Me and my husband have been married for 4 years now and have a 4 year old daughter. We love each other and everything but it seems like he never wants to be around me. I am constantly telling him we need to do more stuff together like watch movies and go out. But all he wants to do is go into the opposite room and watch nascar and sports. It was not like this the first couple of years we been married, but it has gotten worse and it seems that we keep on getting further apart from each other. It has gotten to a point where we hardly have a sex life, i am always the one that has to start it, and when very seldomly he does, he falls asleep before anything gets started. Is there anything i can do to get him to pay more attention to me? Ive tried talking to him about it and everything and he thinks we spend enough time together.
2006-07-09 14:44:10 · 17 answers · asked by Linds 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was in a similiar situation...
I had been living with the 'love of my life' for three years, but there came a point when I wondered, if he loves me so much, why is it such a hassle to spend time with me?
Maybe you are both, nice caring people, but not necessarily right for each other. I would have a serious chat with him, and if he doesn't stop neglecting you, you need to love yourself enough to end it before you become seriously depressed (if you aren't already).
There is better out there! You and your daughter deserve all the love and happiness life has to offer!
Take care!
2006-07-09 14:53:34 · answer #1 · answered by Marilyn Monroe 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You both need to go to counseling before it's too late! Otherwise, you will be looking for an attorney. Apparently, there isn't any communication going on between the two of you and that is a very crucial ingrediant to a successful marriage.
Maybe he's under a lot of stress (family, work, money in general, etc.) or maybe your relationship has run aground, so to speak, and you need something rather radical to reignite the spark.
Try talking to him about how you feel and ask if he has any suggestions on where to start working things out.
Good luck!
2006-07-09 14:51:16 · answer #2 · answered by Angie P. 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's stupid, or he's not telling you the real reason
which is still stupid on his part, or your not telling us something.
That would be denial.
Otherwise -- I wouldn't live a sexless life or one were I had to do all the work (same goes for the men in this spot). You have a four year old. Leave (don't bang around) -- wait untill he calls and then give him the this marriage shapes up 50/50 or we're done. You both have a four year. But if you don't resolve the sex issues his SELFISH behavior will result in you eventually stepping out.
2006-07-09 14:54:28 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get a babysitter for a weekend and plan a mini-vacation for you and hubby. Pack his stuff so he has no excuse not to go...tell him anything to get him in the car!!! Maybe take him to a car race (you already know he likes that) or a ball game...something he likes. Buy yourself a sexy nighty and a bottle of good wine. THEN...give the man some attention without whining in his face when he gets home. JESUS....!!! If you show him an ounce of attention he'll be interested again. How about you? How do you look and feel about yourself? Show him a self-assured woman. Take him dancing, karaoke, line dancing...whatever! If you give an inch, maybe he will too. Make it a real DATE once a month. Your can't neglect your man!
2006-07-09 14:56:36 · answer #4 · answered by Sassy OLD Broad 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i'm not positive a thanks to respond to about all of your issues, yet easily do not divorce your husband. in accordance to what you've written, he hasn't finished something incorrect, except the booty dance i will admit. 'I have a strong husband, we bypass out dancing, buying he's my best pal we've conventional a strong marriage, my little ones are nicely behaved little ones', do you want to throw all of that away? you'll lose a husband, a lover, a pal, a best pal, you could have hurting little ones puzzled and asking questions. i imagine it will be extra of a loss than you comprehend. Do you even comprehend what percentage different halves can't nonetheless say that their husband is their best pal?! truly, in case your sister is having this impression, throw her out. it isn't your situation, you tried to be there, you opened your doors. And now she is threatening to smash your satisfied existence. sit down your husband down, don't be mad, in simple terms extremely tell him how a lot you're hurting. It must have taken lots that you'll believe any guy, so enable him understand your concerns on your spouse and youngsters. yet please, do not divorce him. each and every relations and couple have problematic situations to artwork by skill of, and this appears to be like one in all those situations. when you're open and trustworthy, you'll come by skill of stronger interior the full. you're sister's happiness is not your situation, once your spouse and youngsters is threatened, she should be out. yet you'd be an aunt to her little ones. Take care.
2016-10-14 07:14:21 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Consider marriage counseling. Whether or not you did to seek counseling, tell him how you feel using only the words "I feel....". Do not use the words "we should" or "you should". When you start talking to him in terms of how you feel you will probably get in better touch with your own feelings and subsequently convey to him how you truly feel about things.
Also, be sure to seperate thinking from feeling. Feelings are neither right nor wrong, they just exist. Thoughts and actions are either right or wrong. Be sure he understands this concept too and then talk it out. Good luck!
2006-07-09 14:59:58 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You did talk to him and his lame answer was you do spend time together and you left it like that? I would of insisted on more communication from him. You both need to get to the bottom of this or your marriage will be over. Good Luck!!!
2006-07-09 14:59:57 · answer #7 · answered by Linda R 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At least we know you are doing you part. At this point, it is best to seek professional help; there is nothing wrong in doing this. You need to start from somewhere otherwise you will be miserable, and that is not healthy at all.
2006-07-09 14:59:51 · answer #8 · answered by ProArtWork 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
one of or all of the following
your over weight not sexy any more
you look old and not attractive walk around with roller is your hair
your not giving up the booty or not enough
the house is a mess and he's sick of it
he's tired of eating a McDonalds or hamburger helper
when you talk to him you are complaining about something
there is sexy young hottie at work thats got his attention and you
do not stack up
2006-07-09 14:56:45 · answer #9 · answered by zqx357 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you should go on some kind of vacation I know that when me and my boyfriend had that problem we went on a romantic vacation and it seems like now we are perfectly fine.
2006-07-09 14:49:35 · answer #10 · answered by izzydwight 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋