do you like this poem, i made it myself.
invisible:
im sinking farther into a world i dont want to know, my conscience pulls me back and tells me to let it go. my head is hurting , my own heart decieves me.everyone lokks at me like im invisible.sitting in the grass smelling the flowers , i could do this for hours upon hours.i cant help but feel invisible.invisiblity comes frm a deep hurting inside.walking around the big shaded tree i cant help but feel im free.remembering how i had to lie thinking only of the gloomy blue sky.growing up in a world of hope , learning after how to cope.putting my head into my hands and crying out all my tears ...... beacuse i was invisible.
well what do you think??
2006-07-08 16:19:44 · 13 answers · asked by Soccer rox! 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
im sorry to confuse anyone but this was one of my older poems, just wondering what people thought of it. i have a bf and friends im not invisible anymore but i thought i did a prety god job on it. thanks for commenting .
2006-07-08 16:30:52 · update #1
I liked it, It really made me think and you have a fabulous talent for writing. I could never write like you or rhyme like you can. I think all of the poems you've written are wonderfully good and I enjoy reading them, keep up the great work.
2006-07-09 06:08:45 · answer #1 · answered by Asterisk_Love♥ 4 · 5⤊ 1⤋
You do a good job of putting your feelings into words. If a poem is supposed to make you think and feel, then you succeeded because I think you need someone to help you and your poem made me feel sad.I say this because by the sound of your poem, it looks as if you feel that you have been deceived and for that I am sorry
2006-07-08 23:37:39 · answer #2 · answered by Sunshine 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, nice poem. All poems from the heart are nice to read.
Second, please use proper spelling and grammer, not doing so looks bad.
Third, if this is how you really feel, you need to get a friend and start doing fun things together.
Good Luck! :)
2006-07-08 23:24:19 · answer #3 · answered by Rob C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As someone who's a cultural imbecile...I'll be honest...it has to be beautiful 'cause I can't make heads or tails of it.
Good job...
2006-07-08 23:24:24 · answer #4 · answered by 4999_Basque 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like your hurting from something and crying out for help thinking no one cares when they do.
2006-07-08 23:23:52 · answer #5 · answered by hollywood71@verizon.net 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's beautiful, but I wonder what made you so sad to write this.
2006-07-08 23:23:26 · answer #6 · answered by chieko 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. i loved it
2. get a guy that could comfort u, for gods sake
2006-07-08 23:26:04 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did good. Better then I could have done
2006-07-08 23:36:32 · answer #8 · answered by ▒Яenée▒ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i like it but it seems your very sad and a lone
2006-07-08 23:24:35 · answer #9 · answered by wil_t52 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yea iguess it k,it deep
2006-07-08 23:24:33 · answer #10 · answered by cutedimas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋