well I have this b/f who always wont to have sex and I don't have a problem with that but he also wonts me to give him oral sex and its something that I've never been into .but he alway gives me oral sex without me asking him to. do you think I'm wrong for not doing it when he ask I'll tell him no and he say that he do it to me without me asking him to do it but I tell him thats his problem because I don't ask him to.I'm I being selfish or what?
2006-07-08 13:35:33 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
No tell your boyfriend that you dont want to do it and give him freeky sex.
2006-07-08 13:51:08 · answer #1 · answered by sillypotthead 1 · 3⤊ 2⤋
It's simply a case of the two of you not being well matched sexually. No, you should not feel obligated to perform oral on him, simply because he does it to you...however, you should also be able to understand why he's frustrated that you do not do it, because it's something he'd find pleasureable and he desires it. You are under no obligation, but maybe this is a sign that you two are not suited long-term...sex can break a relationship, and if a couple isn't matched fairly well with regard to sex drive and desires (what type of sex, positions, etc they like and don't like) then it's likely to become an issue at some point, if not a deal breaker...
If you aren't willing to give him oral, then stop allowing him to give it to you...at least that way he's not left feeling that you're getting some pleasure/satisfaction sexually and he's getting none...or, perhaps if you got him off with your hand, he'd be somewhat satisfied that he was getting something (sexually) from you...
2006-07-08 13:40:45 · answer #2 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes well no because most things are do unto others as you would have them do unto you but if this person is taking it upon themselves then that is not your fault because if the only reason they are doing it is to get it in return then he doesnt deserve oral sex, but I dont know if their good at what they do u might consider just trying at least once because like they say what you dont do someone else will and well at that find out how big a part of sex it is for him or if you could substitute it for something you are comfortable with.
2006-07-08 13:40:20 · answer #3 · answered by Andy29Pandy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think u are wrong or being selfish. You should never do anything you don't want to and he can't force u to do it cuz you have the power to say yes and no. He has make a choice to give u cuz he feels comfortable doing it but not everyone likes giving oral sex.
2006-07-08 13:40:30 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are uncomfortable doing it then don't. Sex should an enjoyable thing for you.
I think he is being selfish by forcing this on you and laying guilt trips. As you say you don't ask for it - if you did and wouldn't give it back then that would be selfish, but not the way you are.
There might be a good reason for not wanting to do this. There is a theory that
cervical cancer is caused by uncircumcized members that are not cleaned properly. Maybe you subconciously don't see this man as particularly clean.
2006-07-08 13:48:48 · answer #5 · answered by AJ... Australia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are being selfish!! Maybe you would enjoy giving it to him more if you are into sex more. Giving oral should not be a chore it should be enjoyable for you and him and you thinking that way he`ll be looking before long. Sex is one thing but if you have to beg someone to do something during sex then why bother. He`ll go looking before long and then you`ll be asking why men cheat. Because you can`t satisfy him at home!!!!
2006-07-08 13:42:20 · answer #6 · answered by bren_jim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honestly, you are being a little selfish. If he does it for you, you should try and give it back to him. Just think of it this way: when he is orally satisfying you he gets no real pleasure out of it other than seeing you get pleasure. Think of it like that when you try and return the favor, he is obviously really in to you or else he wouldn't do that for you.
2006-07-08 13:38:16 · answer #7 · answered by bigsnowtoday 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not being selfish! He is the one who is being selfish by doing something that you don't want to have done. he is not honoring you or respecting you.
My husband wanted me to do that but I told him that the idea of it just grosses me out and he really respects that and he never forces me to do something I do not wish to do because he loves and respects me.
I think you better think twice about the relationship . A guy that does something against your will has no respect or any regards for you. That can lead to other problems in the future.
2006-07-08 13:40:24 · answer #8 · answered by HappyCat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, you are being selfish. At least try it once. Actually try it a few times. It takes a little getting used to. After you have done it several times, if you still hate it, stop doing it.
2006-07-08 13:39:19 · answer #9 · answered by Blunt Honesty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Only do what you are comfortable doing. Nobody should feel obligated or pressured into doing something they do not enjoy. Tell him that you do not enjoy it and tell him why if you have a reason. If he cannot live with that fact.. then let him go. Life is too short to be miserable.
2006-07-08 13:38:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are in a relationship where you want different things. Even though you arn't asking him, hes going the extramile for you. It would be a way to show your love to give him what he wants because both partners should be willing to make each other happy.
2006-07-08 13:38:49 · answer #11 · answered by dream109893 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋