That their man cheated and if they do it again they are out of there. Who are they fooling? If they weren't strong enough the first time what makes them think they will be the 2nd time? Why do women lie to themselves when forgiving the 1st time gives the guy the green light to do it again?
2006-07-07 16:58:30 · 27 answers · asked by wakalualua 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Not sure (from a guy).
2006-07-07 17:00:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can forgive anyone one time. When my ex cheated on me and apologized all over himself for it and begged for a second chance, I accepted the apology. I told him that if it ever happened again, he would be gone and that is exactly what happened. I would not have forgiven the first time if we didnt have kids, but I felt I should give the kids dad a chance. When he screwed up the second time, the kids were told the whole story as to why I made their dad leave. I didnt want them to think mom was the bad guy and I was not going to lie to them and tell mommy and daddy were having problems, when it was daddy with the problem!
2006-07-08 00:09:20 · answer #2 · answered by sweetnessmo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because marriage is a committment for life, and forgiveness is an OK thing. As long as the root of the problem has been adressed and counseling has helped re-strengthen the bond, then marriages can be saved.
Outside of the committment of marriage, someone cheats, the othr person should jsut bail. It's ridiculous. Someone who can't leave either has extremely low self-esteem, or is in an abusive, controlling relationship and is SCARED to leave.
2006-07-08 00:01:55 · answer #3 · answered by KB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love someone enough then you will allow them mistakes and hope that they learn from it. They might learn from it and never cheat again.
It doesn't give the guy a greenlight to do it again if you forgive and move on. It shows them that you are willing to work through something.
If they cheat again - then you have to realize that they will not learn or change, and decide if it's something you are willing to put up with.
2006-07-08 00:06:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that the women is giving them the green light to do it again maybe they have low self esteem and they believe that they won't do again. But we all know once a cheater always a cheater. Some women are just more secure and stronger than other women.
2006-07-08 00:03:16 · answer #5 · answered by LouMomma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women want to hope that the man they love will change .. and if there are children involved they will try to keep the marriage together for them.. problem is most women cant really forgive or forget and the lack of trust eventually ends up being to much for them to bare later to the point that it kills the relationship anyways..
2006-07-08 00:39:03 · answer #6 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Speaking as half of a married couple... who have both cheated(not while married, but when dating).... people DO change if they want to. So, once a cheater always a cheater is not true. There are often extenuating circumstances and just saying "he/she cheated so I'm leaving" is not always the best thing to do. People do stupid **** sometimes and everyone deserves a second chance. You learn that everything is not black and white and you learn to compromise and trust.
2006-07-08 00:06:35 · answer #7 · answered by heidielizabeth69 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes they give the guy a second chance and if he does it again they really do leave. Some women have been so beaten down by abusive men, they are afraid to leave. Once a cheater, always a cheater. Women should leave immediately.
2006-07-08 00:03:30 · answer #8 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Id say that its just a chance for the guy to redeem himself and prove he wont cheat some men HONESTLY do make the mistake one time and learn their lesson OTHERs are cheaters for life and will never learn... Just because we give them a second chance doesnt mean we are weak because I have a theory you can make a mistake ONE TIME but if you do it twice it wasnt a mistake! Nothing wrong with trying to work something out if its worth saving!
2006-07-08 00:03:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i can say that it is possible that with counseling thing could change there relationship for the better, but your right, to leave a relationship is a difficult decision, because there is lots of factors, kids, bills, ect, the reason men cheat is so varied, so i agree it is the best thing to think before acting, so think of it this way, it isn't your decision, or your life, so before u judge, just try to understand, all the sides, i agree it usually is the best to leave the situation, but that isnt always the answer.
2006-07-08 00:09:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well this is from a woman's perspective, but I don't agree with the "once a cheat, always a cheat" saying. I had a affair about 3 years ago and my husband stayed with me and we're working it out. I have no intentions of repeating my sins.
2006-07-08 00:06:28 · answer #11 · answered by clara_bell81 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋