for married people only!!!!?

Question

how long was the "adjustment" in your marriage ? (ive been married for 8 months and i want all our fighting and arguing to be over)

Answer 1

I've been married for nearly a year now (it will be a year on October 15) and we've never really fought. We've had a few disagreements in the 2+ years we've been together, but never a fight. So if you are fighting all the time then maybe you need to grow up and learn what healthy communication is.

Answer 2

You have to remember that you are two different people. SOme people have tempers and are very irritable and are not willing to budge at all. These are the people that when looking for apartments, they put things like, "I hate people" or I can't live with people". These people will never make it as a married person, becasue they are not willing to change thier life style. Marriage is a huge change. I hated my wife the first year or so we were married, but after learning to put my clothes in the hamper and not the floor and her learning to deal with the fact that Sunday is for Football, we get along a lot better. You will have to compromise a little bit, as will he. I don;t know what you are fighting about, but it may be best to let him win one. A little bit of space goes a long way.

Godd luck

Answer 3

3 years

Answer 4

Adjustments in marriage might take forever. Fighting and arguing will never stop, honey. If there's one thing I've learned in my more than 6 years of marriage. . . it's PATIENCE. You have to accept your partner as she/he is and learn to live with it. You know why? You can never change a person unless he/she really wants to. Would you? Marriage is work, work and work if you really want it to succeed.

Also, you have to be realistic. Stop living in a fairy tale. Usually, specially women, have high expectations from their partner. It's because of what we see in the movies or read in romantic novels. We have pictured our man as our knight in shining armor or a prince charming. You would only end up disappointed. Real life marriage is far from that. And is definitely different during those courtship and engagement days.

But let not this turn you off. Marriage can be a wonderful thing. It's very important for both of you to want to work it out. Let not small things get in way. And if things get rough, always remember why you married him/her and the love you shared.

Lastly, never forget to pray and ask for guidance. The Lord knows what's best for you. Are you still wondering why you end up together?

Have a blissful life. God bless!

Answer 5

I have been married for almost 2 years and the adjustment was easy for us. All married couples fight sometime. I know we have little fights sometimes. What you need to do is to look at what you are fighting about and if it really matters if not I would quit fighting about it. If it is something that matters I would try to settle it so that it does not tear your marriage apart. Good Luck with your marriage.

Answer 6

It'll just take a while for you two to get used to each other. The main thing is that both of you need to communicate, and think about each other FIRST. If you both can do that, then the fighting and arguing will be very minimal. Me and my wife have been together for over 10 years, and married for around 8 1/2 years. I can count on one hand, how many fights (arguements is a better word) we've had, since the beginning. I tell her everything, she tells me everything, and we think of each other first all the time. It really works for us, plus our love just gets deeper and deeper (in my opinion). I can only hope that you and him can have the relationship that me and my wife have. I wish you the best of luck in the future.........

Answer 7

As long as you label "discussions or debates" as "fights" it will never be over. We've been married 16 years and rarely (if ever) fight. Do we agree on everything? No. Stuff that's important to her (or is a "button" for her), I let slide. Stuff that's important/button to me, she lets slide. We even joke about the discussions. Her desk is pretty messy (annoys me sometimes). If I start to bring it up, one of us (usually me, sometimes her) will say, "discussion #425" (make up any number you want). Essentially, we already know how the discussion is going to go. We know each other's positions and we know how it will resolve. Why debate and risk it turning into an argument. If there are "issues" between you, try talking about them in public (if you're the types that don't argue in public). Social pressures make it more likely you can TALK about the issues rather than argue. A number of folks say, "relationships without arguments are boring" - whatever. I've been in both. IMO, no arguments is the only way to fly.

Answer 8

We have started to calm down from the adjustment. We have been married for 2 months but living together for 2 years. Good luck!!

Answer 9

I am going on 9 years and things get easier but you have different things to fight over. We dont fight about him squeezing the toothpaste from the middle cuz now I buy the toothpaste that isnt in a tube. We compromised. We used to fight about once or twice a month or less or more. We have gone through stages where we go for one or 2 fights a month but we have gone through stages where it seems like we are fighting everyday. Then there are the times when it has been like forever since you fought.

Answer 10

we've been in a relationship for 6 years before we got married so we did not fight and argue that much anymore when we were married. but time will come when both of you get tired of arguing and fighting over small things especially when bigger problems comes. like having kids or buying a house. you will be working together to solve these problems.

Answer 11

I've been married 10 months and the adjustment came naturally...we've known each other for 3 years though...what are you guys fighting about??