My husband and I have been togeather for 9 years with a few seperations for I am only 25, we have been married for 3 years. I truely LOVE him, and can't picture living without him, But the older I get the more I close up towards him. Is this my personal issue needing to be dealt with, or has my relationship lost its meaning?
2006-07-07 08:06:19 · 7 answers · asked by hamil 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Frankly, these things are almost never either/or. The answer is almost always both. There is probably a deterioration in the relationship, very natural for young couples, and your personal psychology is causing you to react by closing up. You're trying to protect yourself from the eventual sadness you will feel from breaking up, but in the course, by closing him off, you increase the chances of the break-up exponentially.
In short, the more you pull away, the worse the relationship will get, the more you will try to build up a defense against pain by pulling away. You must break this chain by talking first to your partner, then possibly to a professional (preferably together).
Best of luck. I hope you two find an answer
2006-07-07 08:13:43 · answer #1 · answered by soma_0806 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
9 years is a long time to be with someone, and you're still very young. If you love him and don't want to be without him (and assuming he treats you right) go get some counseling. Trained professionals can help you dig to the root of what's really bothering you. Good luck!
2006-07-07 15:10:33 · answer #2 · answered by SuperJenn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello! The problem isn't your marriage, its you. And I do not mean that in an attacking way. You are shutting yourself out as far as emotional intimacy is concerned.
Perhaps go to counseling for yourself and talk with an objective party about what is going on. I guarantee you will feel more positive about ALL your relationships, when the one with yourself is healthy. Good luck to you!!!!
2006-07-07 15:12:11 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Has he acted any different towards you?
There could be a lot of reasons you feel this way.
If you are closing yourself off from him, ask yourself why? Is he doing something that you dont like or appove of? Is he acting different to you? Is he closing hisself off to you?
Sit down and make a list of what you love about him and what you dont like. When your done, look it over good. You should have your answer.
2006-07-07 15:14:14 · answer #4 · answered by starrynite1958 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry i can't help but that's something you have to figure out yourself. I wish it was as easy for someone else to find out what is wrong sometimes as well but things aren't always that easy as i'm sure you are going to find out.
2006-07-07 15:21:56 · answer #5 · answered by babybro35 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It really sounds like maybe you have grown up and apart from. You should step back and analyze your life and his. You might want to be pen about it with him, maybe he is feeling the same way.
2006-07-07 15:12:04 · answer #6 · answered by pat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go to a marriage counsleor, minister, or pastor to work it out.........
2006-07-07 15:09:45 · answer #7 · answered by silhouette 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋