What should I do about my wife?

Question

I'm in Iraq right now and I enjoy calling and talking to my wife. Everytime we talk though, she finds someway and some how to bring up all my past relationships and girlfriends. All she do is just nag nag nag about them and it pisses me off. I tried tslking to her about it but she is stubborn. I haven't called her in 2 days, what should I do?

Answer 1

You are seperated, you're in a scary part of the world, and she is angry that you are far away and possibly in danger. For whatever reason, she doesn't want to fight about that--either you're earning a lot of money for the family or you're in the armed services and doing your duty--so she expresses her anger by fighting about the other thing. She's your wife, you love one another--even if you annoy one another on the phone--so, the next time you speak and this comes up, stay calm. Reassure her that the only past you care about is the one you share with her, and tell her that you know she's concerned, but you will be home soon, in one piece, and you love her and only think about her. If she insists on bringing up your past, gently remind her that you miss her so much you don't want to waste time talking about girls you don't think about, you want to spend the phone call just listening to her sweet voice. Good luck, and be well.

Answer 2

I think the stress that is between you is not to do with past relationships, or anything else. It is a very stressful thing to have your husband be in a war torn country, where things are so unsettled and not knowing what will happen, and being so far apart. It must stir things up inside of her, right or wrong. I would try and let her know how you feel, how you want to be there for her and miss her. Just as I am sure she wants to say a million things to you too but probably not sure what the right thing to say is. It is hard to be married in being living so far apart, for a long period of time. I think it takes special people, such as you and your wife, to be doing what you are doing, for the sake of our freedom, our country. I give you both all of the credit, you as the soldier over in Iraq and she over here trying to handle it all. I hope you are coming home soon but I and my family thanks you for the sacrifices you and your wife are making every day, to do the job you were ordered to do. I think you'll be fine, just keep talking to each other, and be as open and honest, supportive and loving as possible. Good luck and God Bless you all!!!

Answer 3

Take it from me....Situation Doesn't Good....Doesn't Mean that GOD can't save this marriage....But when a person starts to worry or fear about ANYTHING in LIFE...these are seeds of Doubt or Lack of Trust & Faith upon that certain thing. Fear & Worrying leads to Anger, Wrath, and Evil. It's in the Bible (Check Out Psalms 37.) Devil did the same to me and took my Fam away ( got her to start looking outside our marriage for stability and comfort AND Today she has a lover, terminated from job, repoed car & evicted from apt, Yet GOD has blessed me caused I stayed faithful.)
Brother I pray that the 2 of start Praying 2gether RIGHT NOW....DON'T STOP CALLING Because you are MAD or UPSET! That's what the devil wants you to do...GET Back HOME SAFELY.... I Believe in U. GOD BLESS.

Answer 4

CALL HER!!!! She is just lonely and this is the best way she knows how to deal with it. She is probably really gonna think something now that you haven't called her. So pick up the phone and call her right now. And just try to be patient with her cause she is being patient with you while you are gone.

Answer 5

i did this to my hubby alot and he didnt like it at all...i did it because i was insecure and afraid i wasnt good enough for him..... its prolly the same for her ESPECIALLY since you are overseas...(military or not it doesnt matter) just tell her you love her EVERY NIGHT! call her just to say i love you (if you can) and if at all posible try to steer the convo to something where she cant bring up the Xs.... (maybe consider asking what she did today and talk about HER! tell her that you miss hold9ing her hand or cuddling WITH HER.....) it will keep you both sane trust me...(but for the love of god dont change the subject AFTER she brings up your Xs, youll just seem guilty of everything even if there is nothing to be guilty about)

Answer 6

Shes probably just freaking out with u gone, and so far away she's probably worried that you could basically do anything and she'd never know about it. Although its very hard for you to be in Iraq, its just about as hard for the families you leave behind to deal with it..try to be patient with her, and realize she's hurting and perhaps just isnt expressing it well to you.. It will be ok.. she's just not dealing well with you being gone is all..

Btw, thanks for all your doing in Iraq :)
Good luck, and be safe..

Answer 7

First off, May God bless you while you are overseas and may he make sure that you are returned to your family.
I am sure that your Wife misses you tremendously and wants you home. I am guessing that she is pretty stressed out and instead of telling you about her stresses she instead talks about your Exs. Next time you talk to her remind her that you married her, not the Exs, and that she is who you are in love with. You just need to constantly reassure her that she is the only one you love.
God Bless you and all of the troops that are defending our country.

Answer 8

Accept that you can not do anything at all while you are there. Maybe you need to worry more about surviving and not worry about the wife until you get back.

Answer 9

Maybe ask her to keep the conversation positive considering the situation you're in.

Also, God bless you for the work you're doing there.

Answer 10

tell her straightout that its pissing you off and she's the only one for you. but plan first, i don't think its wise to say "the only one for me right now" because its easy to be misinterpreted. say things that you think she likes to hear. be a romantic, even when its just on the phone.

you need trust for a healthy relationship.