I am married with 2 kids. There is a girl who really is making me loose my mind. I really like her and care for her. I am not sure if I am corresponded, but I think I would reach her if I try. My wife is a good woman. We have some problems, but nothing big. But it is a fact that I am not as excited with my marriage as I am supposed to be. I am trying hard to do the right thing, but everytime I "decide" to do so, she comes back to my thoughts. I really like this girl, and she is also a great woman. Any thougts?
2006-07-08 00:43:26 · 23 answers · asked by d58 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I am married with two kids. If my husband ever decided to even graze on the grass on the other side I would be totally devestated. If he did that, and I did forgive him and take him back, I would then live each day in fear from "when he will do it again?" He would lose my trust, and it would take a whole helluva lot of work to earn it back, if he earns it back at all. What kind of life would that be?
A marriage is sacred between two people. Exclusively! That is what makes it so special. As others have said, it isn't always a walk in the park. Any truly loving relationship takes work. That is the problem these days. Hardly anyone wants to "work" at anything anymore. At the first sign of trouble one partner starts to gravitate outside the marriage to fill the voids, and feels justified in doing so because their partner is lacking. How would your partner even know you feel these voids if you cannot honestly talk about them, and try to fill them together?
Also, as others have said, a good woman and marriage is hard to find these days. Be thankful for what you have in your life. If you are truly to the point that you are seriously considering an affair, I think you need to do some deep soul-searching. What are your needs that are not getting met?
With this don't just look at what your wife is not giving you, either. You have to look at yourself, also, and figure out what it is that you are not happy about. Maybe you are not satisfied with your job. Maybe it is that you have gained some weight, and do not feel as attractive?
Identify what is lacking in your life right now and confront it. Find a solution to fill those needs within your marriage, and within yourself. This can only be done through open and honest communication with yourself, and with your wife. If your marriage is as good as you say it is you should not be afraid to talk to her about what you need. A good loving partner will do what they can to help you fill them.
2006-07-08 04:13:59 · answer #1 · answered by Lisa T 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Why is it that people are willing to try the greener grass over the fence. You have alot to think about.
Think about the KIDS !!!!!!!!!!!!!! What do you think this is going to do to them? You said you have a good marriage. So what is the problem? Why do people want to give up on something that is good? You need to spice up your marriage. I am sure your wife drove you crazy at one time too. Find that and play with it. Bring her flowers buy her a sexy piece of lingerie. Tell her how beautiful she is. When you start to give her compliments she will start to feel sexy and take it from there. Please don't give up on you family for something that makes you loose your mind. Sure she may be a good person now but when you move in with someone things change and are you willing to take the chance? Please think about this. I hope you take the time that you use thinking about this girl and put it into your marriage.
2006-07-08 01:16:49 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why did you marry your wife? Wouldnt you hate taking the chance with this girl then it didnt work out think about the kids what will you tell them? that you left their mother for a "better offer"and when that gets boring you might find someone else that pays you more attention no wonder the divorce rate is getting so high .If you wanted a life like that why did you waste your wifes time and bother having kids in the first place you are being a selfish prick who deserves to be alone for the rest of your life
Ijust hope your wife relises before you break her heart and she blaming herself for years to come!
2006-07-08 00:56:49 · answer #3 · answered by funny_mummy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To 'conquer a girl', what are you a viking?
You should work on your marriage. Marriage isn't a walk in the park. It is an adventuresome journey through life. It's like climbing and mountain one day and smelling flowers the next...meaning some days it is really hard and others it is real easy. You need to communicate, compromise and work on keeping your marriage working...not looking around at girls to conquer.
2006-07-08 02:06:46 · answer #4 · answered by PATTY H 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go for the girl. Your wife doesn't have to know. I have had at least 6 lovers in my two years of marriage. I love my wife dearly, and I would never leave her, but I cannot resist a beautiful woman. It's gotten to where I don't even try to resist anymore.
2006-07-08 00:51:14 · answer #5 · answered by I know!! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of people don't know what a good wife and family they have until they've lost it. Don't find out the hard way. Work out your problems with your wife and get the romance back in your marriage. You're suffering from a bad case of penis envy.
2006-07-08 00:48:35 · answer #6 · answered by Ya-sai 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well you asked for advice well let me tell you pal my husband and i have been married for 11 years 5 years ago he left our home and brobe my heart and our daughters because he thought the grass was greener on the other side he found out after 3 months the woman changed she was a closet case drunk and after she won her challenge of getting to leave home 3 months later after that new love faded she dumped him for someone else it caused our family so much pain not to mention your family if you have any mom etc.rent a video it will be cheeper in the long run. DONT DO IT. see if you still have these feelings after 6 months i doubt it.think with your head upstairs not downstairs.
2006-07-08 01:09:22 · answer #7 · answered by nicole l 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try as hard to work on your marriage as you are trying to get the other woman. Put as much thought into it and you will do the right thing..
2006-07-08 01:57:55 · answer #8 · answered by doglady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess during a married life there are always situations when other women/men move you. I say it is OK to like other people, but you should limit yourself there.
Considering your situation and commitments (marriage, wife, kids) you have to be responsible and act as such, especially if you still love your wife and have no serious issues with her.
2006-07-08 00:54:29 · answer #9 · answered by Amantia A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay with a good thing, you screw that up who knows what you'll get. A good woman is hard to find, and throwing it away would be a huge mistake. Be grateful, and put excitement back into your marriage. It's OK to think, fantasize, and dream, but don't be stupid.
2006-07-08 00:54:11 · answer #10 · answered by Jim C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋