I'm nice, hard worker; never been the outsider with co-workers until now. What can I do to change it?

Question

I've worked in this office longer than any of the others. I've trained some of them. I'm not a supervisor. But the new supervisor did hire her "friends". We all get along, no fighting. But I'm kept out of "the loops". They talk and laugh and share personal life stuff and do not include me. They don't have to, it's work not home life. But one got married, they were all invited except me. She brought in pictures and the sat around and shared them, except me. I've worked for the same company for 26 years, never experienced this before. Honestly, I'm not weird, I'm easy to get along with, help whenever I can, but this is awful. Should I quit and just get another position? 26 years down the drain. Why? Do you think, they want to hire another "friend"? What do you think? Others have noticed too, its not just me.

Answer 1

It does feel odd to be the outsider in a place that you have already established your presence so long ago.

The new people are friends outside the office, they share things at the office because of their long time relationship with each other, on this account, you are the aquaintence. Maybe there were issues with the wedding, only alloted x amount of guest, maybe she thought you would not want to be invited and did not want to make an issue about it with you.

How's the work situation for you really? Is work load the same? Is it different in a good way? In a bad way? On an interpersonal level do they treat you respectably as any co-worker should be treated on the job?

Did you have a chance to give the bride a card or a small gift? You still have time to do so. Have you tried to jump in on thier conversations like, oh! you went to Park Place! I've always wanted to visit there, was it difficult to travel there, what did you like best about it... or how was your son's baseball game? Just friendly stuff that one would do to make friends... that is if you want these people as friends and to be friendly. Maybe they just need to know you are interested in them.

Other than that, I am not so keen on quiting unless you have something super terif to go on too. One thing I did learn recently about being on the job, that no one is expendable no matter how senior a position one has or how good an employee you are. Can you transfer to another dept?

Answer 2

Don't quit unless you end up in tears -- in that case, it's not worth the trauma. But if you can stick it out for a while, do so. If others notice the problem, then your supervisor's boss knows about it. If your supervisor cannot create a comfortable workplace for other employees -- and you are an "other employee" -- then she won't be there all that long. When she goes, so will her cohorts. In the meantime, do your job as well if not better than you always have. Other employees rely on your expertise and experience with the firm. They know that. You will probably end up with more and stronger friendships among the rest of them and your supervisor and her friends will be the ones on the outside. Hang in, woman. You deserve to keep your job AND be happy.

Answer 3

there's a reason they use the terminology of co-worker as "operating spouse" many time you spend extra time with reported co-worker than you do along with your relatives. when you're doing reliable at homestead on your own courting it gained't be a issue. If issues at homestead suck, you've a tendency to open as a lot as a close co worker, and then from there issues from time to time merely take position. It sucks although that is what that is. yet like I reported when you're all reliable at homestead i does not difficulty about it. even as someone steps outdoors their courting they comprehend finished properly what they are doing. there is not any excuse to have an affair both at artwork or outdoors of labor. in case you want to have an affair, you should get first, the man being cheated on continually exhibits out and that is an really sh*ty feeling.

Answer 4

I am the new person in the office. I always hav e a hard time fitting in. I find that having lunch together or find a common interest helps. What do you guys have in common? You work for the same company. Go to lunch together or have a BBQ at your house and invite them over.