Latin cushion?

Question

Ok. This is a strange one. I was given this cushion by a friend, with a latin inscription on it. Can get a few individual words but making sense of the whole is beyond me.

Would be grateful for a clear translation:

LOQUERIS.
Si vis me flere, Dolendum est
Telephe vel Peleu male si ipsi
DORMITABO AUT MANDATA
on satis est pulchra
Ridentibus adrident, ita
RIDEBO

(I suspect it is actually just nonsense... the caps are as on the cushion)

Answer 1

Apparently the poem should read:

Ut ridentibus adrident, ita flentibus adflent
humani vultus. Si vis me flere, dolendum est
primum ipsi tibi: tum tua me infortunia laedent,
Telephe vel Peleu; male si mandata loqueris,
aut dormitabo aut ridebo.

And the translation is:

With those that smile, our face in smiles appears;
With those that weep, we burst into tears.
If you wish me to weep,
you yourself must first feel grief.
So I shall feel your sorrows like my own,
O Peleus or Telephus!
But if your language is not suitable
for the circumstances, I’ll sleep, or smile

Here is where I found that gem of information:
http://beingmrkenny.co.uk/blog/2006/04/loqueris-si-vis-me-flere-dolendum-est/
So we owe our thanks to an unknown Jimbo!

And see also here:
http://experts.about.com/q/Latin-2145/Loqueris-si-vis.htm

Answer 2

With those that smile, our face in smiles appears;
With those that weep, we burst into tears.
If you wish me to weep,
you yourself must first feel grief.
So I shall feel your sorrows like my own,
O Peleus or Telephus!
But if your language is not suitable
for the circumstances, I’ll sleep, or smile

Answer 3

Hey dude. This sounds like some old school Euro witchcraft . Throw that SH!T out immediately !!!!

Answer 4

Loqueris.
If you wish me to cry, Painful it is
and the rest is hard to find, but check out the link.

Answer 5

hot latina chick dude!