Are there any happily married couples out there?

Question

What are the secrets to achieve this?
this question is for those married for more than 7-10 years

If you browse through the questions in this section, 80% are about unhappy marriages. Maybe marriage is not the thing that fits to human beings?

Answer 1

Happiness is relative isn't it. I have known my husband for 23 years. He is my best friend. We talk about everything - we like to relate a good relationship to restaurant chatter. What I mean is the next time you go into a restaurant watch the couples dinning there - most of them do not even talk to one another - they eat, they leave. To have a good relationship you have to be friends and communicate. If you loose those work at getting them back. My parents have been married for 35 years - they don't talk to one another - they are 2 separate people going their own ways and staying together because they know nothing else. In my experience communication is the key to happiness.

Answer 2

I have only been married three years so I am not the person you are looking for to answer your question. However, my parents are still happily married and have been together for close to 40 years. My in-law's are also still happily married and have been together for thrity something years. My husband's grandparents have been happily married for well over 60 years. My sister has been happily married for almost 15 years.

I think communication is the most important thing in a marriage. I also think part of the problem with all of these unhappy marriages is that people rush into it too quickly. My husband and I talked about marriage long before we were engaged. We talked about how we both felt about divorce, too. We knew what we were getting into when we got married. We both agreed that divorce was not an option because neither of us believe in it. Til death do us part means exactly that.

Marriage isn't something to enter into lightly and I think too many people do that these days. They jump in without really knowing the other person and then decide to end it when it turns out to not be what they were expecting. That, in my opinion, is why there are so many unhappy couples.

Answer 3

You asked for those married 7-10 years? Well pooh! Ive been happily married 20 1/2 years. I guess my opinion would fall on deaf ears then.

You have to be willing to accept that there will be ebbs and flows in marriage. There will be times you cannot put yourself first etc.

1) set boundaries immediately with immediate family and keep those boundaries!
2) make an agreement that no matter what..the two of you will be a team! You may disagree at times with your teammate..but it will take both of you to make a good marriage so you'd might as well agree from the beginning that youw ill look at it as a team effort! What one does..the other will reap the rewards or consequences for!
3)make time to laugh together and count your blessings as a couple.
4)be honest with one another without fear of reprocussions.
5) make plans on what you will do in your old age together and talk about it often! It will become a common goal and make you more unified.
6) Pray together!

Best wishes!

Happily married to my high school sweetheart 20 + years. Mother of 5 (all my husbands! ;-))

Answer 4

Married 21 years, happily, and not so happily. A marriage that lasts is one that can get through those not so happy times. Communication is a big part of it, and patients. Trust is very big, if your insecure about your spouse it will never last. I am pretty sure she has had a fling or two and I haven't gotten all worked up about it, people aren't perfect. Take the good with the bad, grow but not apart, and share feelings. Don't get all hung up on possessing your spouse, that will destroy a relationship pretty quickly, let them enjoy life, and enjoy it yourself. Don't expect the happily ever after thing, that only happens in fairy tales, and movies, and that's because ever after is then end, not the beginning. Also take time every so often to seduce your spouse to let them know that you desire them, and want them. 21 years is a long time, but it seems like a short time when you've been through it. I know our way is not for everyone but it worked for us.

Answer 5

I would say my I am half of a happily married couple.

I would think some of the things along the way that have kept us happy would be trust, flexablity, understanding, patience, respect, appreciation, growth, and love.

All marriages go through trials and can be disappointing or discouraging, but they just make you appreciate the good times more.

I have experienced several different phases in my marriage where we worked together, worked seperate shifts opposite one another, and currently, I am home more while business takes him away much more than I would like. And that's not very happy, but necessary for now, so patience, understanding and flexability have moved me through each of these elements that have been hard at times to feel encouraged. And when I do have him close, we make up for time missed, even if that is sitting on the couch watching a movie and falling asleep together, it is well appreciated.

I respect my husband and trust him with my life, I don't believe in pettiness, holding grudges against him, or blaming him for the way things turn out, life is not guaranteed a certain outcome for anyone, to hold my husband accountable for my happiness wouldn't be fair. I think very highly of him, and I have never called him curse words because of the respect I have for him. I trust him to treat me likewise, and he always has. We appreciate our lives together and we don't disrespect our marriage in any form.

I trust my husband in all aspects, even when we are learning something new, and are uncertain of how to work through it, we believe in each others strength that if we get stressed, worried, or scared about whatever situation, we can lean on each other to be stronger.and even if the outcome isn't fun, we can go back to the drawing board together and say.. hmmm.. how do we go about this differently?

We believe in learning more about the world, and where we are in it, and how we can make it better, for our benefit personally, but for the bigger pictures in life too. And the more we learn the more we grow. Even if the interest aren't the same, I can appreciate the importance in what he cares about, and he can support me in my thoughts and wants as well. I actually think couple who persue different interest are quite lucky to have a trusted advisor in those areas to keep them informed.

I don't know what makes a marriage happy, but I know I love to be around him, I feel like a better person standing beside him, and I think that shows through to others that I am happy.

Answer 6

Yes there are happily married couples out here. I have been married 40 years and wouldn't change a thing. It's just like having a job, you must work at it. There are times when you have to do more giving than taking, but that;s alright because other times it goes the other way. There must be trust, compassion caring , humor, and an all over caring and love.

Answer 7

I've been married 7.5 years and we are happily married. The key is communication, compromise and hard work. It isn't easy maintaining a relationship. And I'm not saying we haven't had our rough spots. We've had plenty of 'discussions', as my hubby likes to call them. But we made a commitment to each other that we both intend to keep. We didn't go into our marriage with the mindset of if it doesn't work out we will just divorce. We had the mindset of until death do us part, means until death do us part (without murder).

Answer 8

Yes, go with the flow. Don't get uptight with one another. Always look for the things that you enjoy together, and avoid looking for the things to fight about.

This is a two way street though. If you are l;ooking for the good things in a relationship and your partner is always looking for a fight, it will never work out.

Answer 9

So your saying that marriages start to fall apart after 7 yrs?

Answer 10

yes there are happily married people

it takes time and the willingness to let your partner find their own way. no one controlling the other. no demands, lots of respect, lots of talking and learning what makes the other person tick.

no marriage is perfect, they all have flaws.