Sure, they're cute, and SO adorable in movies and on TV - Do you want to know HOW they get them to behave so cute in the media. ABUSE!
They take the babies from their mothers (maybe even killing the mother in front of the traumatized baby) long before they would leave the mothers in the wild. They then "train" the monkeys NOT by using rewards - but by NEGATIVE reinforcement...Hitting, kicking. throwing them against the wall, or on the floor, starving them, burning them. All to get a cute animal to be cute on cue so someone can make BIG money. These animals die young, frightened and alone. Nice, huh?
The cute monkey you think you want belongs with its mother in th wild - NOT here in the United States - "playing" in circuses, in films or in the hands of someone not properly trained to take care of a very unpredicitable animal.

Answer 3

At the zoo no I'm just joking I don't know but I always wanted a live monkey

Answer 4

Silly, monkeys have been extinct for years! However, if you're really interested, I can get you one preserved in formaldeyde, and for a very reasonable price.

Answer 5

Most states, unless you have the proper educational or research permits, don't allow you to legally keep monkeys.

Answer 6

DON'T GET ONE.

Monkeys and apes are our closest living relatives in the animal world and their facial features bear a striking resemblance to human primates. As such, many individuals purchase baby monkeys/apes believing that these primates will be a suitable "substitute" or a "surrogate" for human children. Others are inundated with images of nonhuman primates in advertisements, on television and in the movies which depict infant and adolescent primates as "cute and cuddly". Often the naive viewers are given the impression that nonhuman primates would make ideal 'pets'.

These individuals are - at best -misguided. There are tragic consequences (for all concerned primates, human and nonhuman) that can result when a formerly dependent baby monkey/ape reaches sexual maturity.


If you are contemplating getting a monkey and intending to keep the monkey as a pet, please read the information on this web site http://www.petmonkey.info/ and visit the links to see for yourself why this is a very bad idea for all primates (human and nonhuman) involved.

Regardless of how well-intended, there are very few people who have the knowledge and/or resources to provide captive monkeys/apes with adequate care for a lifetime. Baby monkeys/apes entered in to the 'pet' trade are robbed of the opportunity to be raised by their biological mothers, and as they mature their natural inclinations are stifled by attempts to mold them in to 'obedient pets'. When formerly dependent baby monkeys/apes reach adolescence, they begin to exhibit aggression. In accordance with their natural behaviors, monkeys/apes bite and scratch. Often, the end result is displacement (following negligent/abusive treatment, both physically and mentally) of the monkey/ape. Some monkeys/apes are condemned to living the rest of their lives alone in a cage with little or no personal contact with other living beings. Others are "sent away" because of their "bad" behaviors. Some monkeys/apes may even be euthanized by the owner.

Children are especially vulnerable to being attacked since monkeys and apes are naturally inclined to establish dominance hierarchies.

Many individuals who purchase exotic animals, including monkeys and apes, intending to make them in to 'pets' do not consider the following:

Exotic animals need physical and psychological enrichment; spacious and secure enclosures; companionship of conspecifics, and they have specialized dietary and nutritional needs. Depending on the species, costs associated with responsibly caring for an exotic animal can run in to thousands of dollars a year. Many insurance companies refuse home owner's coverage to those in possession of species deemed 'dangerous'. In many locales, it may be difficult or even impossible to find a veterinarian who is qualified and experienced to handle/treat exotic species. New bills/laws banning private sector possession of wild/exotic animals are being introduced/passed at unprecedented rates (many of these bills/laws do not have "grand fathering" clauses.) Unlike domestic dogs/cats, some animal species (for example, nonhuman primates) can have life-spans of 30-40 years.

Answer 7

Afreaka

Answer 8

i knew someone that had a monkey and it use to sh!t all over the house.

Answer 9

S.E. Washington DC on the street corner!

Answer 10

michael jackson, but they may need some counseling. << pricey choice

the wilds of africa, but plane tickets are probably needed. << also pricey

overall, the cheap way: rob the zoo.

jkjk