There are 4 of us me, my husband, and another couple which are our best friends. The male friend has a bad habit talking dirty and trying to get us all for together sexually when he is drinking, knowing that it would never happen. I just over look what he says and blame it on the alcohol, Now my husband usually just kids about it. But one night while he was drinking calls our female friend and is talking dirty to her, She hung up on him. I found out about this and freaked. He says he didn't mean anything by it he was drunk, and blames it on the fact of the conversation that goes on when we are all together. But we weren't all together he did it alone. The other couple was upset as well and they talked about it and are ok they also feel like he does that it was a result of our past conversation. But it is hard for me to get past what he did. What should I do?
2006-07-08 02:30:30 · 15 answers · asked by Tina D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
lose him now
2006-07-08 02:32:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In this situation I would first realize that a close nit "foursome" with open sexual conversation could lead the men to wonder, fantasize and even ask for a little orgy action. Of course, this doesn't mean that it should happen, or that the men have the right to expect it. But boys are boys and they do like to imagine the possibilities. I would just remember that he was intoxicated, and just because you're married doesn't mean you don't "think" about having relations with other people. You should make a date and talk to him about it. Explain to him that it is not acceptable and that it makes you and the other wife uncomfortable. I'm sure once you bring it to light he will try to keep it platonic and the conversation light, I would also have a group discussion about it so that everyone is on the same page. If y'all are best friends you should be able to just deal with it and move on from it. Also, knowing that you are all friends, you should be secure in your marriage enough and your friendship to not be threatened by his intoxicated gabbing.
2006-07-08 10:04:07 · answer #2 · answered by redtoolips 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well drunk or not, he is giving you an insight into what he thinks deep down.. he would like it to happen as well.. you need to make a decision. He could use some help with this before it goes to far.. all it takes is the four of you drinking and something will happen.
2006-07-08 09:36:43 · answer #3 · answered by needingitnow342000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is very disrespectful to anyone whether man or woman to be spoken to in that manner. Both your hubby and her hubby need to know that.
Your hubby probably feels that since her hubby can talk to you like that then he can talk to her like that.
Even though it was not your fault that man spoke to you that way, a drunk can reason it to be so.
Since he was drunk it should be easier to forgive him. Make sure he is well aware that it can not happen again.
You may also explain to him how much you despise that man speaking to you perversely. He should have a talk with him as well.
2006-07-08 09:41:38 · answer #4 · answered by lovingfeathers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seeing as this is a difficult situation, it's one that you need to get out of quick. This is the fast track to ruining any relationship so you and your husband need to talk about why he is so curious to swing (as what this situation is referred to)? I would seek couples counciling to help you all through this. Also I wouldn't speak to that other couple until they work through their issues as well.
2006-07-08 09:36:41 · answer #5 · answered by Resident_Psychic_24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweetie what i would do is try to lay low on drinking ok b/c somtimes if ur husband is out side our in his room and ur friend goes in there and cheaks on him he could do so bad stuff so lay low ok and to for get what he said i know it is bad but it is over with have a great day
2006-07-08 09:35:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Big deal. Get over it. Have a foursome!! Geez. Live life before it's over and stop having all of these issues. Word to the Mother.
2006-07-08 09:34:41 · answer #7 · answered by misterpoopoomouth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) Lose the "best friends".
2) Seek counseling for your "confused" husband.
3) Pray to God that you keep your sanity!!!
This is NOT a good scenario, and you need to act on it immediately!!!
I hope this helps,,,,
Lonnie
2006-07-08 09:37:01 · answer #8 · answered by lonnie_m_d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him instead of talkin to us. Say evrything you wrote right now and just have a little heart to heart
2006-07-08 09:36:27 · answer #9 · answered by G 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you ever noticed .... That when you are drinking the truth tends to come out!!
... and the lies start when you start to sober up!!
2006-07-08 09:41:35 · answer #10 · answered by BlackWidow 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He did mean it...and he's hoping it will happen. Get some new friends.
2006-07-08 09:36:01 · answer #11 · answered by ernie3232 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋