For the moms out there........Is it wrong for a dad to let his daughter sleep in the same bed with him.?

Question

My daughter is 9 and we had a wonderful relationship until the divorce. Her mom had an affair and Janea's world was shaken when I left. Since then however. Our relationship has suffered. The divorce was hurtful to her. My daughter has been going to therapy for over a year now. I saw my daughter over the week end and she wanted me to sleep in her bed. She has been emotionally stunted by about 2 years so emotionally she is 7.

Answer 1

For crying out loud your her father. Of course its alright to sleep with your daughter, if she doesn't mind. I wouldn't bring the fear of close physical contact with your children, that many of all these other people in the world have, into your own home.
I think she could do with a father that isn't afraid of her. Of course doo gooder christians in so called family community services will hit the ceiling. But its not like they have an ounce of love spare for loving unknown children, after giving it to the law. So stuff 'em.
Therapy may be a bad idea also.
Be the boss. I'm sure she needs to feel stability. If you cant give it, then who else can?

Answer 2

I do not know how are you doing in your divorce. I never have seen a really wonderful relationship that ends up suddenly in a divorce if both sides are already mature.
About your daugther, be careful.
Child abuse is always difficult to deny and easily used by a furious wife that raised a child. Even thinking that your ex-wife is not planning such a thing, a kid that wants the parents to be together at any price can also trigger a misunderstanding related with the subject.
When I was a child I used to go with my father to bed and took me years of therapy to try to know in fact what happened every time that my father and me were sharing bed together. Made me feel terrible guilty, and my parents were not divorced by that time.
Very delicate subject indeed.

Answer 3

Whether she is 7 or 9, it is not a healthy thing for a girl to sleep with her father. Maybe sitting next to her bed until she falls asleep would be a wiser alternative. Does your ex wife have a man sleep over and your daughter sees this? Maybe she just needs physical affection like hugs, but sleeping with her is not good. Men upon waking in the morning can have an erection and what if your daughter saw this or even worse, rubbed up against it? Come on, you're a grown man and shouldnt even be asking this question.......you know damn well what the answer is.

Answer 4

I think it is wrong for a dad to be sleeping in the same bed as his daughter. She should have her own room..her own bed and space.. She should definitely sleep in a bed of her own and not sharing a bed with anyone else let alone her Dad.. Its unhealthy. How long would this go on for if not stopped now. She is 9 and at this age will be growing up fast.. A bit of encouragement and training will guide her to be independent and extra therapy sessions will help her to see the need for privacy a young girl should have and confidence to sleep in her own room.

Answer 5

No, I've known girls who were molested by their fathers and this is how it starts. It starts innocent enough but it can turn from that very quickly. It also leaves the day open to false accusations. How would he defend himself in court? If it's just a one time thing while maybe. But it opens a whole can of worms

Answer 6

im a mum of 3 kids. i dont think it is right for this to happen. it may have occurencies in the future and im sure you realy dont want to face that. so why dont you try letting her sleep in her bed why you are in the room with her. just be there for her make bed time fun time. put on a dvd for her to watch at night and let her sleep in her own time. play a game of cards. let her do some reading etc before bed time. just pop your head in her room every so often to see if she is ok. she will eventualy get over it..after my divorce i had to tend to 3 kids. and yes it has affects on children. but this can pass with help of parents. being strong. you will face problems if you give in to this.

Answer 7

i think there is a thin line here...i, personally, don't see a thing wrong with it, but, the way the world is getting...i wouldn't advertise that i did it...
if you are a sensitive dad, then i see no harm there...however, if you have something else on your plate...you will do more harm than good.
i sense you are genuinely concerned about your daughter and see no harm on the surface, but, i would definately look for other ways to comfort her (even at 7, it is too old to need a parent at night)

Answer 8

I think she just wants to feel close to her dad and there is nothing wrong with that so many weirdo's out there make it hard for us decent parents to feel comfortable comforting our children i think it's great you are taking her to therapy so many parents forget the in pact on children. if you are uncomfortable with it lay with her until she is asleep and pull up a mattress on the floor good luck sunshine

Answer 9

OK, Pop...the kid is 9 years old....that could be a problem. I'd say she could lay beside you/or you beside her for a little while to be comforted; then be encouraged to go to her own bed. This will set a pattern that she can come to you for comfort and then return to her own bed for sleep. Why don't you ask her therapist?

Answer 10

divorce is always hard on a child.just love and comfort her.I would say no it is not wrong but u may want to ask her therapist about it as he might feel that will be a set back 4 her.