HE SAYS HE LOVES ME AND I BELIEVE HIM BECAUSE HE BE DOING THINGS NO OTHER GUY HAS DONE FOR ME AND MY SON. HE IS SWEET ADN CUTE AND NICE TO ME. HE IS NOT WITH ME BECAUSE OF THE SEX HE SAYS I UNDERSTAND HIS PROBLEMS I DONT FIGHT TO HIM OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT. WE COULD SPEND LIKE A WHOLE DAY AND IT DOESNT HAVE TO END UP IN BED. WE JUS WATCH TV OR TALK, WE BE TALKING 24/7 ON THE PHONE I DUNNO WAT TO DO. SOME ONE HELP
2006-07-07 18:02:05 · 16 answers · asked by susyandhensy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Hey hey hey!! Maybe everybody should just calm down with the insults here. Especially the karma shouty person. Sure, he's married, and she may not be taking the wife's feelings into consideration, but when in love have any of us not done anything 'stupid' or 'inconsiderate'? Look, the point is the girl is in love and that's all she's thinking about. She didn't ask us to bombard her with advice about whether or not her relationship is ethical, she asked if we think it's a good idea if she has a child with him. So here is my advice:
He may only be married to his wife for 2 years, but they've together longer than that. Probably longer than you have. If you go ahead and have a child with him, he won't be there for the child as much as he should, b/c he's busy keeping the facade of being a loyal husband. That's if he decides to accept this in the end. And you know that unless he abandons you and the child, the wife WILL find out. They always end up knowing one way or the other. And if she doesn't throw him out, she'll make him choose. Chances are, he might go with her b/c of the history they have. But you never know. Personally I don't think it would be fair to the child, but if you two think you can hide this well enough then go right ahead. It may be inconsiderate of the wife's feelings and disrespectful, but she's the one who married a "lying, cheating sack of sh!t", and she can divorce him if she doesn't like it and deal with her poor judgment in character. Just be careful, make sure you can take care of a baby before you try.
Good luck
P.S. Forgot the most important question....If he leaves you, will you still love the baby?
2006-07-07 18:26:56 · answer #1 · answered by toddler_gobbler 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
If he loves "You" why is he still with his wife. Apparently he doesn't know what love is because true love is respecting someone enough to not make them "the other woman" but the only woman. He is not your husband and playing house with him is absurd and not in the least a responsible action. It doesn't matter if it is 2yrs. or 2 min. he made a vow to another woman for forever. If he is unhappy enough to cheat on her he should be man enough to end it with her. The worst part is that you know and you condone his actions. IF he ever left his wife for you then you will know he cheated on his other wife so why not you? He doesn't have a very good moral character and I couldn't imagine raising a child with someone who would teach them such things. It's embarrassing and I wouldn't even be able to look at myself in the mirror as a home wrecker (and that is what you are if you know he is married and pursue a relationship with him even if he is the aggressor.) I hope for your sake he has no children with his wife because that is beyond low. And what if he doesn't leave his wife? Does he have a relationship with his family? Would you ever be able to introduce them to their grandchildren? There are so many things you don't think of other than the obvious. You will always be the other women and people will hate you and be justified to do so. The idea of bringing a child into such a situation (or even pulling the one you have into it) is just stupid! It's the truth and you probably don’t want to hear it because people will only hear what they want to validate what they are doing.
Oh and have you ever seen that movies where the man has children with the poor unsuspected women just to take them and sell them on the black market or even has children with the women who are just messes so he and his wife can have their own family because his wife can't. The unknown huh? God never blesses relationships like this and karma is a real pain in the... Good luck you will need it!
2006-07-07 18:36:58 · answer #2 · answered by mistress_lilas 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Can you say RED FLAGS? DUH!!?? THIS GUY IS TAKEN. He has made a commitment to his wife. Why in the hell are you with a married man anyway? You are being a marriage wrecker. If he were divorced, that would be different. But he didn't even leave his wife before starting something with you!! What does that tell you? It tells me that he is dishonest, disrespectful, can't keep a commitment, etc. What would happen if you two had a kid together? He would end up abandoning the kid. As soon as his wfie found out that he was having an affair, that you two were having or have had a kid together, she would be smart to leave. Then he would probably abandon you as he has his freedom. Then where would you be? A single parent of 2 kids, no child support from him, etc. He is using you to get his thrills. Ahd he is saying that stuff to yiu and treating you that way because he knows that you will believe him, and that he is only using you. He WANTS you to believe his lies so you won't leave him and have him be alone with his wife. SHE is the victim in all of this. And, what if he did happen to stick around you after his wife left? He would have you and your kids to deal with. He would get bored with you and the kids, then cheat on you.
Grow up, smarten up, get a brain and a life, and GET YOUR OWN MAN THAT IS NOT MARRIED.
2006-07-07 18:16:36 · answer #3 · answered by honey 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uuuuuuummmmmmmmmmmm... there are so many things wrong with this statement, i don't know where to begin! boyfriend/married to someone else... that should be your first red flag... if he left her for you, he WILL leave you for someone else. says he loves you...he tells his wife that too...but then turns around and tells you too, so he's lying to somebody. uh, he's "sweet and cute and nice" so are puppies. only they're much easier to clean up after than husbands... and second children... (i know, i have both a husband and two children.) doing things no other guy has done for you... call a handy man/plumber/chimney sweep heck, the guys at lowes will install the hardwood flooring if you buy it there. says you understand his problems... does he need a shrink? spends the whole day together and just watches tv or talks....talking 24/7... he's not really a man, he's a robot dressed to look like a man. my husband never talks to me that much... not in the almost 10 years we've been together. and if he did, i think i would have to slap him. i love him, but i need my space.
it sounds to me like he has problems with is other relationship and needs professional counseling. you're just providing an escape. as soon as these problems are resolved, you're going to be out the window. think about what's best for your little boy... he should be the only man in your life right now.
2006-07-07 18:28:33 · answer #4 · answered by ditzi_k 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I definitely would not have a baby with this man. There is an old saying "if a spouse cheats on their partner. They will cheat on you as well" One more question you might ask yourself is why doesn't he leave his wife if he loves you? It doesn't matter how long he has been married. It is still wrong to be in a relationship with a married person. Please think long and hard before you bring another child into this world with a man that cheats on his wife.I had a cheating husband for twenty years. I divorced him. Good Luck!
2006-07-07 19:05:12 · answer #5 · answered by lfahrne 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey you are in way to deep.You say he's only been with wifey
for 2 years, but you didn't say anything about him trying to get away from her. I'm not saying that he doesn't care for you,he may feel alot for you,but if he doesn't have a real reason to leave his wife he probably won't. Even if he intends on leaving her at some time in the future everyday he stays with her makes it harderfor him to leave.
2006-07-07 18:42:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Frist of all Do u have any respect at all. U are f***king with a married guy. If he loves u so much why hasnt he left his wife then huh? Let him go find someone better U don't need to lower urself that low well i guess u already did for f***king with a married guy
2006-07-07 18:13:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
treat yourself nice, find a boyfriend that do not have a wife, if you want people to love you, you must love yourself first, beside, do you want a women out there to have a baby with your husband? you are young and beautiful, and have lots of changes out there, why not give yourself a change? there are plenty of fish in the ocean, there will be more than enough out there for you, don't go for married man. Good luck. God love you.
2006-07-07 18:13:29 · answer #8 · answered by shirley t 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if this guy is married then you need to move on. he is not somebody you need to be with. just think if he gets divorced and you 2 get married, more than likely hes going to do the same thing to you. plus think about his wife what did she do to you. find a guy who isnt married and has all those qualities that you look for in a man. i know its hard but i dont think it is a good idea
2006-07-07 18:10:26 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of you may desire to easily be there for her to cry with. i'm uncertain what you may desire to declare to her. i've got been cheated on till now by employing my husband and it hurts like loopy. i wished to go away yet wished to stay on the same time. it quite is a loopy difficulty referred to as love!!! Or codependency, one or the different! LOL i know that's no longer humorous. yet I did discover out that i'm codependent. in the journey that your buddy is going to church or has a faith, possibly she might desire to pass there for help and/or counseling. i assume all you're able to do on your buddy is purely be there for her. permit her know which you are going to be her buddy if she makes a decision to stay or go away. help her with the little one and allow her know which you are going to be there for her. (in the journey that your making plans on it, looks such as you're) whilst i grew to become into dealing with some stuff with my husband, the appropriate buddy i assumed I had, on no account referred to as and fairly talked whilst i mandatory to. It grew to become into terrible that she did no longer want to get blended up in my mess. yet genuine acquaintances GET blended UP IN each OTHERS MESSES! (whilst she desires the help and did no longer create the mess herself) you're gonna be the good individual in her life that she relies upon upon, whether he's not. desire I had a chum such as you who quite cares!
2016-12-10 06:19:06 · answer #10 · answered by erke 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋