Do you think a mother who chooses an epidural is less of a woman?

Question

A group of us ladies were talking about this and one woman gave birth to all her children without any medication, she seemed to think she was a stronger woman than those who chose to take an epidural because she did it "naturally".

It made a few of the other ladies feel bad about their choice to take the epidural.



What do you think about this?

Answer 1

There are people in this world who can only feel better about themselves by trying to make others feel inferior. I'm sure when she talks about her kids they're always better than yours - they walked and talked sooner than yours, they're amazingly smart for their age, they have the athletic talent of a kid 5 years older. Sound familiar?

Not only is there no harm to the baby from an epidural, but it's easier on the baby because the mother is less stressed. I know women had tons of babies before modern medicine, but it's a fact that a lot more women died during child birth back then.

Whenever someone tries to make themself look better by trying to make others look stupid, uncaring, uninformed, etc., just smile and say, "Isn't that nice."

If they ask why you always say, "Isn't that nice," reply by telling them that you were taught to be polite, and you say, "Isn't that nice," instead of telling them what a pompous jerk they're being.

Answer 2

Oh, obviously! You're a MUCH better mother if you suffer, suffer, suffer while giving birth. It's also a good idea to have sore nipples, or even better, to have inverted nipples, so you really have something to moan about. NOT.
I don't know what sort of superioric masochist your friend is, but how much pain is involved in giving birth has absolutely nothing to do with how good a mother you are. It's such a totally ridiculous idea, it's hard to even take it seriously. There is a case to be made for keeping medication to a minimum, as some things do pass through the placenta, but that doesn't happen with an epidural because they use only a local anesthetic.
The reason for an epidural is to prevent tearing. You heal better, and you're in a lot better shape to resume sexual relations with your husband if you have an epidural rather than having a ragged tear.
Tell your friend to go get a life.

Answer 3

I think the woman who thinks she's more of a woman for doing it naturally is actually less of a woman because she's being so cocky about it. I originally wasn't going to have an epidural with my first baby, but decided against it. I know I could have gone on and done it, but I was tensing up SO much during my contractions and was preventing my body from doing what it needed to do. If I had chosen not to ask for the epidural, labor would have been a sh!t load longer and would have possibly ended in a c-section.

I think you should tell this woman if she ever has kids via a c-section, to opt to do it 'naturally' and decline to take the spinal block/epidural. We'll see who's stronger then...

Answer 4

She is a hypocrite. Every woman is different. Their bodies experience pain differently. She is no better than any other woman because she didn't have an epidural. I am sure she would have chose an epidural if she had complications or didn't dialate for 10 hours straight. In my mind, she is weak and insecure to pass judgement and make you all feel bad. I had 3 children, one epidural, one naturally and a c-section. I didn't have a choice. Not all women can choose the outcome of their labor. Ask her if she would be a stronger, better woman by getting stitches with no anaesthetic.

Answer 5

I thought I was going to be a tough-guy- ehhh girl when I had my first kid. YEAH RIGHT. It hurts sooo bad. If someone has a medical condition that forces them to have a c-section they are not less of a woman. Neither is someone that has an epidural. When this conversation gets brought up and you have people that think they are better, answer it like I do. I wouldn't get my tooth pulled without anesthesia, why would I deliver a baby without it? Lets face it.... delivering a baby is a lot more pain that a tooth getting pulled.

These are the same women who think they are "better" because they breastfeed. Or because they stay at home with the kids.

I did both breast and bottle and honestly, is it more work to bottle feed- so where is the argument? Also I used to work, and being a working mom is much more difficult. It doesn't make anyone better its a matter of preference.

Answer 6

A woman is no less of a woman just because she choose to take an epidural. As a matter of fact any woman that gives birth either with or without an epidural is a strong woman because she carried another human. It's a choice and with today's technology every woman has a choice.

Answer 7

An epidural does not take away from the 40 weeks of pregnancy and future 18 years of parenting that define you as a woman.

An epidural is an aid to help your body relax and do what nature intended. Some epidurals take away all feelings of pain and control in movement. Others take away a little pain but leave enough for you to feel some of it. Either way a smart woman looks out for what is best for their baby. After I had my epidurals my body cervix did what it needed to do without me being tense from the contractions.

Pregnant with my third child now and hoping for an epidural but realize I may end up going naturally too, it's all up to your stages of labor, the baby and your doctor/midwife.

Answer 8

I do not think that is the case -everyone has a different level of pain they can take. I had an epidural and I found that I was able to focus on the job on hand (so to say) much better. When the mother is in less distress it is easier for the baby. (anyway that is what I think) There is always someone who want to be the "poor me" or the because I did it this way my way is better friend. (that is just a sad fact of some people they always want to one up or think that there way is the best) Whenever a child is born (no matter how ) it is a miracle -does it mean you love your child less because you wanted to be relaxed and enjoy giving birth to your child or children? (hmm I think not. anyway good luck I think this is a inserting topic.

Answer 9

As a medical assistant every woman is different and some can take pain better than others. Just because you have an epidural it does not make you any less of a woman. If it's to much to bear I say bring the drugs!

Answer 10

No!!!! I decided before I went into the hospital that I wasn't going to have an epidural, but 2 days and lots of little contractions later, when I finally went active, I was so tired, I was like bring it on! The meds are there for a reason, to make a moms life easier. There is nothing wrong with taking the epidural!

Answer 11

I have had two boys, both about the same size. For my first I had the epi, and my labor and delivery while still slightly uncomfortable, was a wonderful experience. For my second I had to go natural, I was in alot more pain and did not get as much of a joyful exp, until I was handed my son of course. It takes more of a woman to be able to make the decision to remember this wonderful time and not all the pain. Next baby, I am definitely going with the epidural.