He has told me before sex is not that important to him. He said he only needs it like 2 times a month. Well I'm lucky if I get that. Hes in his mid thirties I'm in my mid twenties. Okay but a few years ago he had masturbated too much with no lubricant and tore the skin off it. He had to wrap his penis for two weeks with gauze. Made me sick. Now a few days ago I find lube in a shoe in his closet. I'm a little freaked out. I'm a pretty girl with a good body I take care of myself and look nice for him every day. Also I've always been a freak in the bed so whats his problem? Could he be gay?
2006-07-07 08:35:27 · 19 answers · asked by ajaxwashere 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My husband told me the same things a few years back , I found *** in his underwear all the time and he said he was jacking off alot but come to find out he had been having an affair on me with a married woman that I knew and he worked with her husband , my advice to you is if your in doubt then check it out, good luck
2006-07-08 10:51:53 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know where you are and my man is the same way. I told him how it was affecting me and he went to the Doctor and was tested to see if it was a medical reason. There isn't and he has a very low sex drive is all. He also masturbates which most men do. When he is in the mood and I am not around or busy with the kids he takes care of himself as I do when I am in the mood which is alot!! It is a decision you have to make if you are OK with this and if not you need to let him know that you need a man that is going to take care of your urges. In my case we are deeply in love and I couldn't ask for a better man. i know on occasion I have had the though of finding a discreet bed buddy but I couldn't hurt him like that. The best thing I can tell you is to sit and talk honestly and openly about the whole situation. My heart is with you
2006-07-07 08:48:00 · answer #2 · answered by twinsmakesfive 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Confront him about it. Ask him straight out if he is gay or if he's into something that he thinks will shock you. Maybe he has performance anxiety? Do you criticize his abilities? Do you put him down for not satisfying you? Keep in mind that it could be a medical problem or perhaps medication. Certain drugs effect libido, especially anti-depressants. I'm assuming you love your husband.... I dont recommend cheating or finding an f-buddy. You need to communicate with your husband and perhaps seek counseling.
2006-07-07 08:51:46 · answer #3 · answered by Linnygirl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could he be gay? Yes. Could he be bored with you? Unlikely. Could he be unsure of his sexuality (whether he's gay, straight or bi)? Yes. Could he be incapable of physical intimacy (preferring self-help or porn over the real thing)? Yes. Could he be insecure in his masculinity (feel threatened by your sexuality, feel his performance is inadequate compared to yours). Yes.
Most likely? A combination of these things.
Prognosis? He's in his mid thirties. His value system and behavior patterns are already set. Even a beautiful, younger, sexually outgoing young woman hasn't changed them. Your chances of a rich, rewarding, intimate life with this guy are zero. Zilch. Nada. Hopeless. Whatever his self-esteem issue is, you can't help. He can, however, hurt yours.
2006-07-07 08:50:17 · answer #4 · answered by antirion 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he was or is masturbating so much I would say he is probably addicted to porn.Do you have them in the house?If you do maybe you should start keeping an eye on this.
You could also just ask him if he is gay.Sometimes the reaction alone is your answer.
Either way its probably not you and something he is going through.
2006-07-07 08:40:27 · answer #5 · answered by suiki 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Uh....Strong Possibility! Yeah!
2006-07-07 08:43:38 · answer #6 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He could just be "into himself" (especially if he ripped his package off). Then again he could be cheating on you or just gay. I suggest a sex therapist and marriage counseling.
2006-07-07 09:08:21 · answer #7 · answered by King H 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt he is gay, just bored with you. Go out and fine a F Buddy. you;ll be satisfied and let him rub himself out in private. Dress slutty and go after him and see what that brings you
2006-07-07 08:38:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find out what pleases him. Ask him as many questions that you can think of, get in tune with him. Find out why he masterbates and doesn't have sex with you. It may not be you. That incident may have traumatized him, or maybe something happened in the past.....FIND OUT!!! Don't blame yourself, and definetly, DEFINETLY DON'T ASSUME!!!
2006-07-07 08:41:24 · answer #9 · answered by jcdunbar0312 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps he finds the freak thing intimidating?
2006-07-07 08:41:46 · answer #10 · answered by Rockin' Mel S 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋