Good Luck to you. And, thank you for serving our country. I hope everything works out for you.
Write her and tell her that you love her and want to work on your marriage as soon as you can. You might even send the letter to a third party to deliver in person.
For example, your brother, pastor, sister, mom, or dear friend could deliver the letter to her and give her a spoken message as well. (Write down what you want the bearer to say.) Ask them to bring flowers on your behalf when they deliver the letter.
2006-07-10 10:22:49
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answer #1
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answered by Otis F 7
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I wish more then anything that I could answer the question for you and tell you what to do in order to make this situation better, but as a military wife, I'm all to familiar with this.
You're both under so much pressure right now. You're in the middle of a war and trying to do the best job you can do under the circumstances you have to deal with day and night. You also have the added stress and worry over your home life and trying to keep your marriage together. Your wife is having to deal with worrying about your safety, and all the everyday task that the two of you normally deal with together when you're home has now become her responsibility to take care of all are her own. It's hard and it's scary. Her world is at a stand still until you walk off that plane and back into her arms. We know that we could never imagine what you're dealing with over there, but remember that it's not a easy for the spouses either. You have an idea of what your facing in Iraq, she only has the images she is seeing off the news and what you're telling her. If you have a while where you
you can't call or email her, you know that you're okay, but she is forced to wonder if you're alright and until she hears that you are, she is scared to death.
You have to tell her that your marriage is important enough to save. She has to see that this is just a temporary thing that will pass. This is not how she is going to have to live her life forever. Tell her you'll do what you can while you're away to make her understand how much you love her, and tell her when you get home you'll continue to do whatever it takes.
I had never in my life felt as helpless as I did when my husband deployed. It's a feeling that only those who have been through it can understand. He had just as hard of a time. To this day, he still feels guilty that he had to leave when I was six months pregnant with our first child, and he's still not over missing the birth.
Don't beat yourself up by trying to figure out what to do from over there, because you don't have a lot of choices. You can only do so much.
I wish you and your wife the best. Hang in there. You stay safe and hurry home! We are proud of all of you over there.
2006-07-10 12:48:25
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answer #2
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answered by Naples_6 5
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You are in Iraq and you need to focus on what you are doing today in the here and now in Iraq. Your imagination is probably running wild because you are under stress. Just tell your wife how much you lover her and miss her and in the meantime, keep your wits about you.
Know that you can find a lot of comfort in prayer. God really hears your voice. Talk to a trusted friend and to your chaplain. Keep doing what you have to do because we are so proud of you.
I will pray for you and ask the Lord to give you comfort and make your marriage concerns go away until you get home, and for your safety and the safety of your friends and family. Blessings to you in Jesus Name.
2006-07-10 11:05:30
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answer #3
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answered by happydawg 6
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Thank you for serving our country i do not know exactly the specifics on what is going on in your marriage i know its probaly hard to be there and also deal with the issues that you have going on at home let her know that you want your marriage to work and that you are willing to work at it and tell her that you need her support right now and that soon you guys can be together and will be able to work through what ever is going on i am sorry that you have to go through this and also deal with being in Iraq stay safe out there and i wish you the best for your marriage.
2006-07-10 11:43:28
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answer #4
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answered by Marissa M 2
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You know, my husband and i went through the same thing. He's in country, has been for 8 months.
Talk to her..tell her how much this past year has meant to you, with her staying by your side, tell her how much you love her for doing this for you...I know there isn't much that can be done when you're so far away, but since talking is the only option you have, SUCK UP!!!!! lol
I know it's hard over there...but it's hard on this side too. We're the ones left behind. There's alot of insecurity, lonlieness, sleepless nights, and LOTS of anger. If she has any respect for you, she's going to wait until you get home to make a decision on leaving you. If she doesn't, it might not be worth it. I'm sorry to have to put it that way, but its' true.
Good luck with everything....if you have any questions or need advice, my email is cowgirl15747@yahoo.com. I'm here to help.
thank you for protecting us!
2006-07-10 10:35:36
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answer #5
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answered by ashy_cowgirl83 2
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What are some of the issues? I was in Iraq and it was very, very hard being away for 15 months isn't easy. My only advice would be just talk to her, listen to her just listen don't disagree don't agree just listen and give her that shoulder she need even though your 7000 miles away, if all you got is 2 months left you have it dicked you'll be home in no time. I hope this helps.
2006-07-10 10:21:07
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answer #6
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answered by The Pooh-Stick Kid 3
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Thanks for serving our country.
I think I'd do anything it takes to have her hang on.....like listen to what she says, don't fight, don't disagree. You'll have time for that when you get face to face. Right now, I'd be sucking it up big time and holding on tight.
Pray for her strength and your marriage....let her know that she's important enough to you to ask for help.
Maybe she's afraid of the changes that come with the return of a loved one. It's unknown in our generation. We don't have movies that show us how to do it, we don't have tons of friends who have been through it.
She knows that she's changed while you've been on duty, she might wonder how much you have and be worried about that also.
I also liked someone else's idea to have someone you know bring her flowers or a letter....then maybe she can bend that person's ear.
Good luck. I can't imagine the feelings of helplessness you would have being in this situation and so far from home. Hold on, and keep strong. Day by day the time will get shorter and you'll be able to touch her and remind her of your devotion.
2006-07-10 10:59:39
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answer #7
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answered by dietcokeani 3
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im sorry to hear that it really hurts me that some one serving is going through marriage problems. i served in the navy and my husband was in the marines we both did 4 yrs and were always on deployment we hardly saw each other and his imagination runned wild with him, he too went to iraq and many other countrys he hardly saw me, but you know we kept in touch via email and writting, i used to hae pictures of him every were, and i can tell you that may be your wife has a hard time as well and misses you and doesnt know how to deal with it, that is stress ask your famil y for help to get her involved in church or support groups, it will make the both of you bond, she will feel closer to you and you can have peace of mind an concentrate on what your doing so you can get back home safe, dont argue over the phone, thats the wors thing we did, dont do the same, i got in an accident thinking of crap like that. this is something that can make your marriage stronger or find out if it wasnt meant to be, ask your family for support and to be there for her while your gone, it helped us out.
2006-07-10 11:28:54
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answer #8
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answered by jackiegradilla 1
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You had to step up to the plate and go to Iraq.
Is her situation worse than being shot at!
What you can do now is expect her to grow up, you wife needs to be a woman now not a child. If shes not up to being a grown up, dump her because you don't have a marriage you have an overgrown selfish child for a mate
You can do better than that.
Be safe man. Concentrate on getting home alive.
2006-07-10 10:22:36
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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Each person has an emotional bank account. We make deposits and with-drawls. Deposits are genuine acts of love and kindness. With-drawls are acts of unkindness and hurt. What one person may see as a deposit, may not necessarily be a deposit for another person. If your not around to make a lot of deposits do something out of the ordinary that can count as a deposit.
Surprise her with something. Even if it a simple handmade card. I should say especially if it is hand made. I have only been married for three years, but that's all it took to learn that my wife and most women love simple and sincere expressions of love. Something that she won't be expecting. Make her cry for the joy of being loved.
2006-07-10 10:39:50
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answer #10
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answered by Luke 1
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Write her a long, sweet letter full of the stuff us girls love to hear. Not enough details to really give an answer. Could you give some more info on what the problems are and maybe we can help you a little more? Anyway, a nice, romantic letter all about how wonderful she is, how much you love her, etc. couldn't hurt! Good luck! (hand-written, not email)
2006-07-10 10:30:54
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answer #11
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answered by Lotus 6
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