What are some good ways to deal with anger in close personal relationships?

Question

[Asking from within the ubiquitous context of spousal domestic relations!]

Answer 1

Discuss issues when you are both calm, with an agreement in advance to take a "time out" if things heat up even a bit. Resume discussions at a later time. Bring in an objective third party (trained and licensed counselor) if you need help discussing some issues.

On a day to day basis, refrain from pushing the other persons buttons, even if they try pushing yours, try not to respond to that.

Take a walk to cool down.

Approach things with humour ... good sincere humour ... never the sick kind that is aimed at hurting.

If you are in a place that arguing/anger is a frequent issue, then I highly recommend marriage counseling.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Get above the anger zone. Get in touch with your Spiritual self, whether it be contemplation, meditation, prayer, whatever your means. Go within to your heart center and get in touch with the love that is always within you. Find the love that you once felt for your partner. Now, come back and act with that love. Having said that, it's important to recognize that there may be issues within the relationship that need serious attention. If that is the case, find a good therapist, invite your partner, but go, even if your partner does not. A good therapist will help you sort out the issues and find your own answers.

Answer 3

From the day i got married things seemed so rosy for the first six months, then it came to a stage where I came to really discoveri the true attitude of my spouse. We started having arguments but thats normal in a marriage..to have arguments, to learn from, to experience, to improve, to work at differences and to come to an understanding. I guess you could say, two people arent the same and you must learn to work things out. I have been in a marriage where i've tried working things out despite being assaulted often but my advice to you is dont give up trying to work at a true relationship if you think its worth fighting for. Anger - get out of the house or try to keep your cool. Control your mouth to avoid any negative things if uttered will ruin your relationship. Take time out..go to a place to be alone and to cool yourself down. Talk to someone whom you trust to share what you feel if you cant share it at that moment with your spouse. Talking to someone helps believe me.. Dont keep quite and let it all erupt later where you will regret your actions.

Answer 4

what my wife and i do,its rare we argu, but when there is something wrong between us, ill cook a nice supper for her, with candlelight, soft music,no phones, or any interuptions, sit down with her at the table, hold each others hands and look at her in the eyes, and talk to her softly, and ask what is wrong, and try to talk calm with her, give sudjestions, and take some to, try to compremise, it works great for us, we never go to bed angry with each other,you never know when one never wakes up, and you didnt have the chance to say im sorry, and i love you, weve been together for 10 years, and im sure with the way we work our problems out, well be together again for at least another 10 years, if not more, just try it, youll be surprised.

Answer 5

Breath and count to 3
If that don't work walk away
If that don't work seek counseling
If that don't work get a divorce

Answer 6

Instead of becoming angry at someone tell yourself: "There is something I do not understand here. There is a reason that they are behaving this way." Listen. "Seek first to understand then be understood."

"No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care."

Answer 7

walk away cool down then talk

Answer 8

don't get angry, just smile, say yes and do what you think you should do.