is there any person in your past besides the one you are with or your hubby that you will always love and can't ever completly get off your mind. i mean i love my hubby and know i am better of with him but i still wander what if. and how do you stop that what if? and it has been many years
2006-07-09 15:44:26 · 15 answers · asked by LOLO 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
love you answers so far makes me know i aint the only one
2006-07-09 15:54:15 · update #1
Yes!!! I think about 2 women of my past EVERY day. No kidding.
The first was my wife back in 1997. We were married for only a short time because about 4 months before the wedding we both drifted apart a bit. We got married anyway (young kids) and realized that we were going in two very different directions!!! It was a tough period and I haven't ever really forgiven myself for my part in these events (nothing bad, just immaturity).
The other was my stylist for 2 1/2 years. She was gorgeous and we always had a connection. It was not too long but was some very memorable moments and the best physical relationship I've had. She just wasn't a strong enough person with outside things going on and it broke us up.
I haven't stopped thinking about them but have been able to move on thinking like you are in that you are better out of that relationship. I realized that even thought those 2 were very meaningful in my life, it was just a period of my life that was meant to be filled with them. It may not dissolve the pain but certainly takes the edge off at times.
I empathize with you, good luck and keep looking to the future.
2006-07-10 12:41:33 · answer #1 · answered by ZIAGACITY 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I know the feeling. There was a guy, a long time ago, that took my heart and then smashed it into a million pieces, but I still think about him every now and then - even talk to him once a year or so (my hubby knows). I wouldn't trade my hubby for a million other men, but the other guy will always have a special place in my heart - the part that he left when he shattered it.
2006-07-09 22:51:56 · answer #2 · answered by The Nana of Nana's 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for 9 years. I love my husband completely and will never stray...but I've got an old flame...and he crosses my mind occasionally. I'll pass him on the street every once in a while and think of old times. I'll hear an old song that reminds me of him or run across an old friend who mentions his name. I'll never forget him, or the fact that he was the best kisser I will ever know in my lifetime since my husband will be the last man I'll ever kiss and the best at many other things. But....my old flame has a place in my memory...and maybe a tiny one in my heart. Don't beat urself up about it yours! Who knows....maybe an old flame lies somewhere in your husbands memories. Just don't ask him about his and never tell him about yours and you'll have a happy marriage!
2006-07-09 23:12:51 · answer #3 · answered by katie p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't stop the what if. But if you're making a story out of it in your mind about the other guy you could add onto the story and make it an awful one and not the built up fantasy in your mind. Bring it back down to reality.
2006-07-09 22:53:01 · answer #4 · answered by fuhreezing 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you believe you are better off with your hubby, then the best thing to do is try not to compare him to the previous guy. This will only sabotage the good thing you have going now. Appreciate it.
2006-07-09 22:51:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hun you are not alone!!! It is better for your marriage if both of you have loved and lost before. It is easier for the two of you to understand how much your love for each other really means. My hubby and I both have someone we will always hold dear to us and part of us will always love them. Don't feel bad about it, like I said it helps your relationship now.
2006-07-09 23:50:28 · answer #6 · answered by fussy41404 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
We all had another love before we married; the thing about it is that we married the one that was right for us. Memories are just that memories of a time when youth was youth and fun was fun.
Keep in mind that love is a crazy thing and that we lived for those moments.....yesterday is best left in the past.... Sometimes it is a song that reminds us of lost love....smile inside and stroll down memory-lane in your mind.
2006-07-09 23:02:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg, ya know, the "first love" is so amazing... mine wasnt even mutual, but he was kind to me about the whole thing... i thought about him daily for about 15 years!!! we had sent letters, shared poetry, some phone calls... when i was married, it was horrible, and i would dream about him coming back into my life, even though we lived miles away from each other, and had no longer kept in contact...i began dating the TRUE love of my life after my divorce, and one day, just a few months ago, i "stumbled" upon some 'bits and pieces' of this guy while searching classmates.com (checking out his school, just outta curiousity) and his recent pic, with him and his wife and new baby girl, made me smile... it was nice to see him again, nice to see his family and how happy they seem... but, most importantly, that was just it... it was nice, and i realized how awesome my guy is now, and actually, yes, the old flame was nice, even sexy, but he just doesnt compare to my mike... i havent tried to contact him... i havent really thought about him since, until this Q... but, i do still have the letters and poems he's written for me... i'm sure i always will.
2006-07-09 23:11:59 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My first real love from college (over 25 years ago). I just divorced about 2 years ago and actually contacted her. She's married and actually lives less than an hour away (she actually lived in Colorado and me in California when we dated). It was nice to talk to her and I'm glad that she's happy with her life. I'm moving on with mine as well.
2006-07-09 22:50:59 · answer #9 · answered by Phillip B 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is one guy that i still think about sometime that i dated before my husband but i do not have no more feels for him or love him , because i am in love with my husband that i have being married to almost 9 yrs and got two beautiful kids together
2006-07-09 22:51:26 · answer #10 · answered by angel h 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋