Why is it that I cant have an orgasm?Or it takes 1-2 hours?

Question

When Im having sex with my man either I cant have an orgasm or it ends up taking so long that he can finish two or three times before me.(And trust me it takes him forever!) How can I speed up the process...If you know what I mean?

He always "warms me up" b4 we do anything and it feels great while its happening, but when the time comes i just cant seems to let my mind go. Have any suggestions to help me separate body and mind?

Answer 1

You may have some kind of mental issues concerning sex. You may need counseling. Stop trying so hard and let it happen naturally.

Answer 2

Maybe buy some toys and have him get you all 'warmed up' before you even start the real stuff. It might be partly in your mind too. If you have convinced yourself that it takes you ages to come then it probably will. Try some meditation perhaps to get you relaxed. They say a woman's most erogenous zone is her brain so get your mind there and the body should follow. Best of luck!

Answer 3

There is a wide variety of response in women regarding sexual orgasm.

You may not like, or believe my answer, but the best thing that you can do is practice.

On your own, without your boyfriend, touch yourself and learn what works best for you. Light stroking, or sometimes the use of a little lubricant, or a vibrator can help. Every time you practice like this, and bring yourself to orgasm, it gets easier to do that again later. Practice will help.

Once you know what works for you, teach your Boyfriend what to do to please you. In a normal sexual encounter, the first 30 to 45 minutes should be doing what is often called foreplay. Probably something like you and he kissing, touching and stroking one another. In particular, he should focus on exciting and pleasing you during this time, and his pleasure should be secondary.

There are a number of women who can not, or have a very hard time in having an orgasm only through intercourse. You may be one of those women, and that is okay. Practicing touching yourelf (masterbating) may help that in the long run, or it may make orgasm during intercourse easier, or may not have any direct help.

You don't need to have an orgasm during intercourse, it is not of primary importance. As long as you and your boyfriend can get satisfaction and the opportunity to be close, that is the goal, and not orgasm. But, of course, both of you enjoy orgasm, and you can seek that out, but it does not have to be during intercourse.

Many men are concerned about their partners sexual pleasure. They will work during foreplay to get their partner excited, by kissing, touching and stroking her. Many men will perform oral sex on the woman, until she has an orgasm, and then after holding her for enough time after, then have intercourse with her.

Other men can, and do go thorugh intercourse, have orgasm, and then bring their partner to orgasm, through rubbing with their hand, or oral sex after they have an orgasm. Some men lose interest after they have an orgasm, which is why most men focus on giving their partner an orgasm first.

If you have a partner who is more concerned about their own orgasm than in pleasing you, then you either need to teach them to be different, or find a better lover. As I said, most men are more concerned about your pleasure than their own. It does sound like your boyfriend is interested in pleasing you though.

You might experiment with a session where you both start with the expectation that neither of you is focused on having an orgasm, but you are both just going to explore on anothers bodies. Take a shower together to start. After you have practiced, show him all of your intimate parts, and let him show you all of his. Show him what parts are most sensitive (labia and clitoris), and how to touch your nipples and breasts in the way that you like. Practice oral sex on each other, and don't be afraid to give him feedback by moaning when he does the right things so he knows what to try again.

I hope this helps. Feel free to let me know if it works for you, or if you want any further advice.

Answer 4

Dear lady! I say you next: buy a book "The Multi-Orgasmic Woman: Discover Your Full desaire, Pleasure, and Vitality(Hardcover)" by Mantak Chia, Carlton Abrams. $28.00, USA
Buy this book in Yahho on web-site: Amazon.com, search:Books.
And look here same books:"Healing Love thrugh the Tao: Cultivate Femal Sexuale Energy" by Mantac Chia and others, too.
And next, I'm thining that your friend must remember about your orgasmic pleasure, too.
With my regards,
Dr.: Valery Shaposhnikov, Ph.D., Moscow, Russia.

Answer 5

You may not be getting enough blood to the vaginal area resulting in a lack of stimulation. Try some L-Arginine creams for the vagina and penis. These products increase blood flow and result in more stimulation to the genitals. It can be placed on the penis prior to insertion or directly on the vagina as additional lubricant. Do the research , it could help.

Answer 6

Try oral and a focus on the clit.
Try more romance first.
I think that you need more foreplay.
It might take 30 minutes but this is way too long.

Answer 7

it's like this most will say stimlation but i say it's you. you need to relax and enjoy it most women don't know how to orgasm, I always tell my ladies to relax and get into it, because most women are stiff when it comes to sex. and this is my motto "i'm as only as good as my partner"

Answer 8

Could be that you need to give yourself more time getting ready before you begin the dance?

Answer 9

try to hav more romance before any play its help u out

Answer 10

Try using some toys, dildos, vibrators, etc.