Do you have any favorite misheard song lyrics?

Question

For example I thought Ozzie was saying "I tell you to end your life, I wish I could but it's too late." The lyrics really go..."I tell you to ENJOY LIFE..." Wow. Two different messages!

Jeepwife reminded me of another...same awful song..."FOUR HUNDRED children and a crop in the fields"...I used to wonder what the prob was, lots of kids to put to work on them crops, y'know?

These are all wonderful examples! Thank you. Can't choose, of course. We'll let the smart people pick!

Answer 1

Manfred Mann, "Blinded by the Light"

My friend thought he said "wrapped up like a douche..."

(It's deuce)

Answer 2

This happens to be the best as it also has visuals to it:
http://www.rathergood.com/alf/

and the rest are as follows:

Rod Stewart, Maggie May
The real lyrics are:
"All you did was wreck my bed"
Misheard as:
"All you did was wet my bed"

Blondie's, "The Tide Is High"
Misheard Lyrics:
The tide is high, but I'm moving on.
Original Lyrics:
The tide is high, but I'm holding on.

Elton John's, "Goodbye Yellow Brick Road"
Misheard Lyrics:
What do you think you'll do, then?
I'll banish you down the drain.
Original Lyrics:
What do you think you'll do then?
I bet that'll shoot down your plane.

Little Feat's, "Fat Man In The Bathtub"
Misheard Lyrics:
Don't want nobody who won't dime for dance
Don't want no speedcars, 'cause I'm not that kind.
Original Lyrics:
Don't want nobody who won't dive for dimes
Don't want no speedballs, 'cause I might die trying.

Phish's, "Drowned"
Misheard Lyrics:
Let me recall
That the Titans have set me free.
Original Lyrics:
Let me be calm
Let the tide in and set me free.

Queen's, "Save Me"
Misheard Lyrics:
Years of care and loyalty
Nothing but a shattered scene.
Original Lyrics:
Years of care and loyalty
Were nothing but a sham, it seems.


Billy Ocean's, "Caribbean Queen (No More Love On The Run)"
Misheard Lyrics:
Caribou queen
Now with Sherry Neusantrie.
Original Lyrics:
Caribbean queen
Now we're sharing the same dream.

Crowded House's, "Don't Dream It's Over"
Misheard Lyrics:
Hey now, hey now
Don't treat me sober.
Original Lyrics:
Hey now, hey now
Don't dream, it's over.

Damn Yankees', "High Enough"
Misheard Lyrics:
Can you take me higher?
Original Lyrics:
Can you take me high enough?

David Bowie's, "Life On Mars"
Misheard Lyrics:
Take a look at her long hair hitting on the wrong guy.
Original Lyrics:
Take a look at the lawman beating on the wrong guy.

Duran Duran's, "Girls On Film"
Misheard Lyrics:
Too many Taylors
Original Lyrics:
Two minutes later

Answer 3

I swear, the first time I heard 'Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini', I heard it diffenently from every other hearing. It was long ago, and I still can't be sure I was wrong. But this ending is what I remember:

Now she's afraid to come of the water
And I wonder what she's gonna do
Now she's afraid to come out of the water
And the poor little girl's turnin' blue
***(Two, three, four, what was washed up on the shore?)***

It was an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka-dot bikini
That she'd worn for the first time today
An itsy teenie weenie yellow polka-dot bikini
So in the water she wanted to stay

(From the locker to the blanket)
(From the blanket to the shore)
(From the shore to the water)
***Now she's wearing nothing more***

(Two, three, four, tell the people what she wore)
NOTHING!

In the '60's? I doubt it!!!

Answer 4

In my family we have a bunch of misheard Beatles lyrics. When I was five, I thought "She's got a ticket to ride" was "She's got a chicken who flies". And my mom used to think "Can't buy me love" was "It's Bobby Love"!

Also, in Paul McCartney's song "Uncle Albert" she thought the line "He had to have the berth" was "He had to have a bath". That song has weird enough lyrics anyway!

Answer 5

Madonna's Ray of Light

Actual Lyric- And I feel like I just got home

What I sang loudly in my car- And I feel like a disco phone.

What the hay is a disco phone? Who knows, I figure MAdonna knew....

Answer 6

Khe Sanh by Cold Chisel

Misheard: "Well, the last train out of Sydney's almost gone"

Actual: "Well the last plane out of Sydney's almost gone"

(The song is about soldiers going to fight in the Vietnam War- you can't exactly take the train can you)

Answer 7

That bad Celine Dion Song.I think it's the theme from the Titanic and she sings about the hot dogs will go on.

Answer 8

Louis Armstrong's "It's a Wonderful World"

"The Bright blessed day/The dogs say 'good night'"

(The dark, sacred night)

I had a friend who looked for years for the Neil Diamond tune "Reverend Blue jeans"

(It's Forever in Blue Jeans")

And we will NOT discuss Shocking Blue's "Venus"

(I'm your penis? I'm your fetus?)

Answer 9

There's a word for this: Mondegreen. Check out Jon Carroll's web site (he's a columnist for the San Francisco Chronicle and has been collecting them for years).
http://www.sfgate.com/columnists/carroll/mondegreens.shtml has a gabunch of them.

"You don't need a pinhead
Just to hang around." (it turns out it's a PENNY that you don't need) Creedence Clearwater Revival song -- I know, I know. I'm OLLLLLDDD.

Answer 10

My friend thought AFI was saying, "Hey man, it's AFI. Would you like some pie?"
The actual lyrics are, "Hey Miss Murder can I? Make beauty stay? If I? Take my life?"