My wife, just out of the blue, told me that i can have other sex partners if i want. She says that it has to be for sex only, no feelings. Why would she tell me this. We have been married for 8 years and have a 4 year old daughter. I have never felt, befor now, that she would cheat on me and i have never considered cheating on her. I love her with every ounce of life that is whithin me.
Is she cheating on me and how do i go about asking her without damaging our relationship.
Please help if you can. Thankyou.
2006-07-07 16:23:22 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she is so lucky that some1 love her like u do...
i hope i can find that love too.
in my opinion u need to talk to her and tell her that u dont understand why she said that to u...
be honest to her and tell her that u r hurt the way she act....
hope it helps
2006-07-07 16:30:41 · answer #1 · answered by capricorn girl 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hard to say if she is cheating but maybe she's having the idea of having sex with other partners and giving you permission to do it is like her now being allowed to.
Talk to her and bring up the topic of sex with others, ask her is there a specific reason she would want you or her to do this. Ask her is there something missing in your relationship that she feels she needs to find elsewhere? After 8 years a couple can fall into a pattern and it can get boring.
I would talk to her about all this with an open mind on trying new things that may help her. Maybe she is sexually frustrated and looking to try something new.
Good Luck and I hope your wife knows how lucky she is to have a husband who cares.
2006-07-07 23:31:26 · answer #2 · answered by having_a_blonde_day_lol 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's cheating on you allright!!! For her to tell you to do that is her letting you know that something is going on, and if you go off and have sex with other girls, then she won't feel guilty about it. She could even want you to, so that she can use it as a convenient excuse for her cheating and wanting a divorce!
Asking without damaging your relationship???? Buddy, what do you think happened when she told you to go out and have sex with other women????????? Straightforwardness is the best way to go my man!! Just plain ask her if she is screwing other guys! If she denies it, watch for how defensive she may get, or if she refuses to let the subject go. Remember the old proverb, "Me thinks thou dost protest too much."
2006-07-07 23:29:39 · answer #3 · answered by rhino 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you still have a healthy sex life?
If she isn't interested in cheating on YOU... it could be that she isn't interested in having sex at all, and feels guilty withholding that from you, and instead of divorcing you - she is giving you an out to have sex with someone else, but still stay with her.
You guys need a serious talk, and possibly counseling, because either way, ths is a SERIOUS issue that could ruin your marriage.
2006-07-07 23:35:13 · answer #4 · answered by KB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't stress yourself out thinking about this because we as men will
never understand why women do and say the things they do and if you
ponder on this too long you may begin to lose trust and that's not good
for a marriage or any relationship for that matter.
the only way to get an answer to a question is to just ask .
and if you find that shes sincere about you having another women just
make sure its a threesome and she picks the partner .
2006-07-08 00:02:41 · answer #5 · answered by brother2thenight 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Communication is the key to your situation. you need to say something like ..hey Hun...I was just thinking about it...and well ...why would you tell me that I could have sex with someone else?...Tell her you love her ...and respect her and that YOU would never dishonor your love for her and your family by doing something like sleeping with someone else.
This will set her up for the next step....
ask her if she wants to sleep with other men. this should open up the pathways of communication...to hopefully set your mind at ease. My hubby and I have been married for 6 1/2 years. He has asked me the same question that your have has asked you . It broke my heart to think that he might be cheating or was just thinking about sleeping with other women. We had basically this conversation...and in the end, he just felt like he didn't satisfy me. I'm hoping your situation is as simple. ...hope all is well. keep us posted.
2006-07-07 23:31:28 · answer #6 · answered by kissy_karissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may not be cheating yet, but my guess is she has somebody lined up. If asking her an important question like this would damage your relationship you don't have a relationship. Talk to her...it won't get better if you don't...it'll get worse and you guys have a daughter to consider.
2006-07-07 23:28:53 · answer #7 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when a woman says this. and you have been married .8. years something isnt right with this . you stated you have a.4. year old daughter. . and she told you out of the blue. to do this with other women . in my open opion . yes. she is a woman dont change that quick and the sad thing she forgot about the child in my opion she lacks[morals]. to her family. and has only thought of her feelings toward whoever . . my opion yes she is. . my opion?
2006-07-08 01:29:37 · answer #8 · answered by the_silverfoxx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say, yes, she is cheating on you, and trying to get you to, so she doesn't feel as guilty.
Ask her straight out about it. I don't see how that can damage your relationship more than you having other sex partners...or her.
2006-07-07 23:35:46 · answer #9 · answered by jimmy h 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh dear. You need to talk to her in a way that is not threatening.
How if your sex life with your wife? Let me say something seriously.... have you ever bought books on sex? Have you ever read about Tantra? Perhaps there is something missing (at least for her) in your relationship. You need to understand what is missing for her. It may not be obvious.
2006-07-07 23:32:33 · answer #10 · answered by milliondollarman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may not be cheating on you but she's probably thinking about it. Just ask her. I mean she told you it's ok to have other sex partners...don't you think that's a statment that could damage your relationship?
2006-07-07 23:27:40 · answer #11 · answered by Isabel 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋