I'm so embarrassed, ashamed, and humiliated. I introduced him to my sister. I used to date his best friend. I love my sister and I love him too. What should I do and how do I tell her. He already knows and wants to keep the baby; this will be his first child. My sister has two children from a previous relationship.
2006-07-08 15:25:32 · 26 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
First and MOST important you have to figure out what you want, and if you want to keep the baby. If you do, you have no choice but to be honest with your sister. Be prepared, though. A man who would do this and not tell his wife the truth could easily turn on you. Don't count on HIM to make things okay, or to leave her (if she'll keep him) and do the right thing by you. He didn't do the right thing by her.
You have to think of the baby first, yourself second, and THEN him.
If there's someone else you can talk to (another family member you trust, a friend, a pastor) you really, really should.
I hope everything turns out okay for you, I really do. Don't dwell on shame or humiliation - it won't help anything. A very smart woman once told me that shame and humiliation are two of the worst words in the English language and the biggest waste of energy ever. It's true. Forgive yourself completely and then think about what you want for your life and your family. Give your sister all the time and space she needs and accept that the two of you will have a tough time for a while, but you're sisters and twins so have some faith that eventually things may get better.
But again, don't go through this alone. Talk to a friend, minister, psychologist, someone that can help and support you. Take care of yourself.
2006-07-08 15:34:30 · answer #1 · answered by Ask_Ivy 2 · 24⤊ 8⤋
I know twins are close, but u have taken it too far.
WOW!!! U Say ur embarrassed, ahsamed and humilated? U wasn't feeling this way when u were sleep with him, now ur both caught.
How should u tell her, ( why don't u wait and let the baby tel her) U say u love your sister( yeah right, thats why ur having a baby by her husband) he's a dog both of u should feel bad for doing this to ur sister, it already hurts to now ur man is sleeping around, but when it's with family and a baby is in the picture, well that just messes it up all the more.
I think u did this on propose, if u didn't want to hurt her u never would have slept with her husband.
So no reason to claim ur embarrassed, ashame or humilated, YOUR CAUGHT
2006-07-08 22:35:01 · answer #2 · answered by itspink22@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you have to face the fiddler. You created this mess by getting involved, and now you have a baby. Don't make the baby pay for your mistake to egin with. The best option here is for you to give the baby up for adoption, or keep it and tell him that he needs to divorce your sister and marry you for the sake of the child. Either way you have destroyed your life with your sister, and the feelings you have should have come long before getting pregnant. Your sister and you will probably be mortal enemies, and you created the problem. There is nothing that you can do to fix this problem, and nobady here can really help you. Really you should think about giving the baby up for adoption so that the baby doesnt go through life feeling unloved and unwanted.
2006-07-08 22:39:50 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if u REALLY love him, then u and him should sit down with your sister and tell her what has happened! I know u might not want to but this HAS to be done!!! Just tell her that u and her husband r going to have a baby together and that u guys want to keep the baby. I think u guys could take it from there.
I wish u guys luck!!!!!!!!!
2006-07-08 22:50:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh man. Why did you sleep with your sister's husband in the first place. You violated the first rule among sisters and boys.
First of all you need to sit down and talk to your sister. You should be a good sister and the bigger woman and tell her. Tell her before he tells her. Second you should sit down with him and also have him explain to your sister how and why this happened. You need to be honest with her.
Don't bet yourself up about it. Just make sure that you understand that this man cheated on your sister with her and he could do the same to you. I hope everything works itself out. Good Luck!
2006-07-08 22:37:08 · answer #5 · answered by sparkling_apple 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
At this point, if you plan on keeping the baby you're going to have to tell your sister. Your situation is complicated, but your solution is simple. Remember, for every action this is an opposite equal reaction......consequences. Take ownership for your actions and move on from there. And the love of your sister should take precedence over any man.
2006-07-08 22:30:39 · answer #6 · answered by cub6ib9 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No easy way to tell her....she is going to be mad no matter which way you slice it. Girl you have just hurt the one person who is going to be with you always. Guess what your not a bad person but you made a huge mistake. It s not the end of the world. The baby is most important and so is family so be honest. Thats a start! God bless Only a fool doesn't learn from his/her mistakes.
2006-07-08 22:35:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If i was your sister i would kick your nasty butt. How dare you sleep with your sisters man. Are you that desperate you cant find your own. And how dare him you both deserve each other and a life of hell. Just feel sorry for the sister and the unborn child that the child would have such sick parents. I would disown you forever.
2006-07-08 22:32:15 · answer #8 · answered by sweeetkisses2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh boy, you are in a bit of a sticky wicket, eh? Well..... hmm. honesty is always the best, but.. I'd be very careful about how I approached my sister with it. Chances are she'll be mad, and upset, but maybe, just maybe, it'll work out in the end. If you are unsure about keeping the child, maybe you could offer to let her adopt? Sort of a surrogate situation?
2006-07-08 22:28:46 · answer #9 · answered by clikkparker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what the hell u was thinking, you need to tell her that's your sister, she need to know. and i don't think that it's a good idea to keep the baby. and she really don't need to be with her husband. cuz he ant doing thing for, but keeping things from her. talk to your sister may be yall will come up with something. after all she is your sister and hope fully she will for give you for your sin. but in the long run she needs to because blood is thicker then water.
GOOD LUCK WITH TELLING HER.
2006-07-08 23:38:25 · answer #10 · answered by tanisha a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You cannot fix this. But you have to talk with your sister. She must know. This may help to reestablish trust between you two.
( Yes she will be angry at you for a long while and at her husband) Just don't do it again.
2006-07-08 22:31:59 · answer #11 · answered by vhat40 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋