i have a 3yr. old little sister and when my dad goes to work its just me her my mom and my other 4 yr. old sister she is really good around us she listens she doesnt hit and shes just a little good girl around us but when my dad comes home shes starts being really bad shes starts hitting my 4 yr. old sister and my 4yr. old sister wont hit back cause she knows shes not supposed to fight but my other sister is soo bad shes says shut up a and shes just plain rude when he comes home she will go up to you and hit you for no reason i think she might have ADD but my dad wont believe me what do you think ?is there any tips so i can make her be nicer ? do you think she had ADD?
2006-07-10 05:27:46 · 27 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
but he gives her alot of attention when he comes home
2006-07-10 05:31:35 · update #1
Sounds like she really wants your dad's attention is all.
2006-07-10 05:29:22 · answer #1 · answered by Tact is highly overrated 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps your three year old sister feels that she is not getting enough attention. Maybe the 4 year old sister is seen as a "better" child and therefor has been given a lot of positive reinforcement. This is not bad, but if the 3 year old has not had much positive reinforcement as well, even if her behavior is not as "good", she may be responding by getting equivilant attention.
Think about it, when she behaves badly she gets a lot of attention from everyone. Doesn't she? Because her and the 4 year old sister are close in age, she is probably just thriving for attention and is behaving badly to get it.
Your Mom might Try This Tips
1) Stop reinforcing bad behaviors. Do not tolerate bad behavior, but do not reward her by giving her the desired attention (even spankings or being "talked to" is getting attention). Nominate a quiet place for her as time out place. Parenting experts say that the age of children is the amount of time they should be put in time out. So if your sister is three, than three minutes should be enough.
When you go to put her in time out do not raise your voice. Say her name, "Sarah time out" Firmly, but not loud. Do not accept no. Even if she screams and cries and fights...
Time out will remove her from attention and (as long as everyone doesn't make a big fuss about it, giving her attention) she will learn that bad behavior results in the loss of attention rather than what she desires.
2) Also praise her when she does good things. Make sure that everyone in the family spends 10 minutes a day alone with her (and the 4 year old). One-on-one time can really make a difference. This alone may help level out her problems.
Good Luck
2006-07-10 05:35:26 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your father doesn't discipline her or pay much attention to her does he, that's why she's doing it. You don't have ADD half the time and then not have it the other half of the time. Actually I don't believe in ADD for the most part. You father needs to start disciplining her and paying her good attention or else she is going to be more of a terror as she gets older.
Ignore her when she acts like that, don't pay any mind. She's looking for attention from her dad. But pay lots of attention to her when she is good. Hug her and tell her what a good kid she is when she behaves like that. Tell her once that you will love her when she behaves properly and not pay her any mind when she throws tantrums, and really do it. Walk away, ignore her, don't respond. If she hits you, ignore it. Hopefully she will eventually catch the drift. It's hard though because your are here sister and not her parent.
Good Luck.
2006-07-10 05:34:02 · answer #3 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if she really had ADD she would behave that way all the time. There is something going on with the relationship between her and your father if she only behaves that way when he comes around. Maybe she does it for his attention or she could be doing it because she knows she wont get in trouble with him around. There could be a lot of other reasons but your Dad is definitely part of the equation.
2006-07-10 05:31:42 · answer #4 · answered by Brandy O 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she has ADD . . . she is daddy's little princess . . . spoiled by daddy.
When dad is at work . . . she is good . . . behaves and treat you all okay. When daddy come home, she turns from Jekyll to Hyde . . . because she knows she can get away with it. Daddy won't do anything . . . because she is his Princess.
My suggest . . . take a video camera . . . hide it . . . and when she come in the room start recording (most cameras have remotes). After you recording committing this violent crimes . . . you can do one of two things . . .
1) show the tape to your father . . . for him to discipline her
2) show the tape to the brat . . . and tell her to treat you right and stop misbehaving or daddy is going to get a copy of it.
My suggestion is the first one . . . and open communication with your father . . . so you can approach him and discuss when his little Princess is acting like a little ***** (I censored it myself - it wasn't yahoo . . . because I know I am talking with a minor - but you know what I mean.) Your father . . . will rely on you for information . . . because you would be more trustworthy . . .
Also . . . may I ask . . . what about your mom . . . what does she do?
2006-07-14 09:31:47 · answer #5 · answered by Tag Your It 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think she has ADD. What it sounds like is your sister really wants your dad's attention and is determined to get it anyway she can. Children view negative attention as attention nonetheless. It seems like her acting out is a way to provoke attention from your father. You should observe whether she behaves the same way on days when your dad doesn't work or on vacations.
2006-07-10 05:34:52 · answer #6 · answered by Ixy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she knows what mom will let her get away. Sounds like dad ignores her more than she would like so she acts up in an attempt to gain his attention. I think ADD is a load of crap, it is more a lack of proper parenting. I have noticed that kids who are diagnosed with ADD invariably are highly intelligent. As a result it takes more to keep them interested and they get bored easily. This is misdiagnosed as a learning disability...in reality the problem is the teacher is not making the subject interesting enough to hold the child's attention. Does dad walk in the door and pick her up and give her hugs as soon as he walks in? If not perhaps you could suggest it to him. It might solve the problem.
2006-07-10 05:39:42 · answer #7 · answered by William E 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She doesn't have ADD. She has issues with your father. I'm guessing that she's upset he goes to work and thinks that he doesn't give her enough attention. Acting out is her way of telling him "Hey I miss you and want you to pay more attention to me!!!"
Ask the dad to do some one on one things with her. Like take her to the zoo or the park or even just read a book to her
2006-07-10 05:32:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she wants your dad's attention, whether it's positive or negative. He needs to pay a little more attention to her. How is she when he's home in the morning?
2006-07-10 05:31:28 · answer #9 · answered by ♥ Sarah Bear ♥ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She wants your Dad's attention. He needs to give her a little bit more attention. No ADD.
2006-07-10 05:29:56 · answer #10 · answered by Fishgutts 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think she's has issues with your dad.
Children with ADD do NOT act up sometimes, and really good other times. There is a factor here that is playing a part. YOU DAD!
2006-07-10 05:30:51 · answer #11 · answered by Lynda C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋