my wife seems to be putting her career before our marriage, what can i do?

Question

i feel that our marriage is beginning to crumble

Answer 1

You know, each and every one of us is here as an individual. Should people not strive to be all they can be simply because they love another. Your wife might be focusing a bit more on her career now and that might make things a bit harder at home for a while - but it is not likely to be permanent and you could be a bit more supportive of her. In this short life time we get precious few chances to really be great - don't we all deserve to make the most of those opportunities without having to worry we will lose our mate?

Peace!

Answer 2

Im not married but I am in a relationship and have been for some years now. We live together and I have seen this before with us. I dont know why...And then on the weekend your both tired to do anything and the other person is focusing on the income that just HAS to come in from hard work and dedication? So then you feel like all that is occuring is work and no play? Also, I come from parents who split up before I could speak up so I definitely seen this issue. The truth is, you guys are married and at some point have to speak up. I dont know how well communication is in the relationship but it should be good enough if you love each other and are married. I'm sure shes at work thinking of you and what you are doing, and how you are reacting to this situation. She cant be that busy. Money is proly like the top issue in couples relationship. It seems a little selfish to be putting her career in front of the relationship. But maybe she feels like she's been doing alot of sacrificing and wants to do something for herself becuz it makes her happy. Although I cant possible imagine what could make someone more happy than to have a loving husband like you who worries. Plus it pays the bills. Has the topic come up? Have you argued over it? Does she do everything in the house? Do you help out? You really should talk to her and tell her that you think the marriage is in trouble. Don't run off with another gal. Thats ridiculous. Problems are meant to be faced...not run from. Thats why we have them. A marriage is a team. It will never be fifty fifty. Somedays itll be 80/20 and other 60/40...sometimes 50/50. On bad days its 100/0. You know, marriages crumble when people dont meet eye to eye. My parents were like that and if affected me alot. Hey, cheer up. make a dinner for her rub her feet, tell her shes been working too hard and you appreciate it, and then bring the topic up letting her know you feel a little hurt that there isnt enough time for the two of you. Try not to argue and just listen to each others points of view. Good Luck...

Answer 3

You can thank the feminism movement for destroying families. Women get thier self-esteem from thier husbands while men get thiers from thier jobs (In traditional gender-roles). Your wife has a substitute husband with her career. Her self-esteem and sense of worth now come from her job. If you don't have children then you might consider talking about that with her. A pregnant woman has more maternal, domestic instincts and it may temper her desire to forsake you for her job. If that doesn't work then ride the storm my good man. Because even the best career will end. And it will only be at the end of her career when she finally realizes what she has done and where her true identity lies. A good career is worth a lot but a good marriage is priceless.

Answer 4

Don't cheat on her. That will just create a bigger problem. Your marriage is not about to crumble because she's working a lot. It's about to crumble because of your low self-esteem. Take up a hobby and give it a little more priority. Start playing music, soccer or hockey or something. Or just go drinking with your friends. Soon enough she'll get jealous and start putting you first, and you'll realize it's ok for you two to each have your own time. If you're having this much trouble on her job, you'll really hate it when you have kids.

Answer 5

You both need to sit down and talk about your relationship. Communication is always a key factor in a marriage. Maybe she doesn't feel as if she's putting her career ahead of your marriage. Keep in mind, there are always two ways to see things. Her way and your's. You'll both will probably have to compromise some sort of meeting half way in this whole thing. Best wishes to you both~

Answer 6

Don't assume she is cheating, and don't accuse her. Yes, it is normal for women to have a lot of discharge. Sex usually doesn't cause a lot of discharge. It's infections that cause it, although some women just have discharge. Sounds like you two should go to counseling because there's some stuff that is not being talked about between the two of you, but it's not necessarily because she is cheating. Also, women get very stressed over kids, work, etc. I have the same issues with my husband about sex. I don't like to have sex as often as he does. See if she'll go to counseling. Also, have you ever tried going to church or going somewhere that could give you help? Some people are more comfortable talking to a priest or other religious person, as opposed to a psychologist. My husband is that way.

Answer 7

Maybe you need to set an appointment with her so that you all can talk about your feeling for one another. Maybe she is making her career more important because she feels that you don't love her. There just might be only a communication problem there and neither of you really knows how the other really feels.

Answer 8

Men do it all the time, and they are praised for being good providers. Women can seldom do anything right, no matter which way they go, without someone saying they are slacking off on one of their duties. Maybe you two just aren't a good match. She will resent you if you stop her from enjoying her career just so she can always be available to please you. I think you two need to talk to see if you can resolve this problem. Just remember that she is a person too, not just your mate.

Answer 9

Tell her how your feeling. Ask her why is the marrige last in the list and a career first. Maybe if her career is seeming more important then she may have found someone else at work she likes or maybe she just really likes her job.

Answer 10

I think your wife just loves what she does for a living. The fact that you are asking this question can cause difficulties in the future. Love her...she is hard working,and that is a hard quality to find. But if you have a really big problem with this sit down one day and talk to her about it CALMLY do not raise your voice.