I have been seeing this man for a 4 months. He is still married to wife no.4, he doesn't have the money yet to get a divorce but he hopes she will. She moved to another town and she calls once in a while wanting to get back together but he never answers and calls her a *****. He said it was her fault that she left him after she tripped and tried to blame it on him. I know a mutal friend who happens to know this lady's family and they said she came back all bruised and hurt from him. Now I am wondering what to believe. He is in his 50's and has young childrren still living at home and he still takes the advise of his mother, this has bothered me alot, but the thing of it he has told me he loves and wants to marry me as soon as he is divorced. I have not told him I love him as he is moving fast for me plus at my age I am not sure how I can deal with children that age. I seem to care for him but wondering now why so many wives and he says they all mistreated him. Could this be true?
2006-07-09 12:15:21 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She has not called about getting back together meant to say to see the children. I heard she loves the children even though they weren't hers
2006-07-09 12:17:29 · update #1
They have lived apart for a year
2006-07-09 12:27:51 · update #2
I was in a situation similar to yours. It's a red flag if a man cannot say anything good about any of his many exes. My ex said that they were all *****s and that they were all cheating on him and were always hateful towards him. Well what do you know, he turned out to be extremely jealous, accused me of cheating which I never did, I left him with bruises. And surprise-surprise, I now understand why his exes were so "hateful". He was also pushing our relationship forward way too fast, claiming that he loves me and wants to marry me a month or two into the relationship. This is another red flag for you. Men who rush you into marriage and seem to be too enthusiastic about you too soon tend to be posessive. So I don't know how many more red flags you need. Please don't do it to yourself.
2006-07-09 13:22:20 · answer #1 · answered by anonymous 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All I have to say is DAH??????????????? Get a f$$$$ clue! He is a married man, until he is divorced... and you have no business with a married man. That is numero uno. Then look at the fact that he has been married four times? hmmmmmmm doesnt that tell you something? Good lord! Are you real????? I wouldnt touch that situation with a ten foot pole. Also, would you ever really be able to trust the man? I will tell you this. I was married to a man who was a MOMMYS boys. Its was totally miserable. See the signs woman! I am not trying to be mean here, but see the signs. You already have the answers inside of you... your second guessing this... therefore, LEAVE IT ALONE or at the very minimum... give this a lottttttt of time. Having small children at home? WOW! Think about this? Dont you think that the best thing for him to do for those children would to be " Work it out with his wife?" You dont want to look like a home wrecker to them do you? I am telling you this because I have been there... done that... it was the WORST mistake of my life!
2006-07-09 12:32:31 · answer #2 · answered by JOAN L 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like you already know you don't want to be with him. Time to move on.......anyone that is in his 50's, married 4 times, and can't afford to divorce the last wife (make no mention of the bruises, etc), is no good for anyone. Get out while you still can........
2006-07-09 12:39:47 · answer #3 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I would run! Your gut instinct is telling you something and you need to listen. Just becouse you have feelings for this man does not mean you should be with him. That's alot of baggage for you to take on. I 'd almost promise you it will only get worse as time goes on. Nip it now, before you grow any fonder of him. Love can be blind.
2006-07-09 13:34:37 · answer #4 · answered by Jeanna P 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run, Forrest, Run! They "all" didn't mistreat him. He's just looking for another mommy to marry when he's done with no. 4. Wish I could write to her and tell her to borrow the money from the devil if need be to divorce him. Run, run, run! Don't look back!
2006-07-09 12:58:25 · answer #5 · answered by HelpOneAnother 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My friend married a man who had been married three other times. Later she found out why. He was selfish, demanding, and hard to live with.
2006-07-09 12:54:30 · answer #6 · answered by compu illiterate 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Number 5???? I DO NOT THINK SO!!! There might have been one, possibly two bad ones out of 4, but not all of them.! No, HE is the bad one! Avoid him like the plague!! Get out while the gettin's good.
2006-07-09 12:37:59 · answer #7 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Run child run quickly before you are trip and fall number 5
2006-07-09 12:20:18 · answer #8 · answered by Deborah M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Certainly got a lot of issues. Let him work out his life first before you get really serious. That is unless of course you are into " baggage handling". Your decision, your life...don't get mad when it's all fouled up with his gunk.
2006-07-09 13:41:38 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been there, done that, does not work and
YOU, YOU, YOU, yes, you are worth more than this mess.
Move on , don't be #5...there are inherent problems that can't be "fixed" by you--beleive me!
Tough at first, but don't waste your time energy gifts and life--please think more of yourself !!!
2006-07-09 13:03:52 · answer #10 · answered by susieque 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋